A Post a Day, post #6

So I messed up my track record for posting each day. I got a little sick, had to cover other sick people's shifts at work along with my own and didn't have time to come a share my writing with the world. I'm back to just doing my assigned shifts now though, still sick, but I should have my free time back at least. Anyway~ I'll share one of the poems that I have posted on this site.

It was for the bi-weekly poetry contest held by morepages. The subject was jealousy, and if you haven't signed up for it yet, you should...

This was my entry

Waking Up
You carried my bags for me on the day we met,
only... I was a little scared by your approach
until I let you in my little world, showing me I was blind.

Arms and mind open, you readily embraced me:
receiving my whole heart, my body and my soul.
Enjoying the budding blossoms of our new love together, my blue eyes opening.

Always you are kind to me, no matter what I do.
Loving me when I am ugly and overwhelmed,
loving me when I am not.

Many times now, have you carried my bags for me.
Inspecting their contents: my bread and cheese; my milk and eggs.
Never noticing, until today, the young cashier that always checks us out.
Eyes, moving over what is mine to see.


This was actually a fun poem to design. I've been spending a lot of time with some women's studies majors and I think I made a good depiction of a female character, mbti INFP if you're curious. I also tried to make the gender slightly vague, so as to give the reader the ability to substitute the character in the poem with themselves or someone they know. I use the motif of eye, specifically eyes opening, to illustrate the progression of my character's jealousy. Going from being unable to see, to noticing everything around them. I also divided the stanza's into four groups on purpose.

The first letters of each stanza spell a word, so the poem says, "You are all mine" which I thought gives the poem a sense of hidden intent, or secret nature to the character. Anyway, let me know what you think~

I'll try to keep my posting more regular now also

bi-weekly poetry contest~
http://www.writingforums.org/threads/bi-weekly-poetry-contest-239-september-1-jealousy-not-envy.127143/