It's on my bucket list "We have this huge wooden cable drum. What are we gonna do with it?" -"I wonder if we can roll someone around on that." (we could) -"It's twice the size of our brazier, we should... nah, it'll be fine." (it wasn't) -"Let's set in on fire and roll it downhill!" (skipped that one)
I too am a pyro. Long, long ago in a relationship from ages past, my ex and I would rent a log cabin in the Blue Ridge Mountains every year between Thanksgiving and Christmas. It had a HUGE flagstone fireplace. The first year I went through an entire cord of wood and we had to pay to get extra. The subsequent years we asked that they provide two cords and we happily paid the additional charge. You need to read my Podrick fanfiction, man. It's a series of stories called The Tales of Podrick the Round and Timmor the Red. I think you might like it.
I'll show you mine if you show me yours. Hairy belly, that is. Maybe you're fishing in the wrong pond I don't know who Podrick is, but I'll check it out. Though, right now I don't need it; my new guy is—how did you once describe it?—ah yes, here: That describes him perfectly
There's this thing we call anwampen. Basically, the guys (and gals, should they feel like it) get their shirts off, stick their bellies out and play bumper cars with 'em. A sport for you? Worth it. Nothing so romantic as things burning.
Welp, I can try and fish in your pond but that'll leave me pretty hungry for sure. But maybe I've got this fishing metaphor turned around - a hairy belly wouldn't make me an attractive fish in the ponds I'm swimming in - uhm, what?
I saw a Domina's catch yesterday. Seems it was a party since 10 hooks got him. Poor little sucker never stood a chance.