The I/me usage isn't the problem...at least not normally within most first person POV stories that I read. A lot of it is the writing itself. For the most part, Unknown, what we see of your writing is raw, totally unedited. What you wrote in both first and third person could both be edited down to it's simplest form and be better. I'm sorry to say, as much of a snob as I admit to being, neither I would consider great. Ok, maybe. On the level of Twilight...there abouts. There is something about well written that jumps out at you. It grabs you, sucks you in, and makes it so that you can't put it down. Then there are reads that you go through, grudgingly, and finish because you have to finish it just to make sure you are right...that the writing is not as good as you hoped. One of the books I couldn't put down this past few weeks was John Dies At The End...yes I've read it online, but the printed hard copy had some better editing than the original had...though still basically the same. Not all writers need massive editing to have a book publishable, but some do need a good amount. If your story is sound, your characters well fleshed out, then the editing process will be simple. So what you made one slip int TP POV, change it for the better back into FP and finish the story...then go back and edit.
All right. I think I'm gonna stick with my gut feeling about 1st person. I know I'm not skilled enough to pull it off, but it is a rough draft. I can always try to perfect my style and get better at it, but in the end after I've finished the draft I can always decide to switch to 3rd person for the rewrite. So thanks so much for the advice, and wish me luck.
There have been some pretty heated and highly informative debates about first- and third-person writing on the site. It might be worth spending an hour reading through some of them so that you start to get an idea of the real differences between the two...its a lot more than a different pronoun...
I just wanted to say that I really liked this comment you made because it's really all about us writing and practicing and trying out different styles and such. So whichever POV you choose to write in, you'll still benefit from the main thing: that you are continuing to write.
I'm weary to do it myself because I generally don't like reading it. You always take that risk when writing from more than one POV because the reader may like character A and his story, but not character B and her story. I remember when I first started reading Swan Song, I always stopped because it cycled between three MCs all in different parts of the world. It felt like a damn soap opera, which I dislike. I'm glad I stuck to it, though. After a while I loved all the character and their stories and how they all come together in the end. Great novel, BTW, by Robert McCammon. Better than The Stand, IMO, and it is similar to The Stand. When Dean Koontz switches POVs I don't mind because when he does it, he only does it briefly, and it is to get into the bad guy's head. He has short chapters written from the antagonist's POV. Of my five novels, I've only written a multiple POV novel once, and in it, I only switch to the antagonist's POV for short chapters. I believe any story can be told from a single POV, but some stories will be stronger by use of multiple points of view.
Two things to consider. 1. Will the story be a better story if told in first person? 2. What are you more skilled at writing?
I think you are understimating the effort to switch viewpoints in a revision. It will almost certainly be a real rewrite. Writing in first person is a very different mindset, and it substantially alters how you tell the story.
You should avoid changing POVs within a scene. There are writers who know how to pull it off (Frank Herbert being one of them, but his son Brian makes a mess of it), but in general it tends to be disorienting to the reader. POV transitions need to be well managed, and that takes skill that only comes through practice. Chapter boundaries are often a better choice hor POV switches than scene changes within a chapter, and you are usually best off maintaining thord person past tense throughout. First and third are sufficiently distinct in tone (when done properly) that transitions between them tend to be bumpy.
I know, that's why these doubts were kind of holding me back at the moment. POV is kind of a big deal to say the least, but when I get to the end of the story, and if I feel like it could be told better from a different viewpoint... I know it'll be different, and that's what would push me to make the decision if I would choose to do so.
Changing povs I think actually make stories more interesting. You have to pay more attention to follow what's happening and that makes me feel more engaged in the story. ~Eliza
when you rewrite, as I feel that you should... Maybe a 3rd person limited could be feasible? Just a thought. That's what I am attempting to do.
I read your examples and I really liked the 1st person best. It felt more honest and this is one thing I value highly in things I read. Fine prose comes second, really -- and if I feel like the fine prose gets in the way of honesty, creating a formal facade, then I won't even bother to read it. I wan't uncensored truth in things I read, not wax and polish.
Its difficult as everyone has there own opinions, and whilst it is true that third person can offer more scope as it can give information the character isn't privvy too this isn't always the case, if you take a look at My sisters kepper by Jodi Picault for instance, it is written entirely in first person, but from a different persons persepective in each chapter. Not that i woudl recommend this especially for first time writing but its an example of how you don't need to be limited,
Changing pov in a scene is a difficult thing to do, but could be changed within chapters and not be too jarring, Jodi picault changes viewpoints (though remains in first person) in each chapeter in my sisters keeper and it works well, whilst other authors switch between first and third, such as Jeff Lindsays Dexter in the Dark, but it is something which requires a lot of practice and skill and can easily become a mess.
I guess I'd disagree a little with the statement (and it may be the context you're discussing it in Mammamaia is pieces by writers trying to get published), as I write about half of my pieces in first person POV. I would say that it can make for a boring or very restricted story, but if first person POV is the correct one for the story and the writer executes it well the 1st person POV story won't end up boring and won't have any hint of restriction. I will agree that it takes more effort to avoid many of the pitfalls of 1st person POV that could lead it to be a boring/restrictive piece, which of course wouldn't be accepted by an editor (and thus published). As to the question: If the story flows better with 3rd person POV and it is easier to tell the story in that manner, choose it over 1st person POV. It is better to decide that early as it will require less time rewriting and revising. Terry
UnknownBearing, Write what you are most comfortable with and what works best for the story you are creating. Dont worry about publishing and seek your voice, hone your craft and develop your characters until they are as real as your neighbors. I've gone back and forth on what to do with my novel and decided that only one character in the book will be in 1st person, the rest of the novel is in the 3rd. I think it works well for what Im doing. All POV's have pros and cons. Good luck to you!
If I were you I would change my mind on which narrative voice you wanted to use. I think what happened was that you subconsciously told yourself you'd rather have it third person. But since your story is dealing with one character only, and you want it that way, keep it first person. Maybe you were just use to writing in Third so you slipped up once. If your mind keeps leading you back to third then keep it third. That's what your most comfortable with for the story. Just don't ever stop writing in a certain narrative voice because it's hard. Keep trying, all right?
My story is written in third person, and it involves some digressions to explain something better or give more insight to the story. Here is a small excerpt from my story: [3rd tense] It is much harder to catch a Demon than Ossa first assumed.[2nd tense] You must first apply a translucent liquid to the base in the shape of a perfect circle. Would this work, or am I changing tenses too fast, or should I not change tenses at all?
You're not changing tenses, although that's not the right term for what you are talking about (its second- and third-person, as opposed to past or present tense). And you're not changing anything at all. The only thing that changes is that the subject is no longer the character that was being narrated. I suppose technically its written in second-person, but it isn't problematic or distracting at all. People talk like that all the time, and overall the piece remains in third person.
Thirdwind had there with “one.” Traditionally, a third-person narrative uses “one” in place of “you.”
Yes, you should only be used when giving instructions to someone. For example: "Can we kill the demon?" "Yes, but you have to coat the bullet in silver first." Compared to: "Can we kill the demon?" I remembered from class that one could kill a demon if they had coated their bullet in silver. I replied: "Depends. Do you have any silver around here?"
Don't confuse the narrative tense with the tenses in individual sentences. Individual sentences WILL containg different tenses, but the narrative tense shouldn't bounce around. You have to consider the context of each sentence to decide whether you are breaking the narrative tense. What's Your Point (of View)? talks a little about this.
