Well, I'm kind of in a predicament now. I guess that's kind of usual for me, but there's nothing I can really do about it I guess. As a lot of you know, I just had an extremely awful break up. So I've been all moody and stupid lately, sorry for those it was directed at. I sincerely apologize. But now since my girlfriend decided she'd go and get a new boyfriend right off the bat (what a b****), I decided that the doors are open to me now. Scary, I haven't tried to meet a new girl in a while, scary. :/ But here's the major problem. I'm transferring schools next semester, which means I'll be leaving in three months and never coming back. As you probably can already tell, this presents a problem. I want to go out and dates and whatnot, because, well, it's a hell of a lot of fun. haha. But I'm scared that I'll hurt somebody. I don't want someone to end up liking me too much and then just leaving soon after. It's so hard to know what to do. I want to be with someone, because that's how I really operate well, but I don't want to cause a catastrophe at the school. Should I just stay away from girls at school, or what? I don't know. I want a relationship with and end date. haha. How terrible is that? *Shakes his head while writing this whole thing*
You want a relationship with an end date....? Are you honestly that shallow? It's called the rebound, sweetie. All the biggest losers go on them. Don't be a loser; i'm sure you can go one better than that. You can safely bet she's doing a rebound jobby (by the sounds of it she is, anyway), and you know what the best thing you can do is? Be single! Why not go out on 'dates' with friends? Have some fun. You don't need one exclusive female companion just to fill the gap. Don't spend the time you have left having false relationships, it isn't worth it. Go out with friends and make happy memories. Not that you should care what your ex thinks, but the one thing that'll get to her the most is seeing you enjoying your life as a single guy.
Listen to her, she makes sense. Getting into a relationship is not a compulsion just because your significant other is in a relationship with someone else. Trust me, my first guy and me learnt it the hard way. He got into this relationship, because I spurned his efforts(long story), and angered by that, I spoiled a friendship, by getting into a relationship with this guy, I'd earlier refused too, becaus eI knew it was doomed for disaster. Suffice to say, neither relations worked out long and we're both single(..and happy)...now.
Not fair. Rebounds are actually quite good, psychologically speaking. But a typical rebound lasts from one night to a week. Anything longer than this and you're asking for trouble. Don't hate on the rebounds. They'll save your life!
Strangely, my only proper relationship was sort of a rebound. Lasted 3 months, and did me a lot of good getting over a girl. It ended before it should have done, because we were actually very good together. We all do daft things. I'm susceptible to the rebound because I'm an emotional ****tard, but in terms of virtually everything else my head is pretty much screwed on 100%.
I just did a very stupid thing. I sent my ex a message telling him I forgive him and hoped me could find it in his heart to forgive me for everything I did to him. He responded with so mch hate and anger, said everything that went wrong was my fault and that I desvered everything I got. I tried to leave him to many times. He knew I hated him, but he wouldn't let me leave, and he acts like its my fault for how long he "put up with me." And I have recently met a wonderful, kind, gentle, man who I feel safe with, but now all I can think about is how I might hurt him.
He isn't wort the pain. Forgiving is not a gift to the transgressor. You can forgive without ever saying so. Forgiving is simply letting go of the emotional burden. It is a gift you give to yourself.
It doesn't change the fact that he's not completely wrong about things I did to him. We were both horrible to each other. It doesn't change the fact that I could still do horrible things to Andrew. I tried to be a good Jew, fullful a Mitzvah, and look where it's got me.
But the fact that you were horrible to him doesn't doom you to being horrible to everyone you date from now on. Everyone makes mistakes and does things that they later wish they hadn't. Now that you've gone through that experience and learned, you just have to make sure that you don't repeat those mistakes with your new guy.
My relationship with my ex was a pretty big train wreck, so I can sympathize with wondering if it's worth it. Personally, knowing what I would be missing if I hadn't taken a risk on Joel, I would say it's absolutely worth it. But just because it was right for me doesn't necessarily mean it was right for you, so I guess that's for you to decide. *hugs*
Rei, if you don't respect yourself, people around you will tend not to respect you either. You deserve better treatment from yourself.
I was gonna say cubed. And totally agreed with what they said. You must first love yourself before anyone else will love you. You deserve to be loved and don't let anyone, yourself included, tell you otherwise.
I agree with what you all have said, but I just want to mention that sometimes it's a good thing to recognize parts of your personality/character that may need to change in order to have a happy, healthier relationship with someone else. I don't know if that's what Rei is getting at, but if she is, sometimes it's a good thing to go through difficult self-analysis. *anyway, that's my 2cents at 1:22 a.m. when my own life is on major fail, lol*
UPDATE: Shannons love life is non-existant. Shannon is sad and lonely and sick of it and wants a man. That is all.
I want the opposite! Bwahahaha Sorry, probably not the place for a joke, but it is true. I am a sad panda without a girly friend, but I suppose I'll be better in time. Hope the best will come your way in time Shannon. =]
"I wanted to shoot every Panda that wouldn't screw to save its species. . ." Ah good ol Fight Club. It won't, The Best and I don't get along very well.
Well then they weren't the best for you. I don't want perfect, I want the right person for me. Failure is embedded in perfection.
