Hey there, not sure if word mechanics or dialogue development but perhaps more suitable for this forum. Having a little issue with dialogue tags before the character speaks, and having it not sound like some 10 year old wrote it. Not sure if it's just me or perhaps I'm just overly critical but looking for tips to have the pre-dialogue tags (Not always a tag sometimes a character action to indicate who'll be speaking), appear more "natural". Just like there are obvious tips for tags after speech (Using "said" often is fine, avoid repetitive styles and tags, etc.) is there anything pre-speech? Sometimes I have a large group of people and I get the feeling just opening up with dialogue without indicating who's speaking first can be momentarily confusing when you don't know who it is until the end. Some of my examples from my novel at the moment are: Lisa pulled down her shawl covering her mouth. "blah blah blah" Looking up, Ian made a nod before he spoke. "bleh, bleh" Ian merely nodded once more before continuing. "blah blah blah" Lisa stared hard into the eyes of Joe. "bleh, bleh" Any tips on pre dialogue tags or sites to look up? Thanks in advance.
The thing I immediately notice about each of those is there are too many words. You want to cut everything down to the bare minimum, in every part of writing. Anything that isn't contributing in some meaningful way needs to go—cut out all excess fluff words and phrases. Lisa pulled down her shawl. Ian nodded. Ian nodded. Lisa stared Joe in the eyes. Here are a few pages about dialogue tags and action beats. I've scanned each one rapidly and they seem to be pretty good: Getting Dialogue Right: How to Use Dialogue Tags and Action Beats Dialogue tags and action beats Dialogue Tags: Definition, Tips, and Examples One thing I didn't see mentioned on those pages is you use a comma for a dialogue tag and a period for an action beat, because the action beat is a separate sentence. A tag is part of the same sentence as the dialogue itself. I believe this holds true as much for tags and beats in front of dialogue as after.
Thanks for the links, and I'll consider revisions to shortening the action beats, dependent on the necessity of course. I think after looking at it, I'm trying to convey who's speaking before I write the dialogue. At the moment I'm only writing action beats for pre-dialogue, and while I did see examples of: He said, "blah, blah", in the links you posted, it still looks look something a 1o year old writing his first story would write... Don't know why. Having the tag come after the dialogue rather than before seems the much better way of writing it. Just me?
There's a third option. Don't be afraid to break up dialog with a tag between sentences or clauses. You don't have to wait all the way until the end of the dialog to find out who's speaking, but you can still break up the monotony of constant action beats. Example: "Hang on," said Ian. "That's not what I meant." I also wouldn't worry about introducing the dialogue when it's shorter. Example: "I don't know," said Ian. The reader doesn't have to wait to find out who's speaking, and again, it breaks up monotony.
I've never really thought about it, but I don't think I've ever put a tag in front of dialogue. It can be done, but does seem a bit odd.
And of course in many cases once it's established who's on which side of the conversation, you don't need to tag anything for a while, or at least certain reponses. "Oh come on, nobody dresses like that anymore!" Kim rolled her eyes. "Bell-bottoms are coming back! They sell them vintage in all the shops." No need for a tag or action beat in a case like this. Especially if there are only two people in the scene, or if the conversation is between only two of them.
Thanks, and yup I'm okay with the other examples such as tags inbetween speech and tagless speech when we essentially know who's talking, but that pre-speech tag/action beat just seems to knock me for six, especially when it comes to a group of people of which any of them could be the one to open their mouths. I've been actively reading a few more novels with focus on how other authors do it and notice that it's usually just the tag during mid or post dialogue, which if I really think about it, you don't really notice. You will sometimes not know who's speaking until the tag but by then your brain I think kinda retroactively just believes you knew all along.
