I have a feeling this post will be deleted, but that's precisely the reason I'm writing. I'm working on some dialog, and can't find another word for 'asshole' that has the same realism and impact. I tested out some synonyms I found online, such as 'unpleasant person', but they sound completely lame, especially from the mouth of a gangster. Anyone know of a good swear thesaurus?
What kind of a gangster are you talking about here? One on the street? An old Western rustler? Depending on the setting of your story, there are several different synonyms that could be used.
You can say asshole in this forum. We're not that prudish. Besides, it's in the context of writing, and that's what we're all about. "Asswipe" or "scumwad" are usually good choices. I assume the gangsters using this word aren't all that bright or creative, so they probably won't get much more original than that. Though "fucktard" has gained some beefiness over the past fifteen years or so, at least on the internet.
I had to chuckle at the idea of a gangster saying something like, "You unpleasant person!" I'm not sure you can really get around it -- gangsters are going to use foul language. Is there some reason you need to avoid it? I'm not so sure it's going to work. Or is it just the particular word "asshole" that you need to avoid? Something along the lines of dick, jackass, fucker would work, but are you trying to avoid them, too?
My personal favourites are 'douchebag', 'twat', 'dick', 'prick', 'dickhead', 'motherfucker', and the ultimate, 'cunt'... Because it's all in quotes, it's not swearing
"You insignifi-cunt!" Can't use that, though. Someone else's coinage (Boondock Saints), but I do think it's pretty funny
Most people I know just say asshole. When you start using words like dickweed it just sounds like you're trying too hard, least that's my opinion.
Here are a few options I've seen (randomly going from mild to worse): -loser -tool -douche -jackass -numbnuts -wanker -jerkoff -jerkwad -dickless -twat -asshat -assclown -cockshiner -dickhead -dickhole -shitstick -cheesedick -fuckstick (combination of fucktard and shitstick ) -cumbucket -cunt Gotta love Boondock Saints.
Wow, a lot of great ideas! The problem is this: I'm writing a short story, but the submission requirements state pretty clearly that anything worse that 'damn' might be too offensive for their readers. So I was wondering if there were other words that had the same oomph without being technically 'swears'. I guess I'm going to have to get really creative.. Thanks for the replies, I'm good to go now.
I find George W. Bush synonymous with the word asshole. There is also a personal favourite of mine. . .Bawbag. Not technically interchangeable with asshole and perhaps too colloquial for your usage but a classic nevertheless.
There is something you should know about tough gangsters, the one thing that almost all of them have in common; is fear of themselves and the world around them. They're scared. I have a few suggestions that might sound bizarre and unrealistic, but some gangsters (especially the young ones) have a lot of creativity and a good sense of vicious humor. Especially when they're about to do something nasty. This is what a really tough gangster would say: Bumditch Behindhole Arsenest Bumhole Backcrack Bumgap Backpit Arsebreach Bumshaft Arse-den Backvent Bum-dimple Arsedip Ok, I'll stop... I only used 'asshole' combinations. I can give you a ton more if you want, that don't have to do with the human defecation exit. The more original insult you send your helpless victim's way, the more cred and laughs you get from your 'bros'! On a more serious note though; reality can sometimes be really, really bizarre and truly (ww1 style) over-the-top... especially when it involves humans and their emotions.
Thanks! An interesting point you make. So finding a unique replacement word might actually be better for the story than using 'asshole' after all..
