Another thread got me to thinking about show versus tell. The OP asked about how to strengthen this sentence in relation to it being passive: I hope you don't mind me quoting you, if so let me know. I suggested showing this as an action rather than telling how his character felt, basically not answering his question and going off topic. Sorry man. :redface: But he got very good answers to his question so to keep from going off topic further and saying "Hi Jack!" I thought I would continue my view on the sentence here. I suggested: Any thoughts or suggestions? I tend to be action oriented in my stories and avoid telling when at all possible. But Cogito and Etan Isar's points really clicked with me and I feel that I could improve my writing by extending myself more. When I describe anything, I tend to do it as an action and I realize this isn't always the best way to do it.