1. TheApplicant

    TheApplicant New Member

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    Comma Placement

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by TheApplicant, Mar 30, 2017.

    This is my sentence as is: "Exemplified the characteristics of kindness and leadership and in so doing lent considerable presence to …"


    If you could provide a hard and fast rule here … and if one doesn't exist and it's a matter of preference … I'd appreciate your opinion and—just as important—the rationale behind it. I have thus far opted for 0 commas. Is this breaking, or merely bending, a rule? Thank you.
     
  2. Jupie

    Jupie Senior Member

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    I'm definitely no expert on punctuation and grammar, but I honestly think there's great flexibility with commas. Sometimes it helps to read out loud to see if the pacing is okay. Truthfully, though, I think it comes down to instinct and preference. Like with what I've just done there in my previous sentence...it works with or without the comma, but I wanted to add more meaning to what I was saying. (And now I sound like a pompous arse!).

    Your sentence is fine although it doesn't sound like the beginning of the sentence. There's nothing wrong with using a few ands in one sentence, though too many can feel exhausting. It depends on your style of voice. Some people must always use commas, all of the time, to get across something, but then the sentence overruns and we're loaded with commas, like so, when shorter sentences would be better and have more impact. I have just read a story tonight where the writer uses lots of commas to her advantage, because it reflects her character and natural voice. It really works and compliments her writing, but could just as well go wrong in somebody else's hands. I think it just depends.

    But I'm sure someone else will know the technicalities much better than I do.
     
  3. Midge23

    Midge23 Active Member

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    Can you give us the whole sentence?

    Edited to add: is that actually the complete sentence, as it will appear on the page? In which case, can we have some context?
     
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2017
  4. thirdwind

    thirdwind Member Contest Administrator Reviewer Contributor

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    Also, is this creative writing or something more formal like an academic essay? You can take more liberties if it's creative writing.
     
  5. BayView

    BayView Huh. Interesting. Contributor

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    That sentence has no subject. We need the full sentence for this to work.
     
  6. OurJud

    OurJud Contributor Contributor

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    Your sentence reads fine to me.

    Just don't use commas like this:

     
  7. JLT

    JLT Contributor Contributor

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    Since the sentence is incomplete as it stands, I can only guess at how it will end, but I think I'd punctuate it as "Exemplified the characteristics of kindness and leadership and, in so doing, lent considerable presence to …"
     
  8. ChickenFreak

    ChickenFreak Contributor Contributor

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    You need a subject. I add a subject:

    John exemplified the characteristics of kindness and leadership and in so doing lent considerable presence to …

    I woud add a comma, yes.

    John exemplified the characteristics of kindness and leadership, and in so doing lent considerable presence to …

    I have no hard and fast rule to offer.
     
  9. texshelters

    texshelters Active Member

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    In the book "Writing Tools" by Roy Peter Clark, he starts by telling writers to begin every sentence with a noun. I suggest you rewrite that sentence with that in mind; find the subject and put it first.

    Peace, Tex
     
  10. BayView

    BayView Huh. Interesting. Contributor

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    texshelters likes this.
  11. Thundair

    Thundair Contributor Contributor

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    I use to write like I spoke. With no breaks, but since the editors have slapped my wrist for the running sentences I've changed.
    This book helped, (The Elements of Style, Annotated and Updated for Present-Day Use Strunk Jr., William, Stanford Pritchard)
    As mentioned before, read it and if you pause to high-lite your point, then put a comma there.
    I have written books where the pace or excitement of the subject, decided sentence length, and comma placement.
     
  12. BayView

    BayView Huh. Interesting. Contributor

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    Based on this post I don't think you have a good grasp of where commas go yet.

    There really are rules for these things, and the "comma where you pause" rule isn't a great one. It's better than nothing, probably, but the simple, straightforward rules at the OWL are totally master-able.
     
  13. Thundair

    Thundair Contributor Contributor

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    Thanks I book marked it
     

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