To those with a keen eye.

Here is a quote from britishcouncel.org

“If you are talking about the past but you mention something that is still true you could use a present tense form to show you agree that it is true:”

Here is a quote from hubpages.com

“You are with me in the moment as I write it. So present tense can be used in dialogue effectively and in some types of statements you can use it in the same sentence with past tense -- implying something that's continuously true and still true.”

Now for my actual paragraph:

As for the Laguna, it was void of human activity. I felt a little displaced, like I wasn’t supposed to be there. Except for the accompaniment of distant seagulls and the steady gulf breeze, it seemed somewhat other-worldly. When I brought myself, I brought the only sample of human kind. Yes, to venture the water is to go into isolation and loneliness.

The last sentence holds true througout the story. Is the tense valid?

 

I think

would work better than 'is' ?

 

I agree with shakespear, that wording does sound better. However, I do believe that your original sentence was correct.

Also, should it be "to venture into the water"?

 

I believe you are correct that the present tense is still true and therefore it still applies. However, should it not be, "Yes! To venture upon the water is an exercise of isolation and loneliness."

I dislike the term, 'to go into'. I think it's a split infinitive and doesnt read well imo. I also think the, Yes! is a stand alone statement.

 

I do agree with Jowettc on the whole "to go into" business. It is always best to find an interesting way to word things, as long as it doesn't end up seeming overly flashy.

However, on the question of whether it should be "Yes!" or "Yes," I think it depends on the emotions present. Adding the exclamation point seems to give it a feel of excitement, almost, which doesn't really flow with the mood of the passage overall. The use of a comma instead gives the feel of answering an unspoken question, as if the speaker is doubting their own presence in this place - which is also depicted as sort of eerie and disturbing.

 

I think I would say:

To venture into water is like going into isolation and loneliness.

Here you have made a comparison/metaphor therefore you are to use the present continuous to suggest continuity.

 

yes, the tense is correct, because it's a statement of fact, not action within the narrative, which would have to be consistently past tense...

however, the 'yes' stuck onto the beginning for no apparent reason makes no sense, since it's not answering a question, or countering an opposing viewpoint and an exclamation is out of place there...

 

Wow, maia, you're good. I appreciate the extra input.

 

Update: I've been going through my manuscript. I'm screwed.

 

You're not screwed. From what I hear, most writers re-write their books half a dozen times. I even read somewhere that Hemingway re-wrote one of his books 43 times, so don't despair.

 

Thanks jc. I'm trying.

 

I understand how you feel, trust me... it's hard enough just reaching the manuscript stage. Re-writing it all scares the heck out of me.

 

Yes, that's where I'm at.

 

Aw.

I actually love that.

It's that "Thank God I caught this ish now... I have a lot of interesting work to do" moment.

 

Maia,
You pointed out ‘distant’.
Why?

 

i didn't just 'point it out'... i moved it... where i placed it makes it clear that the 'accompaniment' is what was distant, which makes better sense than being accompanied by something that's far away, as you had it...

 

Um... it's not actually. The infinitive is 'to go' and the the preposition is outside that, so it doesn't split it at all.

However it's true that there is probably a more interesting way of phrasing it.