Am I The Only Person Who Has Trouble Writing For The Opposite Sex?

I understand that - it is part of why I find gay men easier to write in a Romantic relationship. I am not the most traditional romantic woman and not sure I would really know how to handle one. I know what to do with a man.

 

Really! Then could you tell me. I think I've forgot.

 

LOL well I have chatted up more men than I have women Mind you have also dated more gay men than I have straight ones somehow

 

Although it's entirely possible I am delusional, I don't think they're that different. We all have the same basic fears, hopes, dreams, and needs. We just express them differently. I don't think about how I write them, I just write them. I think my women have some (typically thought of as) masculine traits (because I do, I'm aggressive, self-reliant, logical (sometimes), fairly dominant) and most of my male characters have some (typically thought of as) feminine traits (because I think most men do, even if they don't always show it). I think it leads to a fairly good balance in a character. They are what they are. As long as you are consistent and follow their story, and they have reasons for being who they are, I don't think you can really go wrong.

My hope is that I manage to relate to both sexes by having universal needs, hopes, and dreams. Whether I succeed or not? That remains to be seen.

 

I can write men and women - I just cannot write a POV character that fancies a woman. I think it is more to do with how I write I like to be inside the MCs head almost feel like I am them - when the main POV character is male chatting up a woman always feels a little strange lol Even with Angus and Beatrice, Beatrice bullied Angus into it Gus and Iris I was able to switch between the two.

If I am doing a limited point of view and being a woman then chatting up a man is normal. If I am writing a POV as a man then it is harder to chat up a woman. I have a lesbian couple in one of my books but I couldn't write one as a POV character, despite living my teen years with my Mum and her partner. I find women intensly beautiful and attractive but I am not wired to fancy them either.

 

Hrm, I see what you mean I think. Maybe I have multiple personalities? Or maybe I really am delusional? I don't think I've had any problems with this so far. Even my really nasty violent men have been described as "chilling" and "evil". Maybe I should reconsider my personality. I thought I was a nice person, lol. (and yeah, we are hot , how can you write a man's POV without thinking that?)

 

Oh I can write weird, bizarre, I can murder people, punch them, beat them I just don't fancy women lol Heck i can write from the POV of a lewd fire extinguisher or a male fairy in leather hot pants. I just don't fancy women.

 

You mean "fancy" women *raises eyebrows for emphasis* or "fancy" writing about women? I think I'm confused, lol.

 

the raising eyebrow kind - I can write women just struggle when the POV character is male or female writing a romance with a woman. I find Angus&Beatrice/Gus&Iris far more difficult than Socrates&Nate/Joe&Tim

 

ROFL I don't either, but I can act like I do

 

lol I just don't write it very often I couldn't as much as I love them have Lilac and Lavender as my main charcters.

The only time I have to write it is with Angus and Beatrice, he never ever takes the lead. She walks into his bedroom when he is sick and naked (he has serious body issues and was poisoned the night before almost died) and tells him he is marrying her lol Its about right for the rest of their relationship. The only time he got a bit bold - he was shot at with a poisoned arrow lol It missed but it was the last opportunity he got to be in charge.

 

I think it's about perspective, for me anyway. Masculine characters are more analytical and feminine ones are more emotional (whether they are men or women) so for instance, if a feminine character is dressing to go out on a date they are looking to solicit an emotional response from the person they are dressing for which will show in their thoughts and actions. A masculine character is looking for a more analytical response, and will act and think based on that. The more masculine they are the more heavily they lean in that direction. That's just my opinion though.

 

This ^ is the the best advice I could give you.

Also, what Elgaisma said. "Casting" characters helps you to paint their images in your head and you can also find inspiration in their facial expressions and mannerisms.

 

More textile?

 

I meant analytical... Duh moment.. lol. That whole post was a mess rofl. I was reading medieval stuff for chacotaco's post and made a mess of it It's fixed. I am not, apparently, good at multi-tasking.

Besides, I really think plaid guys are hot. The paisley ones are a little weird...

 

See I never really did dates - sort of went out with friends that knew me. Never felt huge urge to dress different to how I normally did in a situation. Didn't need the emotional response I already had that, I knew the person and knew what to expect. I am the most unromantic person I know lol I tend to write solid, fun but very unromantic relationships. The other thing I don't write well is broken relationships - I can write fights but even with jealousy etc there is a strong sense of actually they are going to weather this.

Only scene I have preparing for a date Socrates litters the bed trying on different clothes, he's panicking at 149 has never been on date before.

 

I was just using that as an example, but I see what you mean I guess. I think it applies in most situations where people interract though.

 

I guess I think it would just involve for me too much thought about individual characters, I tend to write them and create them more from the heart than the head. When I write it feels more like subconscious functioning than anything.

 

It does for me too. It's automatic for me. *shrugs*