1. John-Wayne

    John-Wayne Madman Extradinor Contributor

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    Lost in Translation

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by John-Wayne, Apr 20, 2018.

    So, I am at a scene where a third party must translate between two characters, my MC and the person who she is talking to. Now I did have my MC ask the translator to translate and then go into talking with the other Character.

    Do I need to have everything repeated by the Translator, or can I just do what I want to do? and just have the two characters talk back and fourth with readers assuming it's all being translated by the Translator? I'm just fearing it becoming tedious with having to reference the Translator every other dialogue.
     
  2. deadrats

    deadrats Contributor Contributor

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    Maybe dialog isn't the best approach to capture this conversation. Can you possibly write about what is being said and how it is being translated? It's just a thought because I can see your dilemma and do think it could get confusing both ways you mentioned handling this. It's hard to really know if it's working without reading it. This could be one of those things you have to try a few different ways to figure out what will really work. Good luck!
     
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  3. John-Wayne

    John-Wayne Madman Extradinor Contributor

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    right now it's a rough, so I'm not too worried at this moment . But yeah in the revision I need to figure out the best way to write this scene. I'll try it a few ways to keep it fluid while not confusing the reader
     
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  4. Sundowner

    Sundowner Active Member

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    It would definitely be more fluid if you wrote it as if the characters talked directly to each other in the dialogue, and it would also allow your story to be more immersive, I'd think. However, yes, you would want a reminder or two in there that the conversation is dependent on a translator. What I'd do is have the conversation stumble a few times; in the low-key parts of the conversation, I'd find ways to slip in a character saying "Can you tell them so-and-so..." to the narrator directly, or maybe even make the narrator respond with a laugh to something being said, just to remind the reader that they're still there. You definitely don't need to include the narrator in every single line of dialogue if they're not important.
     
  5. John-Wayne

    John-Wayne Madman Extradinor Contributor

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    Thanks, I will definantly keep that in mind when I do the revision. For now, in the rough I have where the MC talks, And then the translator speaks to the other person then translate to the MC, so basically he is speaking for the other Character.
     
  6. ChickenFreak

    ChickenFreak Contributor Contributor

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    I would be inclined to flesh out the translator just a bit as a character, and use them.

    Jane glanced at her boss, and raised her eyebrows at whatever he was saying. To John, she said, "Mr. Smith suggests that you may not be expressing yourself entirely accurately, and that any errors may result in a deterioration to the truth."

    John said, "He's calling me a liar?"

    Jane took a breath. "Mr. Smith suggests--"

    John broke in. "Fine. I understand. Would Mr. Smith care to accompany me to the museum, to see the evidence for himself?"

    John counted ten animated exchanges, and took two sips of coffee, before Jane turned back to say, "Yes."
     
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  7. John-Wayne

    John-Wayne Madman Extradinor Contributor

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    Thanks for the advice and the Translator is actually an established Character, i'm just using General terms here on the forums. In fact he was the focus of the prior scene, just before this one. which I've mentioned about in the Happiness Thread. :)
     
  8. soupcannon

    soupcannon Active Member

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    1. noun; the act or process of locating.
    One thing to consider is how accurately/faithfully the translator does her or his job. Is the translator biased in any way or does she have an ulterior motive?

    If not, I would recommend just sort of adding an occasional reminder. Maybe insert a line about the translator's position, perhaps his reaction to what he's translating, but otherwise, don't go through repeating every line. You shouldn't echo each statement.
     
  9. John-Wayne

    John-Wayne Madman Extradinor Contributor

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    No it's straightforward, the translator works for the person he is translating for. No ulterior motives.

    It's also a short, pretty one-sided, conversation. With the MC Pretty much telling the other person how it's going to be.
     

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