Breaking free of the chrystalis.

  1. Pardon the discombobulated, uneditted ramblings; I'm trying to make sense of everything.

    Within the past few months, I have met some of the most extraordinary people, many I now consider my closest of friends. Philosophers, philanthropists, geniuses, priests... They have shaped my life in ways I never thought possible. I shant go into detail, but the before and after of my life after meeting these pivotal people is drastic. I'm happier, thinner, smarter, more aware, and more open-minded.
    I'm still nowhere near the person I want to be, but I'm lightyears closer.

    Only months ago I was a caterpillar; I was ignorant, ugly (inside -and- out), depressed... I'm not quite that effervescent butterfly in my profile photo, but I'm in metamorphosis, trying to break free of my chrystalis.

    I'm rewiring my mind, trying to grasp at what is right in front of me.

    One person in particular has shaped my views on -everything- drastically, and he is quickly becoming one of the most important people in my life; he already knows that he is my hero. He's saved my life, kept me on the right track. Sometimes I feel like he knows me better than I do.
    I feel like I know what it was like back in the days of the European Enlightenment... incredible. Suddenly, I am wandering around a whole new world, eyes wide open. Has the world always had so much color?
    As he would put it, my 'little box is finally opening.'

    This has deeply affected my morals, my values.

    Let's start with love, as I can only wrap my mind around one concept at a time.
    What is love? What is the difference between love and care? Is it a necessity in this world? Does love come in different forms, types, kinds, or is there one universal feeling? Think of it like this: is the love you feel for your wife the same love you have for your dog? ...Why? Why not? (Only unto the separatist, separation.) Why are we as humans designed to be monogamic creatures? Is a polyomic person any different? Homosexual, heterosexual, pansexual, transexual...

    More than that, why is the word tossed around so carelessly? It is a constant chant among the school hallways, "Love ya, bitch!" "Oh, you know I love ya." "I -love- this!"
    Does anyone really know what it means?

    What does love feel like? I've had my share of significant others, but I dont think I've ever fallen in love, not yet. I wonder if I will have to experience it before I can define it.

    -D

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