In the story I'm writing, one of the MCs makes it to heaven after being in hell for so long. But she is also the Familiar of a mage who is currently trapped in hell with a legion of angels coming to shank him. She tries desperately to convince god to let her go back and protect her master, but god does not let her. She becomes so desperate that she tries several ways to kill herself and be sent to hell for being a sort of suicide so that she can get to her master and protect him. THis doesn't work, cuz' she's already dead, but it does convince one of the archangels to let her leave heaven. Is that too dark?
The motivation isn't realistic. Wanting to go back to Earth after it took you so long to get out of hell?? Why doesn't she do what people on Earth do...pray to God and ask that her Master be okay. At least she has a direct line to God now. My God wouldn't be so cruel as to let me want to commit suicide to get out of heaven. Heaven must not be much of a reward if all you want to do is go back...for whatever reason. ETA: Oh, I see, she wants to go back to hell. Same thing applies. I would leave it up to God who he wants to see make it out of hell. Who is she to intefere with what God has planned for this other person.
Well, there's more to it than I'm saying here, I'm just wondering if this particular concept of attempted suicide to get OUT of heaven would get me into trouble. But considering the immediate reaction that God wouldn't allow this, which was the exact point of her actions, I guess more detail is needed. She wasn't condemned to hell for torment, she was in hell because supernaturals previously weren't allowed into heaven. While she was down there, she became the familiar of a spirit mage, and she was mislead into believing that they both would be allowed to pass through the pearly gates. God has never had any meaning for her other than that he was the leader of the opposite plane of existence that she came to call home, which is why she doesn't think to pray that her master is okay. Especially when it's angels going down to shank her master. Her devotion to her master outweighs her final reward to her, in this case. THe mage jumps down her throat for her decision as well, though.
Well, it's fantasy so probably anything can go. It just isn't most people's perception of God that you can get up there and start begging to go back, to the point of commiting suicide.
In trouble with who? I am sure you will offend many people, but they are not likely to be reading your work so do you really care? Now if you are at all religious or spiritual then you may get into trouble with leaders and members of those groups that you may care about.
Well.... I recall being in heaven at least twice before. One time I recall 'they' were chasing me and forced me into the top of a cyclone shaped object and then I popped out here on earth. Another time my wife and I discussed coming here , again [do not remember the previous times], and then we got sent here to eventually meet up and get married. I think you can find other ways than suicide in heaven to achieve your goal.
It isn't how Christians believe heaven and hell work. That hardly applies here though. As you said, it's fantasy. Will you get in trouble? I can't imagine. Ongoing war between heaven and hell, people escaping either, these are established themes in fantasy. If you'd beaten Marvel Comics to the punch fifty years ago, maybe, and that wasn't even remotely the earliest example either. As to suicide as a theme? Yeah, suicide is potentially dark, but you're talking about a dead person here. Real world implications don't apply. Don't worry about this. You're golden.
You won't get in trouble, but you probably would offend a lot of people. You might not care if you do or not, so what ever, but there are probably better, and seemingly more story appropriate ways to go about this. Suicide may not be the way to go with this, because as you said she is already dead, and heaven would probably one of the places with the least amount of things to commit suicide with. Maybe have her allign with some of the sketchier people in heaven or something like that
I would remove the term suicide as a way to accomplish something good. I personally think it sends the wrong message to underdeveloped brains. Maybe you could use a trip to the underworld or something along those lines. I'm not a fan of PC talk so I don't know why I would comment on this except I've been in the no hope situation before and all I would have needed was a little incentive to get me over the edge. For my time it was Jim Morrison meeting us on the other-side.
I'm confused by the "master trapped in Hell with angels coming to shank him" angle. Is the Master dead? If he's not, how's he in Hell? As far as the suicide, it all depends on your target market. It won't garner much praise from the devout, and I wouldn't want to see it in a YA setting, but as long as you're writing for adults you should be fine. My WIP has a similar situation, my MC has already died once (by accident), but he's going to commit suicide (which he hopes will be temporary) to get to Hell to rescue a young girl who's been kidnapped by evil* demons. Kind of a Theseus thing, but this is an urban fantasy that will definitely be targeting adult readers. Spoiler: * my story *Most demons are functionaries who appear evil only because you don't understand their purpose. As a matter of fact, they were Cast Out of Heaven as a result of a collective bargaining action they undertook because they were uncomfortable at having to participate in the Old Testament massacres. Edited to spoiler wrap my WIP details
Strap in, folks. This is about to get crazy. *deep inhale* In the story, Branne, one of the MCs, is a misincarnated Salamander spirit, which basically means that her soul is that of a fire elemental rather than a human, which grants her several fire based abilities. These abilities build throughout the story as she and Jesse, the kid she ends up being summoned as a familiar for, which turns her into a little lava lizard when in the mortal plane. Branne is long dead. SHe died in second grade in a car accident. The reason she got sent to hell instead of heaved despite her innocence is because misincarnations do not have human souls, and the Heaven/Hell/final reward system only applied to human souls. So she's not condemned to hell, but she cannot go to heaven because she is considered a demonic by the system, and loose souls generally aren't allowed to remain on the mortal plane. Because she is not condemned for all eternity, she still ages even though she's dead, albeit much slower than you or I. Enter Jesse. Jesse is a novice summoner/spirit binder/whatever-you-call-a-mage-who-does-stuff-with-souls. He's barred from heaven for witchcraft reasons, but he's not dead. He's in hell because mages attend one of the six Unholy Academies in Hell. WHich is where he meets Branne. Jesse sucks at life, and gets his *ss kicked on the reg. Then one day Branne's taking a stroll and nearly gets hit in the face by a Jesse flying through the air after being Hulk-thrown by another demonic. Branne, because she's basically Natsu and Goku doing a Fusion Dance, kicks some demon *ss. Jesse begins following her, trying to befriend the only demonic who has not tried to kill him that week. Branne wants no part of it, but Jesse doesn't relent until one of Branne's friends lets slip that Branne is not a human soul or a true demonic, which just so happens to meet the criteria of a familiar that Jesse needs if he's ever going to do anything in the world of magic. Branne tells him to go suck an egg. But he keeps following her. As a demonic, Branne gets contracted to go to the mortal realm and do stuff sometimes. On one of these trips, she bumps into Jesse. Because she's dead, no one should be able to see or be physical to her. This wears down her resistance to the idea od working with Jesse, and she agrees to a trial run. She gets super peeved when the familiar thing gives her the form of a little lizard. But eventually takes a shine to Jesse because reasons I'm not going to go into here. (Because the mortal plane is like the one plane she's visited where nothing's trying to kill her, and even Jesse's mom likes her.) So she becomes a familiar full time. In the mortal plane, she is the fire lizard, in the demonic plane she can switch between her human and lizard forms, and when she eventually gets to heaven because she busts her *ss to get the angels' attention and earns an audience with God, she is stuck in human form. Now here's why Angels are after Jesse; He made a deal with the devil, he's rising in strength, and because of who his familiar is and her own mounting dominion over all things fire, heat, and destruction, they're worried he's going to become a threat. Branne has by now formed an extremely close bond of loyalty and trust with Jesse, and he with her. Unfortunately, she's up with big G, while Jesse's down in the land of torment trying not to die when there's a group of basically G.I. Angels after him. God will not let her return to her master because fate of the cosmos stuff that goes way over her head. She flips out, tries to bust out, only to find it's really hard to damage objects in heaven even for her. Then she remembers "suicides go to hell" and tries that route. She manages to mess herself up, but it doesn't work cuz she's already dead. Then she has the bright idea to fling herself into the waters of heaven, because she, as a demonic and the elemental counterpart, would be seriously effed up and most likely killed by being submerged in that holy water jazz. Heaven magic and whatever trying to keep her from killing herself, water turns into holy fire, Branne, being the embodiment of fire, absorbs it, and it lines up nice and neat next to her other modes of flame power, like the True Form Flame and Hellfire. By now, God's figured out that if he doesn't let her go she is going to destroy everything. So he makes a deal with her, binds her power so that she can only access her full potential strength in defense of her master, Jesse, and then drops her out of the sky like a meteor. Back in hell, she kicks angel *ss (Branne saves Jesse from these situations in hell a lot. It's like a running gag until Lucifer gives Jesse a doohickey that makes weapons.) And that's pretty much the plot point. If the suicide aspect of it does anythign to YA readers, "Suicide ain't the way out" will hopefully come across.
It won't get you in trouble with anyone. There's much darker and far more twisted media out there in the world. I would also consider, given the whole ' I want to go to hell' plot line, that somewhere it says 'only the guilty go to hell'. Now there's two interpretations for this, 1) you go to hell because you feel guilty for something you did, 2) you go to hell because God deems you guilty even if you don't feel guilty. So you either think you need punishment and thus put yourself in hell or there is a being, in this case God, which judges everything you do to determine whether or not you deserve punishment.
It's not too dark, but some non-Christian readers will take offense. Don't let that stop you though. Write rebelliously, and don't pander to everyone who might resent your views. If you do, you might as well not write at all.
