1. rasmanisar
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    rasmanisar Active Member

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    I've finally figured it out...

    Discussion in 'General Writing' started by rasmanisar, May 11, 2016.

    It's taken a while, but I've finally realised what really annoys me about George RR Martin's writing style - he's a 'Teller'. He doesn't allow descriptions of the characters to be transmitted through good writing, he simply shoves the information in your face.

    Case point: "Mya had straw in her hair and a scowl on her face.'

    IMO this is a poorly formed sentence because it takes me out of the character's perspective and simply exposes information. Much better would be:

    "Mya scowled, pushing a wayward lock of hair out of her face and sending stalks of straw scattering across the doorway."

    Am I right, or am I being pedantic/hugely mistaken?

    #WhingeOfTheDay
     
  2. sprirj
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    sprirj Contributing Member

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    I prefer martinis version sorry. It's a bit of throw away info, it needs no more than a few words.
     
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  3. rasmanisar
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    rasmanisar Active Member

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    Granted, it's a little thing. But the thing about little things is that there's an awful lot of them. That kind of thing adds up, and eventually starts to detract from the overall piece IMO.

    Or maybe I'm just picking fault :rolleyes:
     
  4. Mumble Bee
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    Mumble Bee The writer formerly known as Chained. Contributor

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    Really, that's what bothers you about him, not how he keeps murdering everyone i love?
     
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  5. Aaron Smith
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    Aaron Smith Contributing Member Contributor

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    A lot of little things accumulates to something greater.
     
  6. Cave Troll
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    Cave Troll Bite the bullet, do your own thing. Contributor

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    Well that is enough a reason to skip past his work. No point in drowning oneself in another mans boredom. :supergrin:

    And for the rest of you complaining about why he kills off all the good characters (I stole this snippet from the webz, and he sums it up for you:supergrin:)

    As an author, Martin has also shown no mercy to his characters, killing off main characters and other favorites unexpectedly. Martin feels that he has "a certain moral obligation" to reflect the reality of war in his fantasy tales. "People die in wars. People get maimed in wars, and many of them are good, likable people who you would like to not see die," Martin once explained.

    Sounds like the kind of thing only an indulgent ass would do: You like this guy in my story? Well tough luck chum, I have to brutally murder them now.

    Final thoughts: I think I will sit comfortably back with my collection of Sci-Fi and Horror, where I know the author doesn't kill off the characters just to be an ass. :superlaugh:
     
  7. Steerpike
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    Steerpike Felis amatus Supporter Contributor

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    Same.
     
  8. peachalulu
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    peachalulu Contributing Member Reviewer Contributor

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    Telling is a technique more about timing and pace. Totally legit and necessary. If Martin was to make a big deal out of every scowl and straw in someone's hair his books would need their own zip code.
     
    Last edited: May 11, 2016
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  9. Mckk
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    Mckk Moderator Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Sorry, gonna agree with the masses here. Martin's version is far better. Your own tries far too hard. Everyone knows what a scowl looks like, and no one cares that the girl's hair is supposedly "wayward" - and wayward hair sounds weird anyway, like they're constantly actively rebelling against the head like the snakes on Medusa. And how much straw did you imagine this girl had on her hair that a little flick of it sends straw "scattering across the doorway"!? o_O That's just being melodramatic. It's a bit of straw, no biggie. No need to dwell on it.

    Was she someone important anyway?
     
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