Why do they always ...

Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by cutecat22, Apr 27, 2014.

  1. Andrae Smith

    Andrae Smith Bestselling Author|Editor|Writing Coach Contributor

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    Of course, of course. I wouldn't want to be reported for pollution and toxic dumping in a residential area. (As a side note, I appreciate the fact that you are environmentally conscious... or were you just saying that? o_O)
     
  2. minstrel

    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Supporter Contributor

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    I actually really am. And I was saying that! :)
     
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  3. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    Okay, I might be admitting to liking some bad movies here, but I actually found Event Horizon kind of enjoyable if I filtered out some of the stupid / cheesy stuff. I mean, the movie had an actual wave of blood, so it can't be all bad! :D

    I do admit it had plenty of dumbdumb moments and lots of cheese, and I do hate it when movies (or books, btw) clearly have potential, but then they muck it up (*cough* Prometheus *cough*), which seems to be the norm rather than the exception.

    Then again, @KaTrian has observed that I do have a highly developed crap filter: I notice some dumb / corny element in a movie / book / TV show, acknowledge its existence, and from there on filter it out so I can enjoy the rest of it.
    It becomes problematic only when there's nothing left after the filtering process or when there's so much crap / the turds are so big that the filters get clogged.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2014
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  4. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    This happened to me with the first Alien film. What is probably the most perfect of all sci-fi horror films even 35 years after its first release, is marred by one little flaw that I obsessed over for like 10 minutes and then let go. The creature is born and grows to the size of a very large human in like a day (thermodynamics out the window) and all without having eaten any of them yet (conservation of mass follows out the same window)
     
  5. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    @Wreybies, how do you know baby aliens (after they leave the host's body) don't feed on space ship parts, huh?
     
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  6. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Because why would it bother to chomp the humans? Humans are mean and fight back and make flamethrowers out of spare mining junk lying around. Insulation and packing material just passively lets you eat it, like grass.

    Also, this still doesn't get around thermodynamics. You can't convert that much not-Alien into Alien in a day without astounding amounts of energy being released. It would blow up the ship.

    So there, smartypants. :p :D
     
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  7. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    That's why I said baby alien! It's obvious its diet changes into humans once it goes through puberty. :rolleyes:

    And as for that thermowachumacallit, well... well... oh, shut up. :mad:
     
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  8. minstrel

    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Supporter Contributor

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    Don't get me started on Prometheus.

    Okay, you did. :p

    In what universe of stupidity does some incredibly rich guy mount a massive interstellar expedition to solve the mystery of the origins of human life at a cost of a trillion dollars without telling anybody on the expedition what they're supposed to be doing? Gawd!! These guys wake up from hypersleep (or whatever they called it) at the planet so many light-years from Earth, and that's the time they introduce themselves? "Hi, I'm Fred. I'm a geologist." "Oh, good to meet you. I'm Mary, I'm a biologist." That sort of thing. These BOOBS set out from Earth with no idea of where they were going, no idea of what they were supposed to do when they got there, and no idea of who they were even working for!!!!!! How do you sign a contract like that? "We're not going to tell you where you're going or what you're supposed to do. Sign here."

    Jeez.

    Uz.

    Christ.

    Okay, I'm cutting my rant short. But I have lots more in reserve... don't push me!

    /rant
     
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  9. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    I'd like to hear more of your ranting on Prometheus, @minstrel. Might give me ideas of what not to do with my (and @KaTrian's) own sci-fi piece. Sorry, everyone! :p
     
  10. minstrel

    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Supporter Contributor

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    Dude, buy me a beer or three. I wish there was a pub where we could meet without spending tons on plane fare. I'd bring my roomie, who talks like Niagara Falls, and agrees with me about Prometheus. You will need ear surgery afterwards. :D
     
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  11. Smoke Z

    Smoke Z Active Member

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    I'm thinking conservation of detail... should have added an extra 30 minutes of BORING to the movie for them to take care of paperwork and introduce themselves to each other...

    Haven't seen Prometheus, and it's not on Netflix.

    (Big rant about not being able to enjoy movies because 3d glasses give me headaches.)
     
  12. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    But they go out of their way in the film to mention the fact that they don't know the mission, that only a few were hired with knowledge of where they were going. They could have left that whole bit out and we would have all assumed that they were hired under a normal, expected paradigm.

    ETA: And the mention is like 20 seconds of the film. Totally unneeded.
     
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  13. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    Aw crud. Oh well, I'll fly you guys over when I can change my name to Mr. Rich & Famous Writer With Realized Delusions of Grandeur.

    As for the topic, and this applies to all action-y genres: I wish they'd make folks stop dropping their gear whenever a freakin' mosquito farts or something else surprising happens. I mean, just today I watched a TV show where a dude dropped his weapon when he was attacked. I've also seen a character drop his flashlight (which, of course, broke despite today's tactical practical aircraft aluminum-bodied LED flashlights) when he heard a loud noise within the building.
    Seriously? I get it that it's possible, but it's such a common trope you'd think soldiers in Iraq (or wherever they are today) were dropping their rifles every three seconds.

    Also, how come so many people supposedly scream / gasp / whimper or have difficulties holding it back while they're hiding under the bed / around the corner / wherever and see someone get killed or hurt?
    Often they don't even see anyone get hurt, they just see the killer / baddie walk around the room and still they have trouble staying quiet. What gives?

    I get it if it's an accident about to happen, e.g. a guy is walking down the street, you see a car lose control and head right at him, and then scream at him to get out of the way or some such, but when you know making noise will get you killed? Is it really such an uncontrollable compulsion?
     
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  14. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    @T.Trian, not to keep beating the crap out of Prometheus, but...

    This makes me think of another eyerolling moment in many films. At the end-ish of Prometheus when the Engineer ship falls back out of the sky, hits (but doesn't break :rolleyes:) and starts rolling to one side, Charlize Theron does the classic goof of running in the same direction as the thing is rolling. I'm like, to the side! To the side! Make a sharp left now or else you deserve to be crushed for being stupid!
     
  15. minstrel

    minstrel Leader of the Insquirrelgency Supporter Contributor

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    I have seen the SO MANY TIMES!!! Just take a right, you damn stupid fool! Why are you running to exactly the point where you will be crushed?

    Not to bend the thread too far, but have you seen the Agatha Christie movie Ten Little Indians? People are being murdered, yet every night, they all go to their own individual defenseless bedrooms, with nobody else around, with no protection, etc. It's dumb. Every night, they say, "Terrible things are going on here, Ann. People are being murdered in the night! Oh well, go to your bedroom all by yourself and have a good sleep!" You'd think that they'd get together and stand watch to defend each other and find out who's doing the murdering, but no. They just say goodnight, leave each other alone - ALONE WITH A MURDERER PROWLING AROUND - and wonder why someone else is dead the next morning. WTF?
     
  16. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    One last thing on Prometheus and then I swear I'm done... until tomorrow. :p

    French lady said ~

    "Can we please plug the dinglehopper into the decapitated Engineer skull? I think we can trick the nervous system into believing it's still alive."

    Scottish lady should have said ~

    "Dearie, did you not hear me in the tunnel? I said it were two thousand years old. Are ya' daft? It's a bloody mummy head. It's alien jerky on a stick. It's a wee bit'a rawhide stuck to a bone. THERE'S NOTHING TO TRICK AFTER 2000 YEARS!"

    Ok. Done for now. ;)
     
  17. TheApprentice

    TheApprentice Senior Member

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    How about a horror where the victims are actually smart and knowledgeable in self defense to some degree...but the killer is smarter and a couple steps ahead of them every time? And at the end, it turned out that all the victims who had died were the lucky ones, and the survivor's fate was unending torture?
     
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  18. jannert

    jannert Retired Mod Supporter Contributor

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    And yet, surprisingly, all these daft ideas sold.

    Writers wrote them. Somebody bought them.

    Somebody bought them and made them into a movie that cost a packet to put together.

    Makes you wonder why we try...? The lowest common denominator seems to win more often than not, these days.

    Just churn out shit, hand it to Hollywood, sit back, and watch that ol' money roll in...
     
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2014
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  19. T.Trian

    T.Trian Overly Pompous Bastard Supporter Contributor

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    Yet another classic example of where the author is just being lazy, Christie or not: she made the characters so incredibly stupid, the killer's job so incredibly easy, and all as a cheap way to create "suspense," but all she's really doing is treating the readers / audience like idiots. Granted, many are, but many are not. Give us a little credit.

    That's why Zombieland was so refreshing: the characters actually avoided a lot of those dumb mistakes every other writer insists on putting in just for cheap thrills. Okay, it wasn't a perfect example, but considering its rivals, a pretty good one when it comes to suspense done right (or at least better).
     
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  20. Bryan Romer

    Bryan Romer Contributor Contributor

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    Ghosts of Mars - John Carpenter film.
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0228333/
     
  21. cutecat22

    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    I agree - I watched Prometheus a couple of times and even I though it stank! It left me with more questions than answers. In fact, it left me scratching my head.
     
  22. cutecat22

    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    I am so glad I wasn't the only one shouting "HOW THICK ARE YOU?!" at the TV ...
     
  23. cutecat22

    cutecat22 The Strange One Contributor

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    seen it - wasted an hour and a half of my life!
     
  24. MilesTro

    MilesTro Senior Member

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    The villain becomes the victim instead. He thinks the teenagers he desire to kill are helpless stupid kids. But the teenagers are serial killers too. When they meet the killer, they turn the tables on him. It would make a great twist near the end.
     
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  25. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Wait, is this the one where some dude randomly and stupidly cuts off his own thumb at one point and stars a very young Ice Cube?
     

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