In my story, my MC knows one character as Eli, and she only meets him in an alternate reality. She also knows of someone as Nathan, though she has never met him, and he resides in normal reality. Toward the end, she realizes that the two are one same person. From that point on, she is meeting him, in turns, in both aspects of reality. MC has a hard time reconciling with the fact that “they” are a single person, partly because they're so different from one another. I have explained, through her voice, that in alternate reality, he will always be Eli to her. And when she thinks about his predicament in normal life, the name Nathan sticks in her mind. My alpha reader thinks this may be confusing to the reader, and that MC should call him Eli/Nathan or Eli-Nathan. This looks odd to me and I’m not sure how to go on about this. I know this may be hard to judge without seeing the whole story, but I would appreciate any suggestions.
I'm usually bad at names, but I don't think even I would be so hopeless I couldn't remember that Eli and Nathan are the same person since it seems to be a pretty big revelation, so no matter which one is mentioned, I'd know it's this specific character. Based on the information I have now about your story, to me this is just fine:
I think your way sounds fine, and natural. But I would put more weight on the opinion of someone who's actually read it (preferably multiple people). Is she saying that she understood but thinks others might be confused, or was she confused? Either way I think I'd get at least one fresh reader and see if they have the same issue.
I think the Eli/Nathan or Eli-Nathan thing would appear clunky to me. I kind of get it though as, without care, the alternatives could edge on being cheesy. If there was something different about their appearances maybe, something that they wear, or a physical attribute that invites a nickname for each. Would this make it easier to address? Or how about referencing where they reside...write in an affectation your protagonist applies to them and uses (abbreviated) for herself... Eli-T (this world) Eli-O (other world).
If the two identities/personas of the one person are as different as you say, I think the way you are doing it already makes sense. If Eli would do something Nathan would never dream of doing, and vice versa, then trying to express the very different behaviors and speech of one person with one name will get confusing. If I know that Eli belongs in one reality and Nathan in another, the name immediately becomes the flag to alert me to which persona and which reality I need to be in, in my head. I don't think you'd be gaining anything by calling him Eli-Nathan. Combining the names and referring to him by that hybrid name ever time renders the two-name thing moot and you may as well just choose and stick with one single name for both identities. If you are really worried about it, you could use two variants of the one name. In Reality A, he is Eli and in Reality B, he's Elijah. Or Nathan/Nathaniel.
Not to get all quantum on this, it is going to happen anyway. He would have the same Name in ever multiverse as he does in the one that your character knows him in. To have them so completely different then the one in this verse is going to be highly opposite in a verse way down the line. If it is just the next verse over, they would be pretty similar so you have to move through more versions/verses to find the Eli/Nathan contrasts. Having settles that bit of a mess. Why would the same person that exists in multiple realities have two different names? If I met you in the next 50 universes, it would still be you except they would steadily become more and more different. But they would all have the same name. Perhaps one is the meta doppelganger of the other, and that is why they don't share a name to begin with. It is plausible as doppelgangers exist here on earth, so why not in alt-universes. But just because they look like each other, does not mean they would have anything in common what so ever beyond looking like identical twins with nothing else to tie them together. But if they are the same person as you say, then they would not have different names.
What she said is that combining the two names makes it clearer to the reader that they have now become one person in MC's awareness. I'll have to double check that I have written it clearly enough. I trust her opinion, but as she reminds me from time to time, she is but one reader. She has been working with me on this since last October, a long time for a 47K story... Her perspective on it might be different when she get the finished manuscript to read again. I'll have a few beta-readers too.
Early on in the story, the MC states that she doesn't like her name to be shortened to a nickname, so she wouldn't use nicknames for others (she's like me that way). Right after the revelation, which I hope I have hinted at in the right measure as the story unfolds, she is confused for a while, but then she comes to grips with the fact. I'll watch out for potential cheesiness, though.
My purpose for the two names was to create ambiguity in the reader's mind. Are they the same person, or are they not? I'm not sure how well I have done it. I didn't want a big reveal that would make the readers feel cheated, nor do I want to make them feel like I think they're not smart enough to guess the whole thing early on... That's one question I'll have for my betas. I like the idea that the two names are one more tool I can use to signal the change in reality. BTW, Elijah is Nathan's middle name, a clue that comes at the beginning of the story, but that my MC doesn't pay much attention to. Cave Troll, I think I have misused the terms "alternate reality". In my story, I refer to non-ordinary reality, but I'm not sure yet that I'll be keeping that. This other aspect of reality is accessible through a change in consciousness. There aren't two versions of the same person in different worlds. Maybe it would be more akin astral projection. Nathan has no reasons to think that MC could link his two "identities", but someone else is looking for him and he doesn't want to be found, so he's not taking any chance and changes his name. ------------------------------- I wasn't sure I'd have time to reply to all, that's why the many posts. Thanks everybody for your feedback
I think there's a difference between being intentionally cryptic, which can be annoying and confusing to readers, and then just having two names for one character, which doesn't feel all that challenging or difficult to remember. Maybe your alpha-reader could clarify why exactly this could be a deal-breaker, if that's what s/he's afraid. It's also possible s/he just wants to points out any potential problems in your MS, big or small.
I'm hoping to send her the final two chapters by the middle of next week. I will suggest that we discuss this again after she has read the whole edited manuscript and can better judge if there's a clarity issue or not.
