I have a question on the proper way to format non-verbal expressions. We usually use " " for speech and italics for thoughts, but how do we format non-verbal expressions that are not thougths like this: John looked at Paul with eyes that said, What is going on? Paul looked back, I have no idea. Are italics the proper way to format these types of expressions?
Just my two cents, but I think you should try using body language to get the ideas across instead. Show vs Tell. John could glance at Paul with a raised eyebrow and curious expression. Paul could shrug, in return.
Yup, understood. The passage is going to contain body langage from many of the side characters and I wanted the thoughts of these two to stand out in particular. I haven't crafted exactly how the paragraph is going to read yet but just wanted to make sure I'm at least not messing up on the formatting, haha! Here is an example of how body language and non-verbal thoughts might be mixed: Susan stood there gaping at Steve, who turned to Joe, who bent down to tie his shoelace while his sister twirled her hair, pretending not to hear the comment at all. Upon entering the room, John looked at Paul with eyes that said, What is going on? Paul looked back, I have no idea. Again, this isn’t the way the passage is going to read but just trying to show how different methods will be mixed.
Personally, I would find a way to describe the look, rather than just stating the desired response of the look. Just writing it out like that kind of sucks the fun out of writing or reading it. Show, don't tell. Maybe better descriptors for looks and movements, also not just for the eyes, may help with describing your intended reactions from the characters. People are animated, and rarely conduct one movement or reaction at a time.
I like it as it is (no idea what's the proper way to do it in English, but it's ok by me) as long as it's only done once or a few times, depending on the size of the story.
Thank you, Rosacrvx! I looked around some more and found an answer. In case anyone out there is also wondering, the correct way seems to be " ". I found these quotes from newspapers (so I assume they are correct, haha). Frazier gave him a look that said “fair enough,”... - The Atlantic The next time I saw Tommy, I gave him a look that said “I know what you did” but I doubt it was registered. - Irish Times
I'm inclined to go against The Atlantic on this. Newspaper articles aren't written in the same way as works of fiction. I think the italics work fine, though it's a fairly blunt method to get the impression through, and should probably be used sparsely.
Agreed, I supposed that's one of the reasons why not many people know how to format it properly (assuming a proper format exists). I'm just using it as a quick way show to how two of my characters know each other so well, they are able to communicate with each other with a simple look, no verbal exchange required. This sets their relationship off from the rest of the group. If I made them communicate using body language, then that would mean any other character in the same scene would understand what is being communicated also, which wouldn't make it special.
Now that I think of it, I've used this myself! With quotation marks. One of my characters is trying to woo a deaf girl (she doesn't speak either). At one point it goes: ... but she gave him a look that said "yes, but I don't speak, so we'll have to understand each other differently"... Yep, I did use the quotation marks. But I only do this a couple of times because in this case the non-deaf character is subconsciously translating her facial expressions verbally to himself. As the relationship progresses this shouldn't be needed. Your example is a good time to use this as well. I've no problem with the italics. It can be confusing for the reader if you're also using italics for thoughts. It may sound as if they're telepaths. But if it's absolutely clear they're not telepaths, I see no reason not to use it.
Thank you, Rosacrvx! That's very helpful. I'm going to use the quotation marks so that it's more clear.
