I think you may have a good story, I think it may be one I'd be interested in reading as I love bleak, dark, hopeless epics, especially fantasy or sci fi. However, I would read this blurb and put the book straight back on the shelf, Specifically, because having read it I really don't care about, or feel affinity with, or am attracted to, anyone or anything mentioned. Legions of Horrors, Homicidal alien civilizations, Apocalypses, have to be doing something to someone or something I'm interested in, otherwise I just don't care about them. Also I find the blurb awkward to read, which is suicide for any book. A first sentence something along the lines of; "A chilling story set in the final days of an apocalyptic thousand year war." would definitely hook me in much better. This is not apparent in the blurb. The blurb does not mention any of these characters. I think people would dive right in if they cared about your protagonists and their situation. Without such an incentive one might just as well watch news footage of Terresa May talking about brexit. I think without a sympathetic protagonist up front and central, including in the blurb, it will be very difficult.
Me thinks you're putting the cart before the horse Is the book already finished? Polished and edited? It seems to me that instead of working on improving your book, you're spending way too much time trying to guess what people will think of it. You're inventing imaginary arguments and retorts to imaginary backlash to the yet unwritten contents of said book. You keep arguing the right of such a book to exist. Well, first it has to be written And once you start writing (and editing!) it, you'll notice the real issues. Such issues will be plot, scenes, characterisation, characters, events, believability, emotional content, grammar, complex sentences, etc real stuff. And those are the things you should focus on, if you want the book to be out there one day, and for people to read it. There is a huge - huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge - difference between what you want to put in a book and what actually gets written. "I want to depict an apocalyptic war" has to turn into actual paragraphs, scenes, descriptions, characters doing things, scenery, internal thoughts, dialogue etc. If you manage to do those well, then people will read your story, regardless of content, hope, no hope, happy or no happy endings etc. At the moment you're just trying to sell an idea and if you read wide you'll notice that your idea has already been done, put into books etc. It's nothing new and there's no point arguing if people will want to read a book like that or not. Books like that exist already and people read them. But those are some well written books. This is not what "escape from reality" mean in regard to reading books. You can think of it as "letting the reader immerse in the book" and that depends on the quality of writing It's not about how different the book is from life. Some books are praised because they sound very real and remind the readers of their own experiences, and that's still "escape" because, well, that's a different topic entirely. There are different ways to get the message across to the reader, you obviously have a preference of one particular way of doing this but that doesn't mean it's the only valid way to do it You're disregarding many great works of literature and their huge impact. You're also disregarding the fact that you can't just tie readers in a chair and make them read your book. That doesn't bode well for your book, on purely technical level. If you want to make people understand this or that, you'll need to find the right method of doing so. "Here's a gross scene about some terrible stuff people do" is not the way to do it. First you'll have to make people read your book and then you'll have to write a book that is able to influence people's minds. That's the really difficult part you're not focusing on. Now we're talking Writing books that emotionally touch people is a fine craft. It's not just about depicting gross stuff. On the other hand, you seem to be focused solely on depicting gross stuff. I'd suggest you focus more on the craft of writing itself. And read a lot. You're not inventing the wheel, you know. Ah, the self-indulgence. It's a slippery slope. That's why you need to familiarize yourself with the books which are already out there. You're not breaking any new ground. No, it isn't Unless you're working for the pharmacological industry Is making peole depressed what you really want? Or do you actually want for people to become proactive on certain issues? Those are two really different things. A depressed person will throw your book in the bin and tell all their friends not to buy it. A proactive person will go out and change the world to be a better place.
I just have to say, you use way too many emojis, bud. But I haven't finished the book but I'm not worried about writing it, I'm worried how the theme will be received so I wouldn't worry if I were you. Okay, so I got confused what your definition of it was. I still think it's pretty immersive because it involves a completely different world that has a different dynamic from our one. Again, the issue isn't writing, it's just the theme I want to figure out, really. It's really not like that at all and that's why you need to stop assuming. It takes a while before I get to the gross stuff in the book. Something wrong with making something cool and appealing to audiences? I didn't... say I was? Not every human being will react the same to one thing.
The blurb is a work in progress but thank you for the advice, your suggestion sounds better. I don't know how to include all of that without spoiling too much.
Okay but in the scenario I describe above, how exactly is any of that applicable? It's a very extreme scenario that has never happened before on an universal scale.
It's like the more I go into detail about my book, the more information we discover about it, isn't it? Yes, because that's what I've written in the book. My personal beliefs have nothing to do with the beliefs my characters have. I wish we all could just watch reruns of Fresh Prince on Bel-Air and that everything would be fine too. The afterlife that I talk about is consistent with the theme of the Plague God that created the diseases and I explain why later on as well. The war to end all wars is not realistic. People committing acts of cannibalism when stuffed on a cramped ship with tons of other starving humans with no way to escape is. Perhaps there's nothing in this thread showing character development because I haven't actually introduced or explained any characters yet? Perhaps I will post a chapter in the novels section after all.
Also, I posted part 1 of my first chapter here. https://www.writingforums.org/threads/end-war-1561-words.159320/ Just for anybody who is curious. Also, I'm not sure if any of my critiques are actually going to help, a lot of threads date back to 2014 - 2016. Are they even checking back for a critique anymore?
What is the big deal with tragedy? So everybody dies at the end. As long as the characters are likeable in some fashion then it could work. However I can see why it would put off some, seeing as they just watch them struggle the whole time just to end up losing in the end. From what I understand, if it isn't a Romance or Erotica you can have the dark ending and it will be just fine. Though it would be a nice change of pace from the endings that always just work out and happy nonsense with nothing really to deal with in the aftermath.
I even plan to write more books based on this universe, so it isn't really the end for everything, just the humans.
It's not about rooting for them, it's about relating and sympathizing with people who have no hope or way out. The movie Downfall shows people who had no choice in fighting the war or not and they had to face the same doom the rest of Nazi Germany did anyway. Nobody wished they would win but they definitely felt bad for those who fought in the war. Same kind of idea here.