If she can't handle you spending time (more, less or whatever) then screw her. A relationship is about two people being together and finding out what works. I have never heard of a relationship being in trouble because you want to or you actually do spend more time with someone (Esp from the womens side) I almos lost my misses early on because i was not spending enough time with her (Cause i wanted to play "cool,") If she want distance, give it to her. If you like her, then you just have to respect her wishes and hope everything is okay.
Can anyone help? My dad wants to wire me money for my birthday. He needs my account number and routing number to do this. We have the same last name. With this information could he withdraw money or use my bank account in any way?
Well, I guess the simple question you need to answer is: Do you trust your dad? If yes, go right ahead. If no, get him to send you the money in a card or as a cheque or by hand.
Well i'm not too sure. Do sign for your money/ enter a PIN? If it's either of them, as long as he doesn't forge your sig, or know your PIN, you'll be fine. I think.
Maybe I should explain more. I don't live with my dad, I live in another state. We have the same last name. My younger siblings do live with him, and I know (he doesn't know that I know) that he has used their information to put bills and things in their name. I don't know how deep it goes but I know they have had their credit ruined by him, and so has my mom. In the past he has had bank accounts in his brother's name. He has worked in loans (or lately pretends to in order to scam people) for a while now and knows how to run credit reports and things like that. Because he is my dad he probably knows or could get my social security number. So. I am paranoid not so much that he would withdraw money from my account, that would be immediately obvious, but that he could use my account for other purposes of which I can only vaguely conceive. Is it a bad idea for him to have my account number and routing number? I gave it to him in the past and nothing happened that I know of but it has changed since then. Also I'm wondering if there's any way to know if credit cards or bills are in my name that shouldn't be.
Ah. In that case, if he's done it before, don't give him ANY info. It's not likely that he will treat you any differently to your brothers.
My parents are getting divorced. I'm feeling really weird about it, because on one hand, I'm glad that I don't have to deal with my dad as much anymore, but I don't like the idea of things being different. I've got a friend whose parents have been divorced for years, and they're still good friends, and I think it'd be nice if my parents were like that, but I know that probably won't happen. My dad's cattier than a 10-year-old girl. And then there's my brother. He's 19 and autistic, and basically a NEET. He wants to live with my dad, and I think it'd be best for him. Dad's always trying to make him be more social, and he makes more money so it'd be easier to support him until he get a job. But Dad doesn't wanna take him. I don't know why - Dad keeps telling us that he's going to get an apartment real close by, and spend time with us and "be there" for us (whatever that means). So what difference would it make if my brother lived with him instead of near him? I don't know, it just frustrates me. It's bad enough Mom's gotta look after me until I graduate - she shouldn't have to support a goddamned NEET, when Dad makes more money than she does. But maybe that doesn't make sense. Maybe I'm just being bitter. I don't know, this feels too weird.
I am sorry that your parents are divorcing. I know that must be very difficult, and making the adjustments will take some time. I am more sorry about your attitude towards your brother. I was shocked that someone would call their own autistic brother a "goddamned NEET." I think I would become violent if someone called my autistic brother that. He is 27 and will never be able to work or support himself. I don't judge him on that. He does the best he can, and can't be expected to do what everyone else does. He isn't everyone else. The transition is as hard if not harder for your brother than for you. Being autistic, he probably finds a lot of comfort in the familiar and safe. That safety is shaken now. The parent who is willing to take care of him and his needs is the one that should be taking care of him. If your father doesn't want him, the situation would not be good for your brother regardless of money. Please, try to find some compassion and support for your brother.
like Carmina, I think it's your attitude towards your brother that makes me mord concerned. Divorce, is not the end of the world. In fact most of times I wish my parents would just divorce, but knowing that'll never happen....if they can't get along, it's better they separate. But your brother is one person, who thanks to his autism needs your support. I hope it's just bitterness colouring your words. And all the best for coping with your parents' divorce.
I know, I know, it's wrong of me to think that way about my brother. Maybe I'm just a bad person, but I can't help it. The ****er used to peek in at me while I was in the shower. He drilled a hole in the bathroom door, and after my dad covered it up he'd stick mirrors under the door. My parents said it was "natural at his age" to be "curious", but, ****, I was eleven. He doesn't do it anymore, and I know I should just forgive and forget. I mean, there're worse things that could happen, right? Guess I'm just overreacting.
Nonsense. This is a cop-out. It's our actions that make us bad, not the thoughts, which are often driven by emotion, that come to us. There is such a thing as choice, after all.
My grandmother is getting senile. Which is not the issue I am having a hard time with. My issue is that (even though I love her to bits) I am pretty much her caretaker. I drive her EVERYWHERE. When I say every where I mean.....she called me to help her take back her cans....which only amounted to 3 dollars. It is so hard to say no. She is not manipulating me, she just has noone to turn too. My mother is a alcoholic/drug addict who has no car and "borrows" money off my grandmother who has barely enough money to get by. All this borrowing resulted in my grandmother now having an allowance, so she only is able to have a certain amount of money in her account at a time. All my aunts and uncles live out of town. I really really love my grandmother but when I have to take my her grocery shopping and it takes ALL day because she is drunk (yes she has a drinking problem too, but shes old so noone feels a need to do anything about it)then it gets a tad frusterating to say the least. I am about to leave to take her to the store to buy new glasses that she lost. (I seen my mom with them.....she denies having them) anyways. I need some sort of relief. I want to do all these things for my grandma, but not every single day..... I don't actually have any clue what to do. I know things could be a lot worse, but I guess I need to convince her to try and get all her errands ready for one day....but being senile....it is a bit hard for her. sending out an S.O.S.
I am so sorry to hear that you carry the weight of this burden. Believe me when I say that I understand. I drive my grandmother to most of her appointments and to get her groceries and so forth. She loves a drug store. My grandmother is as much a mother to me as my mom. Sometimes she tests my patience, though I never let her see it. The fact that you don't have anyone living around you who is competent to help, makes it harder on you. I don't know about your area, but where I live (big city) there are resources for transportation. If a doctors visit falls on a day that I can't take her, my grandmother uses them for doctor appointments and eye exams. As for everything else, I have told her that she has to pick from certain days of the week. These are days I can devote to her. At her age, she sometimes pulls a drugstore or food run on me. If I am able I do, if I can't then I gently explain why. (Unless it's an emergency) On the days that we spend together, I try and make special. We go out and have dinner and spend the time just us. It is something I know I will treasure when she's gone. I hope this helps.
She is such a sweet lady that it is so hard to say no. I am afraid she will try walking if i don't take her, and she is way to frail to be doing that....but determined because she has tried before lol! She is trying to learn how to use the bus. A lady from the valley came over this morning to teach her how. They went for a ride on the bus together and next week my grandma will take the bus herself and the lady will drive behind the bus to make sure she figures it out on her own. I personally do not like the idea of my gran taking the bus. In case something happens and no family are around to help. We will see I suppose. Thanks for the response. I hope I can work up the guts to say no soon lol
As strange as it sounds I miss exams. I graduated in May and find myself missing everything school related. Even the stress that comes with mid-terms and cramming... I have nothing to stress me out anymore quite like the high I got from studying and then Ace-ing them. You all will do fine, GOOD LUCK
I don't really know what to do, you guys. I'm having friendship problems. One of my best friends and I have gotten into, idk what to call it. Our conversations are starting to become like this: I say something. She tells me to stop talking about because she doesn't care and doesn't want to hear it. She says something. I'm still upset because she just told me to shut up, and say that I don't care about her thing. She says that she deserves to talk about her thing, because I talk about my things all the time. I say that that's bullcrap. She says it's not. Eventually. One of us stops and just doesn't say anything, until one of us decides to pick a new subject, and then it starts over. It upsets me, and I want it to stop. Help?
Maybe try listening to her and let her speak? Perhaps you do talk alot about yourself all the time and don't realise it. But rather than biting back, ask her why she's being so bluntly rude towards you - that's out of order.
Seconded. Try to talk to her about it, and also try to make a conscious effort to really listen when she's talking about something. Then, if she keeps up being rude like that, you'll know for sure that it's not because of anything that you're doing wrong.
This friends seems to be in a bad way. People i've come across like this, i have learnt to be an ear. Listen to what they say, nod, agree and comment if they ask. These stages move on after a period of time. But sometimes people just want to talk aloud with someone there, they probably want to hear themselves not have people talk like they think they know whats going on (and im sure they do, but not to the [person wanting to detox, if you know what i mean) That said, on the other hand i witness another side of things. My girlfriends daughter is 14, almost 15 and she has a HUGE problem. She hasent realised that the world does not evolve around her yet, and a lot of her vain cponversations are her, me, i etc. And well....a few of her friends (ex-friends) have had enough of that (those that have got passed that stage of "its all about me". I've told her a good friend listens, and not only talks. But she doesnt think its very wise or useful.
Right, OK, so I'm living in Halls right now, and there is a girl in my flat who loathes me - and for the life of me, I can't work out why exactly. What is weird is I help out around the flat, I buy toilet paper, wash up, clean the place, and I keep myself to myself (I'm a very reserved character, this is to be expected) yet she seems to really detest me. Even going as far as to come into the lounge where me and my friends where hanging, playing some games and chatting, and she talked to everyone but me. Then she walked out the room - and I could see her in my peripheral vision, over the pages of the book I was reading - giving me the biggest evil eye I've ever had in my entire life. I don't know what I've done, and I've asked some of my friends for input, but they all say the same two things: either 'She is a bitch, forget her' or 'She might like you, but be trying to hide it' which is something of a failed hypothesis I think.
I'd go with the "she's a bitch" option. It's a trait that, unfortunately, a lot of people seem to have.
I second Banzai. Ignore her. If she's going to act like that when you've done nothing to deserve it, then she's not even worth the energy it takes to think about her.
She seems to be investing a lot of attention on you. I suspect she probably is attracted to you, but I bet even she only is aware of negative emotions toward you. It's messed up, though. Who needs the drama?
