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Which of these statements is true for you?

  1. I believe my destiny is in my own hands

    13 vote(s)
    76.5%
  2. I believe my destiny is out of my control

    4 vote(s)
    23.5%
  1. Alastair Woodcock

    Alastair Woodcock Active Member

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    Which of these statements is true for you?

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Alastair Woodcock, Mar 18, 2018.

    I read something about this last year. Curious to know how people respond. It apparently says a lot about you and your personality.
     
  2. Mink

    Mink Contributor Contributor

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    My destiny is my own hands. While outside situations can guide my hand and the opportunities available, I ultimately make the decision.

    I think the answer to this question can tell you a lot about a person, too.
     
  3. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I answered "in my own hands", but I'm kinda' split. Like the way general relativity and quantum mechanics both work and make sense separately, but don't agree with one another. My fate is obviously my own to make. But I'm also a born cynic. There are certain aspects of human behavior that I don't think are surmountable by just personal effort. Mob behavior is a real thing and has a digital version. We are pack animals, similar to canines, as regards our core programming and that also guides large-scale behavior. *shrug*
     
  4. Robert Musil

    Robert Musil Comparativist Contributor

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    Do you have a particular definition of "destiny" in mind?
     
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  5. awkwarddragon

    awkwarddragon Member

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    Voted, "In my own hands." But it's fair to say that external influences play a part in my decisions.
     
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  6. MusingWordsmith

    MusingWordsmith Shenanigan Master Contributor

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    Didn't vote because I'm both and neither- I'm Christian so I believe that the Lord is watching out for me and guiding my steps. But at the same time those steps are my choice. So I know as long as I do my best, everything will work out for my good.
     
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  7. Andrew Alvarez

    Andrew Alvarez Senior Member

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    I voted out of control. There's an illusion of control that would love to achieve in every activity, but I'm certain that most of events are under control of something greater. I can favor certain things to happen, and remove choices from randomness to place them into ethics or usefulness, but there's always a suspicion of that this "act" called life is set up and played by something or someone bigger and smarter than me... so is the so-called destiny.
     
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  8. Methanogen

    Methanogen Member

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    I believe my destiny- which I consider just to be what choices I make, as I don't believe in fate or anything- is in my own hands. Yes, external factors will contribute but the ultimate decision is still mine.
     
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  9. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Contributor

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    It's not an either or, I believe in a combination of the two. You control what you can control, but there are also things such as luck, timing, external factors such as weather, other people's hidden agendas, etc. .

    I used to believe there was no such thing as "luck" and that one creates one's own luck. Then I got hit with a chronic illness even though I lived an extremely healthy lifestyle and did all the "right" things. ETA: I don't believe for a second that "bad luck" was my fault, so I can't take credit for all the good luck, either. But it's not all out of my hands, either.
     
  10. izzybot

    izzybot (unspecified) Contributor

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    I think that 'destiny' is a somewhat loaded term -- I would say that my future is a combination of in my hands (the choices I make and how they come back to me) and at the whim of chance (the genetic lottery, whether I get struck by lightning ten minutes from now).

    It actually really stresses me out to think about every little factor that contributes to my future, so many of which I have no awareness of or control over. If I could believe in destiny I'd probably have a lot less anxiety, hahah.
     
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  11. Alastair Woodcock

    Alastair Woodcock Active Member

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    The definition that comes up in Google is: the events that will necessarily happen to a particular person or thing in the future.

    Not sure I'd include the word 'necessarily' as that makes it sound almost pre-determined, when randomness/chance play a part.
     
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  12. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    I tend to the view that I can't control what happens to me but I can control how I react to it
     
  13. Tenderiser

    Tenderiser Not a man or BayView

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    I don't believe anybody has a destiny. My future will be forged by a combination of my actions and external influences: for example, I can choose to apply for a job but I can't choose for the company to hire me.
     
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  14. 123456789

    123456789 Contributor Contributor

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    I thought destiny by definition was not something you could control?
     
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  15. GlitterRain7

    GlitterRain7 Galaxy Girl Contributor

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    I voted that it's in my hands because I feel like I have to choose to go after something *or not* in order for it to happen. It's not like BAM my finished novel is going to fall into my lap right now. I have to keep working on it. Likewise, if I don't keep working on it, it won't happen because how can I write a novel if I'm not writing it?
    A little part of me feels like some parts of it are out of my control though. For example, I was set on going to a college near where I live after I graduate. But no, they got rid of the program I was going to do. Now I have to go somewhere else. So I guess I was never meant to go there?
     
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  16. Rosacrvx

    Rosacrvx Contributor Contributor

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    Out of my control.

    I like that saying: a man makes plans and God laughs.


    It apparently says a lot about you and your personality.

    And your culture/age/circumstances, etc.
     
  17. Iain Sparrow

    Iain Sparrow Banned Contributor

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    That statement makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
    Every move we make is made for us, for Quantum Physics steals from us the majesty of human free will. We are little better than the pets we keep. My cat sits on the end of my desk; perhaps she knows I'm struggling with a tricky paragraph I'd very much like to finish with before lunch, or she'd like me to scratch her head? I'll scratch her head. I'll break for lunch a bit early, I think.
     
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  18. Albeit

    Albeit Active Member

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    This has helped me so much. I hate it, but I have had to face it. Listen closely and take responsibility for your existence.

    We had no say into coming into being, since there was no "I" to choose it. However, we do have the splendid counter force to end it whenever we choose.


     
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  19. TWErvin2

    TWErvin2 Contributor Contributor

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    While a person has control over their actions, there are always outside influences that are beyond their control. In those, they respond and react rather than control. So really the either/or question is flawed as there is a spectrum of control (fully within a person's control to fully beyond a person's control) of destiny.
     
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  20. T_L_K

    T_L_K Senior Member

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    I thought destiny by definition was a destination you were designed or somehow expected to reach.
     
  21. jannert

    jannert Retired Mod Supporter Contributor

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    Yeah, that's my general take on it as well. I think 'destiny' does put some things in your path, and it's up to you to skirt around them or take them up. You often look back on these as 'pivotal moments.' Moments you're glad you did what you did, or regret what you did, or regret that you didn't take a chance. But I think it's pretty silly to think you can make anything happen that you want to. You can certainly try, but life doesn't hand you a magic wand. Nor the wisdom to know ahead of time what will be for the best. "Be careful what you wish for."

    I don't think you create your destiny yourself. Nor do I believe you're in the hands of some being who controls your destiny instead. We are infinitesimally small on the face of the Universe ...even on the face of the Earth. So it's sensible to think we'll get caught up in some events and situations that are beyond our control.

    How we face, ignore or handle our opportunities and challenges is something we can control, as long as we are IN control of our own actions and minds. I believe our actions do have an impact on how our lives turn out—but other things factor in as well. As @Tenderiser says, you can choose to apply for a particular job; you can choose to do your best to get an interview and to make it count. However, you can't control the decision they make ...which might actually have nothing to do with you at all. (Legally, they have to go through the motions of hiring, but in fact the boss has already told them they'd 'better' hire his nephew.) You can direct yourself towards a goal and do your utmost to achieve it, but you can't 'control' the process and the outcome.
     
    Last edited: Apr 7, 2018
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  22. T_L_K

    T_L_K Senior Member

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    ... Sorry. :whistle:
     
  23. T_L_K

    T_L_K Senior Member

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    I voted "in my own hands" because like others I'm of the view that the way you respond to events and situations in your life often plays a very important part in whatever follows. I want to think that no one who's voted the same is silly enough to think they can make anything happen that they want to and can control present and future events, and I think anyone who does would probably need to be placed under psychiatric care.

    As the replies so far show someone's interpretation of destiny and how much or not they're in control of it is often intricately linked to their stance on the greater questions, if I'm allowed to use this term, which is what piqued my interest.
     
  24. minstrel

    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Supporter Contributor

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    I aim myself and release the bowstring. Where I end up depends largely on the weather.
     
  25. Steerpike

    Steerpike Felis amatus Contributor

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    If it’s within your own control is it really “destiny?” Isn’t that kind of the opposite of destiny?

    ETA: never mind I should have read all the responses first!
     
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