Viewing blog entries in category: Letters from the Heart
Today, your name is "girl in mirror," and I am so happy that you are finally smiling when you look back...but now I am disappointed.
You know very well where this sudden spark of confidence is coming from, and that it is only a mask. I know that you know that there is fear lurking under that mask, and it is more than a Papercut(Linkin Park). Why are you so afraid of that damned debilitating voice, the one wriggling 'round under your skin? Is it really that scary? Coz, little ole me, the more powerful voice stuck in your head, is going to deal with the Voice downstairs pretty fugging soon if it doesn't shut its mouth immediately.
I don't like htis, I don't like it at all. No, I don't want you to be the Super Studious Girl you once were, she was an uptight bitch, and we hated each other. What I want, what you need, is to be YOU. Yeah, Y-O-U, the girl that's going to win over her life and be damned if it'll be ripped from her. What we need is for you to walk like you believe in yourself, write like you know you have potential, play like the game pumps your blood through your veins, and deal with school like it's your good ole friend and not your estranged lover.
Your better than this girl you've been of late. But, her happiness can be yours too. Grab that happiness by the hand and rip it away from that moodiness and then sit your ass down and do some work. Also, please (oh GAWD PLEASE!) remember that just because a university said, "We'd love it if you attended, we accept you," it does not mean that it is an unconditional relationship, you're entering into a deal. In case you have miraculously forgotten, the deal is as follows:
In exchange for you keeping up your grades at your current institution of learning, there will be a spot waiting for you at their institute of higher learning.
Once there, in exchange for you keeping up your grades and, hopefully, particicpating in campus and student life activiteis and events, there will continue to be a spot with your name on it at the institution.
See? It's all conditional. Don't be a dumbass and forget that!!! I mean it! I control your feet, I will kick your arse!
Anywho, I love you, you love you, and at the moment...there's an odd line of guys who seem to really like you...and yeah, you're not sure that a certain person is in that line, but loves come and go, your knowledge follows you to the grave.
You have a lot of time and potential, but that doesn't mean you should be squandering either. And, until you realize this, I'll be thrashing my head against our little glass closet.
Please, I need asprin,