i'll just be honest: i don't know almost ANYTHING about world building, particularly in terms of structuring the way my setting looks (geography, physical descriptions of rooms/halls/houses/whathaveyou). so how much can i leave up to the people i talk to who know more about this sort of thing than i do, before it becomes a little pathetic, with people starting to say "dude are you gonna make me write the book for you?"
If this is fantasy, you can structure it any way you want. Don't feel hamstrung by what you worry other people might think. You might be making more of this than you need to. I'd say get your basic structure in place, then add to it as needed for your story. Don't let the setting BE your story. It should only be a framework. What is it you want your story to be about? (Characters, plot, dilemmas, etc?) What do you want to happen in your story? Construct a framework so it can, and you'll be fine. Just ensure that your setting details don't contradict one another—but that just means you need to pay attention to what you're doing as you write, and keep track of what you've done. If it's not fantasy, you'll need to do research ...even if it's Sci-Fi, to some extent. Again, though, figure out what your story will need. You don't need to build (or research) an entire world. Just ensure that what happens within your world makes sense. Think of all the great writers from the past (in all genres) and think about whether they needed lots of input from other people before they wrote their stories. I think you'll realise you can do this yourself, just like most of them did. Don't suck the fun out of writing by constantly worrying about the result, or too unsure about when to start. Just get in there and get it going. Envision a scene, and write it. What does the scene need in terms of background and setting? Get that set up, then write another scene, etc. Build as you go, and you'll get there—yes, even if you'll need to make a few continuity changes later on. I guess my basic advice would be to worldbuild as much as you want to, but don't let it keep you from writing your story. If you get paralyzed worrying about perfection, you'll never get there.
There's nothing wrong with a bit of research! If you're aiming for a realistic sort of environment, and you're unsure if it makes sense that, say, a desert could form next to a rainforest, then ask around, and search online. When it comes to culture, it's fine to ask for references and such, but you should probably chiesel out the details yourself. If you want a room to be based on a typical greek bath house, then you'd need references or pictures. In my opinion, the artistry lies in how you'd describe it. Could you give an example of an instance where you felt you asked too much, or "gave your workload away"? It's hard to talk about this in a general sense, since I'm more of a case-to-case person.
It may be that you're asking people before doing enough research on your own, or that you're not asking them the right questions. I do a ton of research beforehand so my questions can be laser-focused and not take up a lot of someone's time. As often as not, I have the scene almost finished before asking an interviewee for details to flesh it out, or I'll ask them to read a finished scene to see if I knew what the heck I was talking about.
I think the question you have to ask is, how far do you let other people build your world for you before it becomes their world and not yours?
First, remember, it's your world. Also, research never hurts. You can research architecture, building designs from different periods of history, so on and so forth. Keep in mind, you can even use these to do some rough sketches or drawings of your own ideas, just so you know, physically, what your character might be looking at or observing. And if you find someone who's passionate about the type of things you're researching, you'll be surprised how much people are willing to help you. An architecture professor at a local university might love to spend twenty minutes on the phone with you answering questions, or you may even be able to sit in on a class, or pay to take a class, worse comes to worse. But remember, research online and at the library is free! Well, except for the wifi bill
Are you saying you're not sure how to describe your world? If it's a matter of not knowing enough words then the answer is a matter of learning, in which case, it doesn't matter how much time you spend asking people questions, whether they're professional or not. You can't just make up words and expect the story to be enjoyable, so getting a feel for how other people describe or look at things, from their unique perspectives, will be fantastic for helping you sort through your own ideas. Speaking of which, your own ideas are just as important. Everything I write in a story is a habit I built based off of somebody else telling me "that's how it's done," and sometimes that person was me, but more often than not it was someone else, because if you want to write book that people enjoy then it has to be relatable to how people experience the world. You can rely on yourself for much of that, but eventually you're going to need to know differing perspectives. Does the land sweep or does it swing? Is the tree leaning or is it crooked? Do the flowers dangle over the grass heads like stars or butterflies? Is the hallway stifling or dusty? Is the home hunched or low? You'll only get a good, well-rounded feel for these things by getting different, living perspectives. It doesn't hurt to ask someone how they feel standing in a room, or to rifle through your books seeking how another author describes a particular thing. Or to even ask yourself how you might describe something that catches your eye, scenery or object. Maybe the more appropriate question would be, what does [insert present object here] remind you of? The bright sundown light on clouds reminds me of gold gilding, so I might say "the sun gilt the rims of the clouds in a fine gold." It might remind you of fire, though, so you might say "the sky was on fire." The more questions, the better, I say. Eventually everything has to be filtered through your own sense of creativity anyway.
i'm doing something in (my understanding of) the tradition of magical realism. so something like a desert forming next to a rainforest could be part of it, as far as i understand, AS LONG AS i'm utilizing that concept in a way that makes the point i want to make, whether that point be contained to being fit for the story, OR i'm trying to make a wider, more humanity-driven point FOR the readers to take in and maybe (hopefully) look at the world from a different angle. i'm not sure what i would want a room (any old room) to look like. i'm not sure how deeply i should be thinking about that. i'm not sure if i want every single setting and character to make a statement about humanity as WE experience and shape it or not. i kinda think i do, simply because i am influenced by "literary" authors far more than "genre" authors. that's just one reason, there are many. but it is the simplest reason. another reason is that i like stories with a message. NOT, mind, preaching. i do NOT want to preach (which is another concern i have pertaining to a separate element that i'm considering--i don't want to get weepy OR preachy about MY OWN life, but i do want to mirror some of the things i've experienced, and the emotions i've felt from them, in the story(ies).
