1. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    Intimidation?

    Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Torana, Nov 29, 2007.

    Just curious as to what everyone here finds intimidating about other people. Is it the way people dress that intimidates you? Or is the way people act, speak? Maybe gangs and groups of people?

    The reason why I ask this is that I was told today that I am an intimidating person. It is not the first time I was told this either. I actually had someone from this forum tell me I was intimidating once.

    I know I can be intimidating at times. We all can that is for sure. But what I want to know is what everyone finds intimidating about others.

    Please share your thoughts on this.
     
  2. Domoviye
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    Domoviye Contributing Member

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    I've been told my size is intimidating.
    The person who told me this asked if I had ever considered hunching over to make myself look less intimidating. I kind of frowned and ignored her, since I had finally stopped hunching after 18 or 19 years.
    As for what I find intimidating, mostly size. If I see someone larger then me I get nervous, because that means they're bloody huge.
     
  3. Torana
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    Torana Contributing Member Contributor

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    See I don't find size intimidating at all. Mostly due to the fact that I am extremely tiny and everyone is bigger than me...scarily enough my 8 year old nephew is bigger than me....
    The thing that I find most intimidating is when people decide to play games with my head. I have had confrontations with bike gang members before and kind of went off at one that was absolutely massive when I was voting a few years back now.

    Although I would have to say anyone that is carrying a weapon I find extremely intimidating. Like a knife or gun. But then who wouldnt really.
     
  4. SeaBreeze
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    SeaBreeze Banned

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    Bosses. They make me nervous. Actually, most people do except those that I have known for years. It's mainly their, well I can't think of a better word at the moment, their aura. Strange but sometimes you get that sense of the wiggins. And people that don't tend to talk much, like my current boss. I can't read his moods at all which is Bitch. I tend to be empathic and sense how the others feel.

    Also maybe myself? Tasks intimidate me because I put heaps of pressure on myself. I have to get things perfect. I hate humiliation.

    But bosses are the biggest intimidation. I run away from them. Which isn't good for work efficiancy. I'm sure there are many other things that intimidate me. But oh well.
     
  5. SeaBreeze
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    SeaBreeze Banned

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    Meeting the prospective in-laws. I'm yet to meet my boyfriends parents and I'm scared ****less! LMAO!
     
  6. wordwizard
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    wordwizard Contributing Member

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    The girls in school who got in fights all the time were intimidating. Whose to say they were not going to jump you next because you looked at them to long when passing by.

    These days since I have been out of school for a few years I would say intimidating people are the smart people. The really smart people who ask you a question that is so simple to them, but you feel like they are talking greek. Makes you feel really small and very dumb. I swear they do that to you on purpose.

    I was told in high school that I was intimidating and I was only 100lbs! I think that has something to do with the fact that my face looks kind of mean when I relax it. Very wierd I know, because I am a kind, happy person...
     
  7. Jaclyn
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    Jaclyn Active Member

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    I have never been told I intimidated someone else because I'm such a quiet person sometimes. People who have nothing better to do than bring others down I actually find intimidating -- probably because I was bullied by these people in school. I should really change my attitude about them so I can start whooping some butt.
     
  8. Lemex
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    Lemex That's Lord Lemex to you. Contributor

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    It's the size of some one that gets me scared, and I find the Scotish accent intimidating for some reason.
    Groups of people I don't tend to have a problem with as I used to play Rugby and can outrun a number of people. And I have no problem with completly ignoring groups of people or mock some of them back. It's funny how quickly people's 'friend's' turn against them.

    I was once being followed by a group of Charvs who where shouting abuse at me like 'I'll kill you and piss on your grave' and 'When you die, I'll laugh' I didn't do anything to them, so I got the one who what shouting these things and punched him in the nose.
    His friends soon backed away and left me alone after that.
     
  9. Kit
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    Kit Contributing Member Contributor

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    Generally large groups of people (like usually in the streets) intimidate me more so than size would.
     
  10. Banzai
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    Banzai One-time Mod, but on the road to recovery Contributor

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    Same as the above, because of the general lack of intelligence of large groups. Observe:

    The Formula for Mob intelligence (I)

    I = i รท n

    where:

    i = the lowest individual intelligence in the mob
    n = the number in the mob


    :D
     
  11. Kit
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    Kit Contributing Member Contributor

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    Lmao... good point.
     
  12. Baywriter
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    Baywriter Contributing Member Contributor

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    I've always been told that I'm intimidating. I'm not sure what it is. It's not size. I'm a small person. 5'2" and about 102 pounds. But I think I just have a look about me or something. Anywhere I go, I walk with full and utter confidence, even if it's not what I'm feeling inside. I also have a lot of poise, or so I've been told. Maybe it's the whole cloak of confidence and flawlessness that I purposefully wear to hide all of my own insecurities. People just see the outside.

    As for me, I try not to allow myself to be intimidated, but I fail miserably when it comes to groups of scruffy looking men. Older or younger? Doesn't matter. My mind immediately tells me I'm in danger. I'm also intimidated by anyone holding a knife in his or her hand, even if it's someone from my own family. And the only other people I'm really intimidated by are my father and ex-stepfather.
     
  13. Cogito
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    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    I'm not very easily intimidated any more. I used to be when I was a kid, especially because I was always the "new kid" (we moved about every three years, on the average). The bad side: I was always being tested. The good side: I had several chances to start over.

    I pretty much stopped being intimidated after we moved out of Syracuse, NY. There, I was in a tough part of town, where 6th graders wandered around carrying switchblades and with cigarettes hanging out of their faces (circa 1965). After that year, I was not about to be a victim again.

    The next place was a town in upstate New York. I decided that the first bully who faced me, I would stand up to, no matter what. We had a one on one fistfight on the hill across from my house, overlooking the Hudson River. He bloodied my nose, I bloodied his. We shook hands and declared a truce. I had to face a couple more bullies in the next couple days, but that was mostly it. A few months later I ran into an 8th grader who was a considerably large bully. He had stayed back enough grades that he had 5 o'clock shadow and a driver's license.

    One day he snapped me in the back of the head in a crowd of kids waiting for the hall monitor to let up proceed (the hall monitor was waiting for the bell). I turned around, neither knowing nor caring who had done it, and punched. Maybe I did have some notion, because I hit high enough to leave a welt on his cheekbone.

    We were both hauled into the Principal's office. He was lectured, and I got paddled. But I felt good about it. I was no longer afraid of Jack Stacy. A week later he and one of his knuckle dragging buddies pulled over to the curb ahead of where I was walking, and stepped out of the car and walked toward me. I clenched my fists and started walking toward Jack. He shouted a couple threats, then THEY GOT BACK IN THE CAR AND DROVE OFF.

    From that day on, any time I encountered someone looking for trouble, I just stood my ground quietly, and looked them in the eye. Nearly always, Trouble decided to look elsewhere. (The one significant exception, a Wall of Meat I ran into outside a liquor store, is another story).

    It does help that I am 6'4" with training in several martial arts, but I still think the key is remaining calm and not showing fear.
     
  14. Frost
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    Frost Contributing Member

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    Im not really intimidated by any single person. I know how to fight enough (even if it does get dirty) that I'll be able to at least get away from an attacker. Especially seeing as how I did a whole heap of representative football, so I'm a quick runner. 100m in like 12.9 seconds. However, large gangs of peopl (especially maori's and aboriginals, if Im in my home town) at night do intimidate me. Usually I'm with a gang as well, so nothing happens, but I know what would if I were by myself.

    Im also dreadfully scared of spiders. There is one just chilling in the corner of the computer room at the moment; I've got a close eye on him let me tell you.
     
  15. The Freshmaker
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    The Freshmaker <insert obscure pop culture reference> Contributor

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    I find confidence intimidating. Probably because I have so little of it.

    Strangely enough, though, I've been told that I'm intimidating. It's hard to believe that anyone could be intimidated by someone who is 5'0" and 95lbs. But they are.

    I've analyzed this phenomenon, and I've come to this conclusion:

    When I speak around people I don't know, it's usually pretty bluntly and about something that I've observed. I guess my sense of humor and areas of interest aren't shared by many other people, because I usually get weird looks. And so I usually just stay quiet. I think it's my silent observation combined with the occasional dry comment that intimidates people, for whatever reason. Must come off as silent confidence or something.

    You get used to it, though, once you get to know me.

    Deep down, I'm horribly shy and scared of my own shadow. I've just gotten good at hiding it.
     
  16. Night Haunter
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    Night Haunter Banned

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    You'd be surprised.
     
  17. lessa
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    lessa Contributing Member

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    Strange but true.
    My family and people I know intimidate me.
    When I am in a crowd of people I will never see again I am confident and speak up and even act up.
    But if I am in town where I will see people later I am so quiet and unsure that I seem to be a shadow of myself.
    That has changed a bit since my father died. He was a verbal bully. And now in town I don't have to be good since both my children have left. I behaved like other people because the boys had to go to school and wanted part time jobs so a mother or father who stuck out was not a good thing.
    Now I say what I want because nobody can hurt me and if they do my husband will pick up the pieces.
    Principals always intimidated me. Until I found the secret. Crocodile tears and they caved completely.
     
  18. SeaBreeze
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    SeaBreeze Banned

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    LMAO!

    Beautiful people intimidate me. I was never one of the cool guys and wase pretty much an OMG, look at that fat loser and by fat, I was like, three sizes bigger than them? And that wasn't that fat!

    So the beautidul people, well, pretty on the outside beautiful people intimidate me. My Aunty is really pretty. And I keep waiting for her to turn into a nasty cow but she doesn't she's really nice.
     
  19. ILTBY
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    ILTBY Contributing Member Contributor

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    The way people speak to me is what has the ability to intimidate me most. If someone speaks to me in a condescending or arrogant manner, I'll feel very intimidated...also if someone dismisses everything I say to them I feel quite belittled.

    I'm already a very small and shy person with very low self esteem, so I'm intimidated quite easily. Basically, if I just feel out of place or somewhat ignored by the people I'm around I'll be intimidated. I'm really just intimidated by people with a lot of confidence who know their place in the world. I would love to have the confidence to feel like I belong.
     

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