1. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    Living with Failure

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by tbeverley, Nov 27, 2009.

    Does anyone else feel like their life began well but came to nothing?
     
  2. Ashleigh

    Ashleigh Contributor Contributor

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    This sounds like a jolly thread!
     
  3. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    :)

    It's the holidays.
     
  4. Ashleigh

    Ashleigh Contributor Contributor

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    Then maybe you should go and ask Tiny Tim and the other Cratchits?
     
  5. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    Who are they? Isn't Cratchit the guy from A Christmas Carol? Scrooge Mc. Duck and the Cratchits?
     
  6. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    No.

    And my life has taken me down some very, very, very rough streets.

    And still the answer is no.

    I have gotten off track for years.

    And still the answer is no.

    As long as you are drawing breath, you can always, always, always make the choice to get things back on track.

    Always.

    The choice may well not be easy. In fact, if you find yourself in a position to have to make choices to get things back on track, it's pretty much guaranteed that the choice won't be easy.

    Still, it is your choice.
     
  7. NaCl

    NaCl Contributor Contributor

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    No. My life has been, and continues to be, a never ending adventure. Some paths have been difficult. Others have been a thrill. It's not the results that I enjoy. It's the challenge, as it unfolds, that keeps me excited. I wish I could live forever.
     
  8. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    You could make that a good poem:

    No. And my life has taken me down some very, very, very
    rough streets. And still the answer is no. I have gotten off track
    for years. And still the answer is no. As long as you are drawing breath,
    you can always, always, always make the choice
    to get things back on track.
     
  9. jlauren

    jlauren New Member

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    I wouldn't say my life has 'come to nothing', but it certainly took a turn somewhere that I wasn't expecting. Honestly, from the time I got married (I was 20...I know, sooo young) to now, four years later, I can't really say what happened. It feels like those years were a curve ball and now I'm left a little dazed..haha.

    The person I am now is nothing like the person I thought I would be at this age....but then again, isn't that the point of life?

    Someone told me this once when I cried to them about wanting my life back, or wanting it to start - "Your life has already begun...you're in it. Stop thinking that you're not living your life, because whose life do you think this is? Whether you like it or not, it doesn't matter, it's still yours." I still think about that to this day.
     
  10. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    I've always wanted to get somewhere, but there's been nowhere to get. It's a lot like that disconnected feeling. I want...something. Excitement fills the role for a while. People fill the role for a while. Experience fills it. But in the end, I don't feel like I've got that something I wanted. It's sort of that hungry void.

    I met this brilliant guy once who remarked, "I'm sick of this constant need to be entertained."

    I suspect nothing ever fills the void but distraction. Half the time we're told that distraction is bad. But when you're not distracted by something, what is there?
     
  11. jlauren

    jlauren New Member

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    Well, I know the answer to this, and it's something that I have trouble coming to terms with often. It's the age-old struggle. I understand why we have a void, and why it needs to be filled and what fills it....there's only ever one answer. It's a hard one to swallow though.
     
  12. TimAyro

    TimAyro New Member

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    My life seems like it's nothing right now but I feel like all that will change when I start college. I'm just like, in a neutral area right now. I don't do much other than focus on my personality, interests, etc.
     
  13. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    Same. All my projects have petered out.
     
  14. jlauren

    jlauren New Member

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    Yeah, I find that when I'm not working full days (like right now) I tend to be worse. There's too much time to do nothing....and focus on myself. And when you bum around with no focus or nothing driving you, it just means you have more time to think...which can be a hazard :p
     
  15. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    Think it's time to start a novel.
     
  16. jlauren

    jlauren New Member

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    Finish a novel more like it. It's the hardest thing I've ever attempted to do really. My characters are becoming a pain in the ass though....they keep me awake at night and bug me with all their problems.

    * I'm the writer....I'm supposed to control you, damn it.*
     
  17. Mercurial

    Mercurial Contributor Contributor

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    Sometimes it feels that way, but I'm still young. I'm working very hard to make sure that it doesnt end up in failure, setting my goals probably unrealistically high, because you know the cliche, shoot for the moon and land among the stars.

    It's foolish to think you can have all of the good and none of the bad and miserably wrong to assume you can have all of the bad and none of the good. Sometimes the scales tip one way or the other, but they even out eventually, with some effort.

    As far as living with failure goes in general, I muck up every day, and sure, it upsets me. But as cliche as it sounds, it really isnt the mistakes that define you --it's how you react to them. :)
     
  18. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I think you also have to decide what happiness means to you.

    My brother is significantly more affluent than I am. Is he happier?

    I don't think so.

    I very much enjoy doing what I do for a living because it interests me, even tho it is
    not the kind of work that will ever, ever make me rich.

    And I have a good life.

    Others may have "more", but does that really mean better?
     
  19. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    Finishing would be a start.

    Yeah, my character is always me. And that's to say that I'm boring, uneventful, and overly morbid. I don't even want to read about me. When I start something new, it's always about someone else, but over time that someone begins to look more and more like me, and it's just some self-heroism thing in which I make myself feel better by writing about how great this other guy is. When that other guy is just becoming me.

    Third person might work. Or just finding a way to not put myself into my novel ever time. Marty Sue - he's the perfect representation of oneself.
     
  20. TimAyro

    TimAyro New Member

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    That's what I have been doing lately. I bum around. I am moving to California from all the way on the east coast in about 2 months. Spice up my life, and go to a place I feel I was always meant to be.

    So in the mean time, I work on the skills I need to get a nice job and the jobs I want in CA.
     
  21. tbeverley

    tbeverley New Member

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    I miss California. It's my home. Grew up there. I'm looking into Portland myself. I used to live there. Oregon has a great sky. Very watery blue. Or Arizona.

    How come you're leaving the east coast?
     
  22. TimAyro

    TimAyro New Member

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    I never liked the east coast. I was born in Hawaii. I'm a west coast kid. WAY west coast. Mom and I moved out here when I was younger because of my parents divorce. I loathe most of the east coast, except NYC! =D

    Always wanted to be involved in movies one way or another, and if you want that, best place to be is in California.

    ...and I hate winter and snow.
     
  23. madhoca

    madhoca Contributor Contributor

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    Anyone who feels their life has come to nothing--well, if you're still breathing, you still have the chance to achieve something. Nothing's over til it ends. My friend became very well-known over the last 10 years, and is now reaching millionaire status as an artist--in his seventies.

    I suggest anyone who thinks they have failed in life watches the youtube clip by Nick Vujicic, a guy who was born with no limbs.

    Alternatively, you can just continue to store up that angst and use it in your writing!
     
  24. TimAyro

    TimAyro New Member

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    That's exactly how I feel. Life may be boring at times, but god or no god, we're all here for some reason.
     
  25. LadyLazarus

    LadyLazarus New Member

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    No. Well, yes. But then I remind myself of the fact that I'm only sixteen and for me to tar the rest of my life with the same brush as it's already been tarred with, well, then it's my fault. And I hate things being my fault. So I buck up my ideas, I volunteer, I write. I pick a new hobby.

    Life is pretty much what you make it. Really. Not what it makes you.
     

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