So it's a murder of crows A herd of cows A school of fish What should I call a group of military officers when someone is just having random thoughts in their head poking fun at a high-ranking group who wander from meeting to meeting getting nothing done? A foxhole of officers? A parade of officers?
Here's the paragraph so far if anyone cares. As everyone moved into the room and shuffled around to their respective seats, Che had a brief image of the group as a herd of officers. Endlessly moving from one watering hole meeting to the next, but never getting anywhere. He wondered what a group of officers should be named. Would it be a parade of officers? Or maybe a foxhole of them. Nah. A Salute of officers seemed more appropriate. He tried not to break a smile as he went over to his seat.
These would work if the character was trying to be serious. He's entertaining himself with random silliness.
The joke is good because it reveals your MC's character, but perhaps you could tighten up the writing, without losing the sense. Something like this (but your way not mine):
Make them all COL's and call them a flock (seriously, a COL is often refered to as a 'full bird' colonel)
a disaster of officers? an impasse of officers? My favorite aggregation, by the way, is a dazzle of zebras.
I would just use a herd of sheep. The imagery works better. "Che had a brief image of the group as a herd of sheep." Everyone will get the gist that they're officers.
I like a flock of officers better than a herd of officers. But maybe that's because I think flock is a funnier word. It does make them seem all like birds right off the bat where a herd could be any sort of land-bound herbivore. If I thought sheep immediately it would have more meaning, but only things being herded ties directly to sheep like that. A herd is sort of the most general term for a group of animals.
This is the best one by far, because it is both funny and close enough to true. 'The officers mess' is a place that is off limits to enlisted men where the officers go to relax and have meals. Also to get drunk. I've heard the term 'the mess' used to literally mean 'the officers who are stationed here' and it plays off the continuing idea that the officers are surrounded by luxury and old boy civility even on campaign which is something universally believed by private soldiers; that the officers have it easy. So 'a mess of officers' implies nicely that they are fops, that they never get off their arse and do hard work and they are a complete and utter bloody shambles who needs to be babysat by enlisted men.
Agreed. A mess of officers does seem like an obvious thought the Captain would have. In this scene, he's about to be offered a change of job and promotion to Admiral. But I want him to, at least, see himself as not part of the privileged upper echelon of entitled leaders. As everyone moved into the room and shuffled around to their seats, Che had a brief image of the group as a herd of sheep. Endlessly plodding from one watering hole meeting to the next, never getting anywhere. What would you call them, a mess of officers, a parade? Officially it would be a cadre, but a salute of officers seemed more appropriate. He tried not to break into a smile as he went over to his seat.
