Gluttons for punishment?

Really stuck on a story. False starts and perplexity about where to take it. Emailed my sister about my frustrations. "Never had so much trouble with a story," I wrote.

She emailed back, "if something is causing me trouble ... I'd skip it. Who needs aggravation? Not me. You?"

How would you answer if someone said that to you?

 

I am reminded about the quote from Flannery O'Connor:

“Writing a novel is a terrible experience, during which the hair often falls out and the teeth decay. I'm always irritated by people who imply that writing fiction is an escape from reality. It is a plunge into reality and it's very shocking to the system.”

 

i tend to skip parts/scenes that are giving me trouble and come back to it later. Even if it is the beginning of a story. I often cant figure out how to start a story so i just sart writing the first scene that comes to mind when thinking about it and work backward from there.

 

But you always come back?

 

yep.
sometimes it takes writing out of sequential order to sort out scenes im stuck on

 

Xioc advised me to work on the ending, and work backwards on my thread, what's next?

 

Here is how: everything you do in this world, without exception, will cause you trouble of varying degree. Therefore, you can't avoid everything. The question then becomes, do you want to put in the effort towards that trouble? Is it worth to put effort towards that trouble, for you personally? If so, then yes, you might just need that aggravation. Because it is exactly as they say, no pain, no gain.

I assure you that you're not alone, I do this because I think it's worth the trouble. If I didn't, I'd have quit long ago, and saved myself two whole summers of endless effort and mind-bending frustration of unbelievable degree.

I've talked about this here before, my first project wasn't written with a process. It was written with brute-force. It was more challenge than enjoyment, but I stuck with it because I wanted to see it through the end. I wanted to see my story take shape and come to life, I wanted to do what all these great writers were doing.

When, after 8 drafts, I read the epilogue, I almost cried. It wasn't perfect but I had done something. It felt like I got some things right, it felt like all of my effort paid off. I still remember that feeling, and while nobody has read that project, I 100% feel that it was worth the summers I lost. It was very important experience gained.

That said, it's also important to take care of yourself. It's easy to loose yourself in the effort and forget to do that, there are times when you must take a break (no matter how long) and just have your mind rewind its gears. Not doing that will just result in burn-out and inefficiency... as I have discovered. I suspect that this is why your sister said that, she's probably worried.

You're a great writer, don't forget that just because something isn't going well. You'll get there with enough time and effort!

 

That break is part of the reason working on a different section works. Jumping to the end and working backwards gets you to the point you are writing a bridge from the problem spot to where you have gotten working backwards. Building that bridge is easier than brute forcing through the problem.

 

Thanks so much for the thoughtful reply. I did tell her that the aggravation is worth it to get that completed story. But you're right - she does worry about me!

But what she said really go me thinking. Non-writers can't understand that particular sense of accomplishment that comes with a story you are proud of.

Honestly, all my stories cause me frustration. I literally spend days just thinking about how a story should go. A touch of madness? Somewhat obsessional? Maybe! But that is what it takes.

And yes, thanks, I am taking care of myself. I went swimming today after missing two days in a row. I really missed it and omg I loved my time in the pool.

 

It's Xoic. Rhymes with Stoic, and sounds like the end of cenozoic or mesozoic. In fact my blog is called "Steaming Mess-O-Xoic". Damn, I just wrote it and mentally pronounced it so many times it lost all meaning. If it ever had any... What a strange pseudo-word.

 

I've just come to the conclusion, from reading parts of my story after a few weeks away from it, that this approach isn't working at all. It has several problems. I now believe I need to go back to a short stories format and lose the "Crossed with Stand By Me" aspect. It shouldn't try to be a poignant coming-of-age story, that's messing it up. It's a freaking action/adventure story, on the surface anyway, that actually develops some psychological depth as it moves forward. And as much as I learned about Ronnie's character by starting it with him hanging out with Cody, I need to change it yet again.

I do love these big projects that you have to scrap and re-start over and over again, that are absolute labors of love. They seem to be where I do the majority of my learning.

 

I think it's partly because I'm learning so much from being here and from all the books I've been reading about story etc, that my ideas are growing as I go forward.

There's an online art teacher named Steve Houston who said your mind is like a bookshelf, with the books representing your current knowledge. Right now you know exactly where every book is and what's in all of them, from long familiarity, but each time you add some new books it messes all that up. Some of them go in between some of the older books, you don't even know where they are anymore, and you're still trying to absorb all this new information. For a good long time everything is in disarray until you get it absorbed and settle in. Then more new books come in and it starts all over again. I find that a very good analogy for the learning process.

 

To me it was always monosyllabic. But your blog title makes sense now.

 

Here's the secret origin story of my name (don't tell anybody ). Just before joining here I watched the entire series of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, marveling at the writing genius of Joss Whedon and company. In the end credits of every eposide (at least in the final few seasons) it says the effects were done by a company called Zoic. It just sounded really cool to me, and it stuck. Plus it rhymes with Stoic. But I definitely can see where, not knowing any of this, it's just a confusing mouthful of alphabet soup.

 

I'd politely say, "That's a thought," and go right on with what I was doing before learning that some people deal with a difficult situtation by immediately throwing in the towel.

I also write out of sequence, so can leave perplexing challenges to compost while I go work elsewhere in my word garden. Long walks with or without the dogs help me ratiocinate, as do any number of tasks that involve physical movement while not fully engaging my brain: embroidery is good, pulling weeds is even better. Driving in traffic is not so good. Sometimes I just stand in my backyard and look at the mountain view as I mull over the conundrum. Other times I sit down and make lists of possible directions to take. Sooner or later, it works itself out in my brain, either arriving by slow degrees or in one big YEE-HAW! moment when everything finally clicks.

 

If I remember right, Isaac Asimov described his urge to disappear into the attic in order to write a compulsion. It really is what it takes, sometimes! But he also turned out a fine man, so he made sure it doesn't take him over!

I did get your name right the first time no problem, maybe the fact that I'm Greek helped cause it just seemed natural to apply Stoic to it.

I'm immune to this lol, you can't mispronounce ps102 because there's not one pronunciation to it! It does stand for Pure Snows, though, if you're curious.

 

Sorry, a touch of dyslexia.

 

And here I thought it stood for "public school" and you were fondly recalling your elementary education in New YOrk City.

 

how has she gotten through life so far, just skipped every difficult thing?

 

Not at all. I've given the wrong impression. She's actually my rock. Was right beside me carrying me through some very difficult times.

But this thread is not about my sister. I am more interested in hearing about your experiences with writing.

 

Frustrations arise when what you're writing isn't true. You don't know where to take it because there is no logical place to take it.

Sometimes you have to back up and find the truth. When what you are writing is true, it pours out of you.

 

I think it's more that our life experience guides us through the scenarios we're engineering, what we write is more or less based on some experience we have embedded at the core of the story. This is basically where the best of writing comes from.

Drawing on those experiences can be hard, sometimes it feels as if you aren't doing them justice, that's the real hard part. I usually feel a "click" when I've finally hit the nail in the head, that's when it all starts to pour out.

But not everyone does this kind of writing, some books are entirely made up. A thriller doesn't need to be real, it just needs to have excellent story-telling to "thrill" you. I've enjoyed such works, though I often forget them, unlike the stories that draw into some truth. What they speak about remains to me. That story you wrote with the clowns did that, for example, I still think about it every now and then.

Naturally, such stories will have more value. The more value something has, the harder it is to obtain.

And when the readers pick it up and feels it, that's the reward, it makes it all very worth it.

 

That's true, but the more you write, the better you become. I think that with enough experience and writing ability, you might be able to achieve more than "personal satisfaction". Maybe not always but... it can happen.

I agree though that writing is tedious, it's very hard to do at all if you care about keeping a standard, but watching my growing library of finished projects makes me a little happier. They are projects I finished despite feeling like giving up hundreds if not thousands of times, they are there because I stood my ground and I finished. They're not perfect, or even good, but they're there.

They also gave me invaluable experience as a writer from overcoming the challenges it took me to write them. I can use that to do even better next time. And well... isn't that a reward on its own?

 

We've all heard it - "Write what you know."

I love that click!!