1. Sarah Everheart
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    Sarah Everheart New Member

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    How soon?

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by Sarah Everheart, Feb 8, 2015.

    Alright, so so far I've introduced my main character as a nice guy. He's completely devoted to this girl named Mira and has been for some time now, three years. He's the meek type, unassuming, innocent, embarrassed easily, flustered. He goes on an exploration and toughens up some on the outside and gets stronger, but overall he's still the same guy just a bit more steady.
    When returning to Mira after this long journey he stays the night at a cabin and there's this girl there. I already plan for him to have some sexual attraction to her, but not as much as his pure love for Mira. I have nothing planned to happen yet, but he does have thoughts about this girl.
    To put the long story short the girl traps him there in the basement of the cabin and doesn't let him go, bit more to it, but that's the quick sum up.
    I want him to be aroused by her and attracted to her, but it's not the love at first sight. So finally onto my question.

    How soon is too soon to have him be interested in her?
    Keep in mind he's a nice sweet guy and everything, I'm not so sure it would be right for him to be interested in her sexually when they first meet, but then the girl traps him and I don't really see him having Stockholm syndrome or anything. But I don't want him to just look at her and want to screw her.
    So perhaps something along the lines of hinting at it when they first meet and then it begins to come out more as they interact?
    Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
     
  2. BayView
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    BayView Contributing Member Contributor

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    Do you mean she literally takes him prisoner?

    And you want him to become attracted to her AFTER that, and not call it Stockholm Syndrome?

    That'd be a pretty hard-sell, for me. If there's minimal initial attraction when he first sees her, the only reason to get more attracted to her would be growing affection, right? And why would that grow toward someone who's holding him prisoner?

    If it's necessary that he be attracted to her, I'd have the attraction hit him right away. She's gorgeous and sexy and in a world where he wasn't running home to The One, he'd be all over this one.
     
  3. Sarah Everheart
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    Sarah Everheart New Member

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    It's a fantasy story and there's a whole big plot but I always make my posts way too long when explaining so I was trying to give the bare bones. Yes, she literally takes him prisoner in the basement of her home and will not let him escape.

    Well, that's what I'm debating here is when he should first get attracted to her. It's not Stockholm Syndrome no. This is why I'm having trouble. He's not falling in love with his captor. It is just a physical attraction to her in purely the most animalistic and sexual based form.

    Yeah that's what I'm thinking is that it happens initially, but the thing I'm worried about is that my character comes off in the wrong way. He's in the middle of running home to The One, but he has to find a place to stay the night, which is what leads him here. I don't want to make the character to seem like some kind of asshole player and be like "DAMN YOU'RE SEXY!!" I've already established him as a nice sweet guy devoted to his The One. But I need him for plot to be attracted to this girl.

    any thoughts?
     
  4. BayView
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    BayView Contributing Member Contributor

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    JUST attracted, or does he act on his attraction?

    If he doesn't act on it - have him find her attractive before she imprisons him. I mean, just because someone's in love doesn't mean he goes blind or stops even noticing other women. He sees she's beautiful and sexy, has some lustful thoughts... and then stops having them once it becomes clear she's the enemy/psycho/whatever and locks him up.

    If you want him to act on his attraction? Post-imprisonment? You know your character better than I do, but it's hard for me to think of any sane person deciding to have sex with his captor just because she's so hot. I think there'd have to be some pretty dark psychological stuff going on, there. Don't call it Stockholm syndrome if you don't want to, but... it's not the behaviour of a standard brain, I wouldn't say.
     
  5. Sarah Everheart
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    Sarah Everheart New Member

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    Thank you. You've given me some things to think about here. And no, he never really acts on it, or so I don't have planned yet and probably won't plan to do any time either. I was just worried that him finding this girl sexy would make him seem like an ass or something.
     
  6. Mckk
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    Mckk Moderator Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Lol people find others sexy all the time - sexual urges don't disappear even if you're married with children. An ass would have to be the one who acts on those feelings when he's supposed to be with someone else. If it's purely physical, in any case, the guy should be attracted right away. If the girl's hot, there's no reason to delay the lustful thoughts.

    However, it seriously sounds like you're writing one of those non-consensual erotica novels...
     
  7. Sarah Everheart
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    Sarah Everheart New Member

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    Not at all. No bondage kinky tie em up stuff in this story.
    It's more a psychological thriller. Well, I'm attempting it. I've never written one before so this is my first....

    Alright then, Thanks.
     
  8. Mckk
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    Mckk Moderator Staff Supporter Contributor

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    So is there any reason why the captor has to be a hot girl that the guy is tempted by? It seems like an unnecessary subplot that's only confusing you rather than helping. If you wanted to make the imprisonment part of the psychological thriller aspect, constantly having to write how the guy's fending off lustful thoughts about his captor's just gonna be distracting. And in any case, if it's not a bondage kinky novel, there's really zero reason why a prisoner would continue to find his captor attractive once she actively imprisons him. Can you imagine the guy from Stephen King's novel finding Annie attractive...? (I forget what the book's called...)
     
  9. kfmiller
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    kfmiller Active Member

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    @Mckk - Misery. And that's what came to mind too.

    Having your MC attracted to his captor and thinking lusty thoughts about her just because she is "hot" is a bad trope that to me seems really unrealistic. Even if she is hot- she is holding him captive against his will! If you were writing an erotica or romance novel then I think it would make sense because of the genre. Since you're writing a psychological thriller I can't see that being a legitimate thought-pattern especially since you said he will not be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome. It's fine that at first he finds her attractive- that's normal. But the minute he gets locked up I would think those thoughts would cease. He might objectively still find her attractive but nothing beyond that.
     
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  10. KaTrian
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    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Staff Supporter Contributor

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    I'm not a guy, but... If she's hot, he's already attracted to her, and he doesn't perceive her as a huge threat (like is he physically stronger than her?), he might be willing to hop in the sack with her. With a reverse scenario it's more difficult to justify, imo, 'cause as a woman you can very often be overpowered by men, but a guy might feel less threatened by the chance of getting to bang the chick they find hot even if she's somewhat on the psycho side.

    The unattainable, unrequited love isn't a problem, imo. He's not committed to her, and love and sex can be kept separate, so I think if you establish before the imprisonment that he's got the hots for her, and she seems to respond, you should be able to justify it.

    Just be careful you don't turn it rapey. Even with the guy being the prisoner, tying him up, yanking his crank til he's ready for a ride and then going through with the act is questionable. Sure, some people get off on that, it is a fantasy after all, but at least I personally find it creepy. Not saying that's what you're doing though, just a forewarning of sorts.

    P.s. I can't speak for all men, of course. It's your character. After I wrote this I asked my hubby whether he agrees. He did, but of course there can be other ways of approaching this.
     
  11. Bryan Romer
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    Bryan Romer Contributing Member Contributor

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    If the female captor is attractive and deliberately sets about tempting him - making suggestive comments, giving "accidental" peeks, and so on, the man could become aroused and physically attracted as time goes on and he gets more desperate with nothing else to distract him. That doesn't imply that he likes her or even desires her, simply that an animal attraction can quite easily develop if she continually teases him.
     
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  12. Ivana
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    Ivana Contributing Member

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    My thoughts exactly.
     

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