Looking for examples for my sequel WIP, where I find myself with this exact scenario and I'd like to see how other authors have handled this. To specify, I'm not looking for examples where the sober MC relapses or struggles unduly, nor ones where the non-sober MC tries to tempt the other off the wagon. Just examples of where it's been handled in a mature, healthy way, as that is the direction I'm going in. The non-sober character does not have any addiction issues and currently drinks moderately, though he was a big partier in his teens and early-mid 20's. The sober character was formerly a drug addict and sex worker who has made a complete 180 with her life since going through rehab 5 years before the start of the book. I think mostly I'm looking to see if there's a possibility of my non-sober character remining so, or if for them to get a true HEA (Happily Ever After), he will have to embrace sobriety as well. I write genre Romance so an HEA is 100% non-negotiable.
I can offer you something (hopefully) helpful, though it's not about alcohol or substance abuse but PTSD: 'Between these sheets' by Devon McCormack. One of the guys has PTSD, the other struggles to accept that he's worthy of love. Both of them relapse multiple times into their separate pits, and come together again. The relationship is written with care and love, and the HEA is believable.
I'm sure its possible for a HEA and they wont have to give up anything. Of course, there might need to be some compromise. Sort of reminds me of Bonnie and Adam from that Mom television show. Bonnie's a recovering alcoholic/addict gets together with Adam who isn't sober and he even eventually opens up his own bar. May not be the best example, but that's what I thought of when I read you're thread. I don't have any clever ideas, just wanted to reassure you its possible. Of course there will be ups and downs in every relationship, but I don't see having to have her relapse or the other having to quite altogether, unless you want them too. Lay all the baggage out on the table, and go from there. Good luck!
Realistically, for every relationship that survives your set up, there are many that don't. While your story can obviously be about the unusual success, the conflict still needs to be addressed. Your character has a backstory that strikes me as heavy for Romance genre, though I know nothing about that. With or without the capital R, come to think of it. The recovering addict needs to be advanced in her recovery and show strength through this and other events for it to be believable. You can have conflict and HEA (new one on me, makes me think of concussions in rugby), they both just need to have their heads on right.
I've lived through this in a lightweight way. Ex-girlfriend and I were both smokers and we could never, but never, manage to coordinate our attempts to quit. I'd wake up, resolve that this was going to be the day I became an ex-smoker, and... she'd come home with a fresh carton before I could tell her of my intentions. Not wanting to waste money and all... And it went both ways. We finally got it sorted and accepted that lapses will be lapses (parties, nights out) but that we were done buying. That was just as smoking in general was taking a serious social downturn. But I'm pretty sure your non-sober character is going to have to scale it way back. No more alcohol in the house, boys' nights out are acceptable as long as there aren't more than a few a year, if they're out together at a party or something neither of them drinks. Otherwise the temptation just gets far too great. My 2yen.
I think it all depends on the non-sober character and the circumstances that led to her sobriety. Often sex workers get into the profession to pay for their habits, but there are also those who imbibe so that they can tolerate the profession (sometimes one leads to the other, vicious circle, yada yada.) Did she give it up because she was done with the profession and done with the lifestyle that came along with it, maybe she was just sick of not feeling hungry (if stimulants) or sick of hangovers, etc. or did she give it up because it was ruining her life and/or the motivating factor for her prostitution? If she is the latter, then the HEA is contingent on his sobriety, particularly if she still gets cravings. Like, he comes home from the bar, she smells the whisky on his breath and gets a sudden urge to drink, and she always used coke when she drank, downward spiral, etc. Like Iain said, he will have to scale it way back. If he keeps it out of the house, doesn't come home plastered, etc. then it can totally work depending on her level of addiction/cravings that remain.
Just to give some additional context, this WIP is the sequel to my last book, Gravity, which was about a rock star in recovery (Jaeden) and his personal trainer (Connor), who fall in love amongst a lot of trauma and celebrity BS. It was indeed a very heavy topic, but addiction is not that uncommon a factor in more angsty contemporary Romances. I've read several, but it usually is situation where the sober character falls in with someone who doesn't drink or use themselves. Gravity is actually a perfect example in itself - Connor doesn't drink or use drugs because of his dedication to diet/fitness, so this issue never came up. This is why I've been struggling to determine if my non-sober MC can remain so, since it's part of his established character in the first book. The main MC's in my WIP were secondary characters in Gravity, so their past is already established on page: Krista (the now sober character) was Jaeden's groupie/side piece, and Ethan (the non-sober character) is the frankly asshole lead singer of Jaeden's band, New Schism. The band was the super partying type in the first decade of their career, but now that they are all getting older and settling down, except for Jaeden they are more the "have a few beers and shoot the shit" kind of guys. The circumstances around Krista's recovery were pretty dramatic in Gravity. She overdosed on heroin, Jaden and Connor found her nearly dead, and Jaeden paid for her to go to the same incredibly expensive rehab that he had gone to. At the end of the book, she comes home from rehab a 100% success story, and begins training as a hairdresser so she can live independently and healthily. She turns from a character that is completely focused on banging Jaeden and drugs/alcohol to a woman making a new start with a strong support system for the first time in her life. My editor for Gravity suggested that a sequel with Krista's story would probably be well received since she makes such a transformation, and I've been trying to find the right approach ever since. I absolutely agree with you though that if I do decide that Ethan doesn't need to be sober himself, it needs to be a situation where he doesn't bring anything that could possibly trigger a relapse into their relationship. I guess the question is if that's realistic or not?
Absolutely agreed - I think where I'm spiraling is because sobriety was such a huge part of Gravity because Jaeden was only 90 days out of rehab at the start. I don't really want to come off as some kind of prohibitionist author where the key to everyone's happiness is getting sober. Considering my personal wine consumption, the idea makes me cringe and I don't want to seem preachy. At the same time, Krista was a pretty hardcore addict prior to rehab, so I feel like I need to be realistic about Ethan loving her enough to want to avoid anything that could trigger a relapse. It's times like these where I think I should just start all over again with new characters instead of attempting a sequel, but I really want them to find their own HEA, and from a practical standpoint it's a great way to build on the following of my traditionally published books.
I don't think you have anything to worry about. The world is full of sober/not-sober couples. It might be a nonstarter for some, but being surrounded by drunks and addicts in my line of work, I see them getting along with the other side more often than not. Is the story about recovery? I mean, is that the driving engine? Will Krista constantly be thinking about staying sober and Ethan about triggering her? If so it will draw a lot attention to the sober/not-sober thing, and you'll have address it. More than you'd like to, from what you've been saying.
No, recovery isn't really a driving factor at all. Krista is very secure in her sobriety. In fact, Ethan is the source of most of the conflict - he's coming to terms with Krista as she is now vs. who she was pre-recovery, and he's also starting to realize that being an asshole to everyone around him (seriously, he was such a jerk in Gravity. My editor hated his guts so viscerally she would rant every time he was on the page, lol) has left him with only the most superficial kind of happiness. There's nothing Romancelandia loves more than seeing a bad boy redeemed via the love of a good woman (or man, for that matter). It's totally possible that I'm making a much bigger deal out of this than I need to. Since posting this I've had a few peeps on Twitter send me recommendations for other successful Romance books out there with a similar combo of MCs, and I bought a couple last night. Just want to make sure I'm hitting the right notes for the genre - Romance readers are not always the most receptive when you try to color outside the lines too much, if you get my drift.
Can't think of a book but there's a movie like that Days of Wine and Roses. It's a classic with Jack Lemmon and Lee Remick.
I think it's totally realistic. If Ethan is the singer of the band, and Jaeden is sober now, maybe some of his other industry friends are also growing up and not partying as hard as they used to. As the singer, maybe he is sick of it, maybe he finds Krista's sobriety refreshing. Maybe there is something nice about the thought of settling down and starting a family. It's not like she is going to be the fun police. He can still do his thing, but he respects her enough not to bring it into their relationship. Maybe that could be a plot point, where he comes to her drunk or something like that, and she accuses him of not respecting her and asks him to leave. Perhaps this is an opportunity for introspection, for him to look inwards, gain some insight about his behaviour, being the asshole, partying too hard, etc.
