TMW you are reading a roaring dumpster fire of a novel, and wishing all the characters would get shot in the head for being too dumb, too douchey, and quite possibly not even remotely human. (Oh god, WTF have I done in reading this?!)
I assume he means worth1000.com which got taken over by design crowd in 2016 - designcrowd is a site a bit like 99 designs or fiverr
TMW you are inspecting the garage timbers and see a nail in an odd place. As you touch it the timber disintegrates in a honeycomb avalanche. TMW you realize the whole corner of the garage is slightly sunken. TMW you know how to fix it. Fuck me sideways. The rodents have chewed in to eat the termites. I'm in hell.
I have no idea what a PPO is, but my advice is a fountain pen to the face. Most people have a very reasonable fear of going blind and will usually avoid activities where they feel that's a threat. Except for blind people, of course, but they're not exactly known for being Where's Wally champions. Good luck, though. Stay safe.
Personal protection order, or something like that? Yikes. Stay safe, indeed. Frustrating not to be able to do anything to help you. Hope the online moral support is worth something.
A shit-ton of spankle? Gasoline and a blowtorch? Nope. A 3-ton hydraulic jack, bracing beams, Sawzall, pry bar(s), plug cutter (to test where bad wood stops), treated wood, or a fuck-ton of licked popsicle sticks, prayer beads. Better a bottle of whiskey, a gun, and a bullet. I'm too old for this shit.
That moment when the DJ started talking over the end of the song before you could hit the pause button
I'd just read Cave Trolls comment so for a few minutes I did step back in time (but not as far back at 1983, my Dad would have killed me had he caught me playing with his stereo)
... you realise the picture of an ageing Judy Garland you're looking is actually Renee Zellweger playing her in a new biopic. ... you do an image search for Renee Zellweger as Judy Garland, and find there's actually more pictures of her looking absolutely nothing like the iconic actress, than there is that do.
Easy fix. Knock it down and put up a steel building in its place. You could also have some fun with it and call the fire department to see if they want some practice putting out a structure fire.
Holy shizzlenokken! It is an awesome idea, though there's too much stuff to move first. Funny enough, I am going to blowtorch the small spots on less-affected timbers, to invite them NOT to come back. I'd tear everything out, but the stucco needs to stay pinned to original wood. I'd love to put up steel, though.
TMW the girlfriend begs me to wear a sweater just for today, so I find one in the closet. "Huh, a London hoodie in my closet?" *tries it on* "Damn, this is tight...looks okay though." Niece: "Uncle...why are you wearing my hoodie?" Me: "Well...because... ♫ ~ I feel stunning and entrancing, feel like running and dancing for joy ~ ♫ .... of course" Niece: "....O....k.....just don't spray cologne on it..."