An amorphous mass of electrons shambles toward the virtual podium. Once there, it reorganizes itself into a vaguely humanoid shape, and taps three times on the live microphone. Tap . . . tap . . . tap. "Testing . . . testing . . . testing,” it says in a deliberate, electronically-tinged manner. Then it waits for the empty room to quiet—as if empty rooms actually needed to quiet. “Greetings, I am Chudz. And I have arrived here after many twists and turns through the infrastructure that makes up the Interwebz. I am in search of a place that will help me improve my writing and offer some semblance of community. For no Chudz is an island!” Once it is done speaking, the form dissipates, leaving a trace of ozone in the air. Chudz.