1. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Can you feed a live human to a green anaconda?

    Discussion in 'Research' started by KaTrian, Sep 9, 2016.

    ... preferably feet-first. Also, I assume it takes a while for an anaconda to gulp down the body 'cause it'd be awesome if my character didn't die, not very quickly anyway.

    The victim's about 5'9 and 170lbs or thereabouts. The anaconda would probably have to be very hungry.

    I'm trying to get an idea how fantastical/realistic this is, and so far neither Google nor YouTube has given me a satisfactory answer.

    So... any snake enthusiasts here? :p
     
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  2. Sack-a-Doo!
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    Sack-a-Doo! Contributing Member Contributor

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    There are documented cases of alligators being eaten by snakes (boa constrictors, I think) so if the snake is big enough, I don't see why not.

    It's also possible—as in one case—that the snake would burst and die before finishing its meal.
     
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  3. Scot
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    Scot Active Member

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    Anacondas go months between meals, and therefore only eat when hungry. I suspect your unfortunate victim would be asphyxiated first in the snakes coils before being eaten.
     
  4. Malisky
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    Malisky Fuzz Overdriver Contributor

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    Sure you can, but then again beware of the loose ends. Nobody must find out. :p
     
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  5. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    Big snake enthusiast. :)

    The size isn't a problem; a large (and therefore old) anaconda could swallow a human man. It would take several hours.

    But no, this isn't possible, for two reasons:

    1. Snakes always eat head first.
    2. Constrictors like anacondas crush prey to death before beginning to eat. Even if the human was unconscious, the snake would sense the breathing and crush him.
     
  6. Malisky
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    Malisky Fuzz Overdriver Contributor

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    Makes sense. (I always eat the heads of the little fishes first too). Think about it. If the legs where spread apart, it would be very complicated for the anaconda to swallow the man vertically.
     
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  7. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    Yep. If you imagine it eating a deer or capybara or something like that back-legs-first, you can see its forelegs snagging on the anaconda's mouth and the snake having to give up on the meal. Going head-first ensures everything goes in in a tube-like shape. And also, since they're usually eating furry creatures, the fur gets smoothed down as they go and doesn't create unnecessary friction.
     
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  8. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Okay, I started to envision the situation... and since I really need the guy to get swallowed feet-first and uncrushed, I can't see how the snake handler could keep the anaconda from trying to constrict him. So basically, would this situation pan out as follows: the crazy anaconda owner thought he could torture a person by slowly feeding them to his new pet, but the snake won't cooperate and accidentally-intentionally crushes the victim to death? Wouldn't that be the likeliest end result or is there any way that could be avoided?
     
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  9. Sack-a-Doo!
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    Sack-a-Doo! Contributing Member Contributor

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    Not to mention: the legs on most creatures fold in that direction, too. Very convenient. We were all designed so snakes could eat us from the head down... very Garden of Eden, eh?
     
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  10. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    That is definitely the likeliest end result. One man can't control an anaconda of the size required to eat a human; generally, you need one handler per six-feet of snake, and that kind of anaconda would be 25-30 feet long.

    The only possible (and very far-fetched) way you could do this would be to simulate a method some bushmen use to capture African rock pythons. You would have to immobilise the victim to stop him thrashing, tie his legs together and his arms to his sides so he's a tube-y shape, then get the anaconda in some sort of tunnel and stick the victim's tied legs into the tunnel's entrance, blocking the anaconda's way. If the snake was hungry enough, and unable to get around the victim to constrict him, he might start eating.

    I think there's a video of this out there... I'll see if I can find it.

    Edit: Well, that was easy! The description says this is an anaconda... I think it's a rock python, but it doesn't really matter anyway:

     
  11. Wreybies
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    Wreybies The Ops Pops Operations Manager Staff Contest Administrator Supporter Contributor

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    Crushing the victim is pretty much the guaranteed scenario if the snake choses to engage at all. An anaconda is always going to crush first. It's natural prey menu consists of creatures that could do it some serious harm if they were not incapacitated first. Capybara, like all rodents, have those massive incisors that, when used in defense, can be formidable. If the snake felt threatened, I could see it constricting as a defense and then not necessarily eating the dude, but if it were feeling peckish, as Tenderiser already noted, head-first is always the way. These things are pretty much programmed into the animal.
     
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  12. Malisky
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    Malisky Fuzz Overdriver Contributor

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    I like the way you think. :p
     
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  13. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    I can't take the credit! I'd be dead in three minutes flat in the wilderness. These hunters are geniuses.
     
  14. 123456789
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    123456789 Contributing Member Contributor

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    Question for my own sanity: Let's assume there's no drugs, or crazy snake handlers around. It's just a normal adult human and an anaconda- let's say it's the biggest anaconda there is. Is anyone here actually saying that the anaconda would be able to catch the human, strangle/crush, then eat it?
     
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  15. Malisky
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    Malisky Fuzz Overdriver Contributor

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    Yes.
     
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  16. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    I already envisioned the guy getting tied up, but it didn't occur to me they could use a tube to keep the snake from crushing him. :superthink:

    I don't mind if this is far-fetched or if it's suspending the reader's disbelief close to the snapping point as the story is really quite comedic, but I want to retain at least a fraction of plausibility, like, "if the stars are aligned just right, I can buy it." But I'm also prepared for "this is fucking ridiculous." :rofl:
     
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  17. 123456789
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    123456789 Contributing Member Contributor

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    I don't believe you.
     
  18. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    For added comic effect, you could have the anaconda spit him out a few hours later. Very common in snakes, especially after a large meal. :D
     
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  19. Malisky
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    Malisky Fuzz Overdriver Contributor

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    I don't care. :p
     
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  20. Shadowfax
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    Shadowfax Contributing Member Contributor

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    Q:
    How fast do anacondas move?
    A:
    Quick Answer

    On land, anacondas are capable of reaching up to 5 miles per hour. In water, anacondas have the ability to maintain a speed of 10 miles per hour. If stalking prey, they have a tendency to move at 8 miles per hour.



    [​IMG]
    Credit: Cristóbal Alvarado Minic CC-BY-2.0
    Full Answer
    Anacondas live near rivers, lakes and swamps. In most circumstances, they live alone. Water is their main escape method when confronted with danger. Rather than attacking, they often choose to slide into the water unnoticed.

    The largest documented anaconda to date was 28 feet, with a girth of 44 inches. The average size of an anaconda is 20 feet, long and 300 pounds. Anacondas give birth to live young, with between 24 to 35 snakelets in each spawn.



    Now, I could maintain around 8 mph for an hour...faster if a snake was after me!...but that's on a paved surface, not crashing through jungle terrain...I'd suggest that on its home turf, an anaconda would have no major difficulty with catching an adult male most of the time - Mo Farah might make a better fist of getting away, but then there's not enough meat on him to make a good dinner!

    And it's nearly twice my size, so is likely to beat me in any test of strength.
     
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  21. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    Definitely. The largest "pet" snake I've had was six and a half feet, maybe five inches in diameter, and she was a test of my strength. When she was really determined to squeeze herself around something, I had a real struggle to disengage her. Snakes are pretty much pure muscle.

    ETA: Also, "snakelets" is such a cute word.
     
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  22. Wreybies
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    Wreybies The Ops Pops Operations Manager Staff Contest Administrator Supporter Contributor

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    Images of John Voight being horfed out in one of those Anaconda films.... :blech:
     
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  23. 123456789
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    123456789 Contributing Member Contributor

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    They are pathetic.
     
  24. Tenderiser
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    Tenderiser Not a man Contest Administrator Contributor

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    @KaTrian should watch it for research and invite me, I'll bring popcorn.
     
  25. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Hah! A brilliant idea. And thanks for finding the clip. Oh my God, I wouldn't want to be that bait... But that was actually better than the film Anaconda. :p

    Okay, so I need several snake handlers, a tube, a tied up and possibly naked victim if the bad guys really want to have a lark, and a hungry big-ass rock python or anaconda. Ain't this shaping up nicely. :ohno:

    What kind of effect does snake goop (whatever is inside them) have on human skin?
     
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