What was said: Of course, I understand. What was meant: Fuck no, I don't want to be just friends. What was said: She's a sweet girl.
What was said: She's a sweet girl. What was meant: Wow, what a little tyrant of a brat. I can't believe you let her get away with all that. What was said: I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off. (In traffic)
What was said: I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off. (In traffic) Meant: hahaaaa, i win!! What was said: the thing you gotta ask ya self is, do i feel lucky, well? do ya? Punk!
What was said: The thing you gotta ask your self is, do I feel lucky? Well, do ya - punk? What was meant: Say 'what' again motherf****, I dare you, I double dare you, say 'what' again! What was said: I don't think I should stand up right now, Mrs. Swartz.
What was said: I don't think I should stand up right now, Mrs. Swartz. What was meant: I'm sick. I'm going to puke on you if you make me stand up. What was said: So... did you get stuck in traffic, again?
What was said: I think it's finished, you can go home now. What was meant:As soon as you leave I can fix it. What was said: He means well.
What was said: He means well. What was meant: It took a lot of effort to make him do even this much for you, but I'll tell you that at a better time. What was said: To the movies? Sure! Let's invite Rachel as well!
What was said: To the movies? Sure! Let's invite Rachel as well! What was meant: To the movies? Sure! Invite Rachel cause I'm going to try and get this three way going tonight. What was said: I really like you.
What was said: I really like you. What was meant: Seriously how have you not noticed that I've been in love with you since the moment I met you What was said: Oh, okay. Come on in then.
Said: Oh, okay. Come on in then. Meant: Get out! Can't you understand a hint? Said: Everybody wants me dead.
What was said: Everybody wants me dead. What was meant: I've killed more people than the ones who want me dead. Now, why are you talking to me? What was said: Sorry, I'm a vegetarian.
What was said: Sorry, I'm a vegetarian. What was meant: Dear Lord, do you expect me to eat that? What was said: That was very imaginative.
What was said: That was very imaginative. What was meant: I have never heard anything more dull in my life. What was said: Men whose pride claims more than mortals may.
What was said: Men whose pride claims more than mortals may. What was meant: You are so full of it. What was said: "You have the cutest baby I've ever seen!"
What was said: "You have the cutest baby I've ever seen!" What was meant: Okay. I've said what you wanted to hear, now get that thing away from me! What was said: Dude, there's a unicorn behind you...
What was said: Dude, there's a unicorn behind you... What was meant: I think you have the brain of a six years old. What was said: Hey, I insist you can keep it.
What was said: Hey, I insist you can keep it. What was meant: Please be a moron and take this piece of junk off my hands. What was said: "I did not have sex with that woman!"
What was said: "I did not have sex with that woman!" What was meant: "I did not have sex with that woman!" What was said: "You like long hair, right?"
What was said: "You like long hair, right?" What was meant: "I will go get my hair cut right now if there is any indication of you not liking my hair." What was said: "He means well, really.."
What was said: "He means well, really..." What was meant: "I'm just trying to excuse his ignorance so you don't get TOO angry at him, even though it's rightfully so..." What is said: "I'm sorry, I can't tell you much of anything... I'm just a beginner."
What was said: "I'm sorry, I can't tell you much of anything... I'm just a beginner." What was meant: "Clearly you're completely ineducable: why would I want to waste my time talking to you at all?" What was said: "Actuality is only a systematic impoverishment of potential, isn't it?"
What was meant: Hey, Philosophy 101 Professor! Does memorizing your book get me an "A"? What was said: Oh, I faint at the very sight of blood!
What was said: Oh, I faint at the very sight of blood! What was meant: I am useless in a crisis situation. What was said: I'm not a sexist, but women can't drive. Am I right guys?
What was said: I'm not sexist, but women can't drive. Am I right guys? What was meant: Seeing as you're all women, I'm basically insulting you all..... What was said: That's a lovely picture! Where did you get it?
What was said: That's a lovely picture! Where did you get it? What was meant: That picture looks like it was taken by a retarded monkey. What was said: I'm so sorry. It's never happened before...
