Who's Your Favorite Comedian?

Discussion in 'Entertainment' started by Masked Mole, May 31, 2015.

  1. Earp

    Earp Copy That Contributor

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    SISTER JOAN

    BY PAUL GILMARTIN



    Sister Joan, age 54, ignores the desert sun,
    The stranded church bus smoking, no sign of anyone.
    Buzzards circle overhead, panic starts to set.
    The kids are getting restless, her habit soaked with sweat.
    The minutes become hours, she wobbles in the heat.
    Then, a distant engine roars, approaching from the East.
    She squints through horn-rimmed glasses, her pure heart skips a beat.
    Snake McGinty's Harley Hog, parts the dusty heat.
    Black leather-clad from head to toe, his eyelids barely open,
    Sister Joan says, "Holy Ghost, please tell me that you're joking."
    He parks his bike, stands six foot four, then gives her a nod.
    Through leather pants his manhood shows, she rolls her eyes at God.
    "Havin' trouble?", he barely mumbles. "Yes sir", she replies.
    He pops the hood, takes off his shirt, she covers up her eyes.
    "Kids", she says, "Back on the bus. Everyone be good."
    Her fingers part, her eyes take in his reflection off the hood.
    She grips her rosary tight with guilt and stares down at her socks.
    Her mind protects her vows with God, but her body picks the lock.
    He bends to check the fan belt, her nipples say, "Hello".
    Her eyes climb up his leather chaps like a snail with vertigo.
    She shuts her eyes and shakes her head, her legs start feeling funny.
    "Lord", she says, "For work like this, I'm making shitty money."
    He shuts the hood, "My name is Snake, I'm wanted in five states."
    She said, "Snake you're my forbidden fruit, and I need a little taste."
    The kids look on in disbelief. The kiss is slow, then faster.
    Cheering rocks the school bus, till she says "Snake let's ditch these bastards.
    As they left, the kids screamed "No", she turned around and waved.
    Her next confession killed a priest and lasted seven days.
    For years the scandal rocked the church, but she regained their trust.
    She still teaches Sunday school, but she doesn't drive the bus.
     
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  2. tdk321

    tdk321 Member

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    One of those candidates, whom if they hadn't found comedy would have ended up in max security pent.
     
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  3. Seven Crowns

    Seven Crowns Contributor Contributor

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    Bill Burr and Kevin Hart are so damn funny. Those are my favorite current day guys.

    My favorite of all time is Mitch Hedberg. His routine's like a 1000 punchlines delivered by an insecure stoner.

     
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  4. Bobby Burrows

    Bobby Burrows Contributor Contributor

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    Love Bill Hicks

    [​IMG]
     
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  5. Alan Aspie

    Alan Aspie Stubborn Finnsperger Contributor

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  6. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Supporter Contributor

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    Too many to mention, but the ones that make me stop what I'm doing to watch when I stumble on one of their routines continue to be Chris Rock and Robin Williams.

    ETA: Russell Brand, too.
     
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2019
  7. John Calligan

    John Calligan Contributor Contributor

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    Louie C.K.


    j/k


    I really love this woman:

     
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  8. matwoolf

    matwoolf Contributor Contributor

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    He/she is funnyish. The character lampoons progressive perspectives. But almost inevitably attracts a nasty crowd. Sure, it's funny when she triggers some 'rationalist.'
    ..

    'Bill Hicks,' yawn, rite of passage, no offense.

    ..

    I worked in a comedy club. It ruined 'stand up' for me. I don't enjoy it.
     
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  9. EBohio

    EBohio Banned

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    I'm starting to like Sebastian Maniscalco
     
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  10. StaggeringBlow

    StaggeringBlow Member

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    I was going to add Gaffigan. My current favorite
     
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  11. Kinzvlle

    Kinzvlle At the bottom of a pit Contributor

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    Russel Howard is a great British comic, who has a general positivity and good energy trys to bring to his shows and his stand up.



    Ken Jeong is great, funny as heck and his backgrounds just interesting.

    Should be working on my own comedy instead of watching these. :D
     
  12. Albaman

    Albaman Member

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    Billy Connolly. Obviously.
     
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  13. Kinzvlle

    Kinzvlle At the bottom of a pit Contributor

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  14. Kinzvlle

    Kinzvlle At the bottom of a pit Contributor

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    Maybe it`s just my love of puppets but this had me cracking up.

     
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  15. Reece

    Reece Senior Member

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    Mitch and Chappelle. Mitch is my cat's middle name.
     
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  16. JLT

    JLT Contributor Contributor

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    Who remembers Victor Borge? His humor crossed boundaries of culture and language.

    And, while we're skewering classical music, I'll put in a word for Anna Russell. Her condensation of the Ring Cycle into twenty minutes is a classic.

    And now that I'm down this road, there's Peter Schickele with his PDQ Bach oeuvre. The more you know about classical music, the funnier it is.
     
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  17. Ruckus

    Ruckus Banned

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    My favorite Comic is definitly Bill Hicks. Sad how he pass away way to early in life. He was one of the best Even to this day when I am feeling low I watch him for a while and my mood changes from bad to better to hovering just below giddy.
     
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  18. ugly henry

    ugly henry Member

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    Steve Martin. The Best ever.
    George Carlin. I would put him as best if it weren't for the fact he lost his comedy way. I remember an interview he did where he said he had an epiphany. He realized that he had always been an entertainer who wrote his own material but now saw that he was a writer who performed his own material. After that he was just an angry old man.
    Bob Newhart
    Eddie Murphy
    Bill Hicks
    Bill Cosby (when he still did stand up)
    Phillis Diller
    I do not think CK Lewis is funny at all
     
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  19. flawed personality

    flawed personality Human Being Contributor

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    Michael McIntyre, Dylan Moran, Bill Bailey, Jon Richardson, Russell Howard, Shappi Khorsandi, Sarah Millican, Tim Minchin, Jo Brand. There's probably others.
     
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  20. Kinzvlle

    Kinzvlle At the bottom of a pit Contributor

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    Russel Howards great, I frequented a different online forum in high school where some of the British members turned me onto his Good News show. Fell in love and been following him ever since. Loving his new show should be putting the newest episode up to youtube tomorrow excited for that. I know from the comment section that those videos tend to get region locked around the UK (probably licensing) but it`s great that he does that for his non-UK fans.
     
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  21. jannert

    jannert Who? Whooo? Staff Supporter Contributor

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    I'm quite fond of Kevin Bridges at the moment, but there are lots and LOTS of very funny comedians here in the UK just now.

     
    Last edited: Feb 28, 2019
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  22. XRD_author

    XRD_author Banned

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    Carol Burnett
     
  23. jannert

    jannert Who? Whooo? Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Oh, forgot Michael McIntyre. Hilarious.
     
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  24. ugly henry

    ugly henry Member

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    Listen to this person.
    I posted earlier that among my favorites was Phyllis Diller and while true I only included her because I was looking for a female representation from those early years. To my embarrasment I completely forgot about the queens of comedy, Carol Burnett, Mary Tyler Moore, Lucille Ball (not a lot of stand-up there but some of the funniest) I'm sure there's a few others.
     
  25. paperbackwriter

    paperbackwriter Banned Contributor

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    God.
    He created me whilst saying to the angels:
    " i just want see what happens when you send a child on adult errands. should be prime time slapstick!"
     

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