Sometimes you just need to rant...

I'm normally the type of person who can stay happy go-lucky no matter what, but don't we all have our breaking points?

I lost my job 2 months ago. Which alone is upsetting, but then, I got into this new job, at least they said I had gotten in. I wait over the weekend for the call. Nothing. My weekdays are hectic as is, and she only had specific hours. I never got a chance on that Monday. Tuesday, I get into a car accident. The police arrest the woman, and we have to wait with very sore bodies. Our car is towed. We go to the Hospital. We don't get out of the ER until around 3pm that day. It was already too late to call her. The rest of the week becomes a wreck of me staying home and resting. I never called. Neither did she. So, comes the weekend. I rest my body. I'm excited, and I mentally note to myself: Call her on Monday. She'll be in.

Come Monday. I get into another wreck. This time the woman runs from the scene. And I forget to call. Tuesday, I'm a mopey, crabby, paining child that is actually, yes actually, pulled out of bed by her mother and forced to school for the first time in years. I force myself, rather, my mother forces me to go to school. I do. I leave each class early, and zonk out in my professors office. (Because he's freaking awesome. Seriously.) I talk to my professors, they understand. But that didn't stop me from being horribly behind. I missed a week of classes...

And then Wednesday? Idk what day, my mother's car breaks down. Completely. Kaput. She can't be fixed.

My mother is a victim of a horrible divorce, and I live financially independent from her but rely on her for transportation. Nope. No more, and as it comes, they were looking for the money from the accidents from the insurance company to help them. And, I didn't understand what they meant. Apparently, they wanted the bill money sent to them, so that they could put it on the car and have my insurance pay for the medical and they said they could pay w/e they needed on what my insurance would charge.

Well. I think that's cheating... and I told them just to pay the bill. :x They got really mad at me, to the point where my "landlord" tells me she's going to kick me out! Even my own flesh and blood mother is screaming at me about it. Like I did something bad.



So, I did what I had to do. I called my father, whom... I'm still struggling to keep a relationship with in the first place, after said painful divorce. Called the grandparents.

I was forced to ask for help from people that I didn't want to ask for help from. I mean, in general, I'll ask for help when I'm about to fall off the edge of life, but apparently. That's where I am but a situation I can't even control.

So it comes down to it.

Why is my life controlled by the decisions of others?

My mother is supposed to be saving her money. I don't think she could have saved enough to have gotten a car, but maybe we could have had enough that we didn't have to run towards my grandparents for another bailout. I'm SO tired of being controlled by others through THEIR decisions.

Seriously. I just need to be completely independent from that woman. She's bringing me down. She's taking money from my account because she's doing the opposite of saving!!

Gah.

./rant