1. Max Vantage

    Max Vantage Banned

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    Action, Action, Action!

    Discussion in 'Support & Feedback' started by Max Vantage, Jan 7, 2007.

    Anyone know why there is no action genre in the short stories forum? Or would any action genre fiction come under 'General Fiction'?

    Help a Max out here.
     
  2. Crazy Ivan

    Crazy Ivan New Member

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    Well, what kind of action is it?

    If it's Mission Impossible-type action, it would probably go under Mystery.
     
  3. Max Vantage

    Max Vantage Banned

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    Eh? :confused:

    Sorry, but I'm not convinced that writers of mystery would use Arnie Schwarzenegger to go and investigate a murder in a quite countryside with an Uzi 9mm, an anti-tank rocket launcher, a tank, an Apache gunship and a nuke all strapped to his belt.

    Then again, that sounds like an awesome original idea! Cheers for the inspiration. :D

    I'll be back...
     
  4. ariella

    ariella New Member

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    OK well after having a look, if I had written some action piece and wanted to post it, I really wouldn't be posting it in the General Fiction.

    I think an Action genre would be a good idea personally. Makes it easier on the readers and the authors, looks tidier as well I feel.
     
  5. Max Vantage

    Max Vantage Banned

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    The sparrows sing their merry tune in the fresh midsummer morning. A crisp breeze creeps its way through the peaceful village; the farm animals snoozing on this laziest of Sundays.
    And all through the village serenity delves into every old-aged villager fast asleep in their cosy beds with not even a stir.
    BOOM!
    The cannon fodder of new resident Johnny Gothisgun erupts into the far reaching sky. Many a villager jumps out of the bed, some with heart attacks.
    BOOM! John fires again.
    “Come on, you swine dogs of Satan,” John shouts into a loudspeaker at the whole of the village. “I want fifty laps around the entire village, and if I don’t get them then it’s no oatmeal and porridge for any of you!”

    Cyril, the village mayor and the youngest at 96, creeps his way to John’s cottage a mere 10 metres away. After six hours he finally arrives.
    John, bare-chested, is busying himself in the back yard snapping trees in half with his bare hands for firewood. Smelling the mayor’s scent downwind John whips out his Colt Python from his crotch whilst simultaneously launching his body to the ground for cover.
    “Halt, you swinum, or I’ll unload a whole five clips into your ass and still have enough time to eat a whole live cow before you’ve even fallen to the ground.” He shouts in his strong Austrian accent.
    Alarmed, Cyril holds his hand up to show he doesn’t mean any harm. “Goodness gracious me, John. One of these days you’ll give me a heart attack.”
    John holsters his gun and brushes himself off.
    “What do you want?”
    “I’m afraid there’s been a terrible catastrophe. Olga has been murdered! You must investigate this and apprehend this most vicious and vile, disreputable creature at once, I demand it…if you would be so kind”.
    “Hmm…” John rubs his chin, his stubble thicker than a baboon’s newly shorn arse. “No I cannot. There is no more war for me now. I said to the general that I quit. I’m a man of peace now.”
    “I realise this, young man. But Miss Marple refuses to want to get involved, Mr. Hercule Poirot is too busy, Jessica Fletcher is too busy sticking her nose up everyone else’s backside and Sherlock Holmes, y’see, is just a work of fiction.”
    “Alright, I’ll do it. Even though that may sound completely implausible considering my understandable reasoning not to as I have just explained, I feel my character too cheap to refuse for too long (this is action after all!)”
    “Excellent!” Cyril says in delight.
    John grips Cyril by the neck and hoists him up in the air and squeezing hard, the pressure in his hand exacting that of an industrial vice grip. Cyril’s neck begins cracking.
    “Tell me who did it! You must tell me now!” John shouts, cracking his huge knuckles into Cyril’s head repeatedly. “Tell me what I want to know or I will break your ass!”
    With one last punch Cyril’s life ceases to exist. John throws his corpse to the floor whereby he places one huge foot on it, both his clenched hands rested on his hips, his bare chest puffed out whilst scanning the entire village proudly as if he owns it.
    “Well, that solves that case.” John proclaims proudly. “Time for a sequel because I’m back and badder than ever, baby!”


    I think it's genius! :D :D :D
     
  6. ariella

    ariella New Member

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    Yeah not too bad at all. :):)

    Seriously don't know how the heck you can come up with something like that so quickly though and it actually be descent.

    Impressive. :)
     
  7. Max Vantage

    Max Vantage Banned

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    Eh!!! :confused: :D Bwahahahahahahaha! Just taking the piss out of myself really! lol

    The reason I ask is because I'd like to eventually write and post fanfiction on the Predator stories which I really love. They are actually action plots but there's no forum for it.

    Maybe if I buy LPspider a pint something'll happen? :confused: :D
     
  8. Fantasy of You

    Fantasy of You Banned

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    The reason there's no action category probably has something to do with action being a subgenre. If you're unsure as how to categorise your fan-fic, go with general.

    - FoY
     
  9. ariella

    ariella New Member

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    No cause the general section seriously is not the right place for action.

    You should definately give the pint a go Max, who know's might work. LOL :)
     
  10. Crazy Ivan

    Crazy Ivan New Member

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    If it's Predator, than that would be Sci-Fi.
     
  11. Max Vantage

    Max Vantage Banned

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    Or is it predominantly action with elements of sci-fi?

    *Extends LP a virtual pint*

    (That should do the trick ;) :D )

    If there would be such a forum then I'm sure that, along with myself, Hulls Raven and Swiper would appreciate it.
     
  12. Daniel

    Daniel I'm sure you've heard the rumors Founder Staff

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    Hmm... I would think that "Crime and Thriller" would cover most action stories. I guess not?
     
  13. Robert

    Robert Banned

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    I've never seen 'action' recognised as a genre anywhere, as far as I can recall. Probably gets rolled into Adventure or Thriller or something similar.

    Cheers,
    Rob
     

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