1. natsuki
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    natsuki Active Member

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    Which sentence is right?

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by natsuki, Sep 5, 2010.

    In a story I am writing I want to say that a woman was in a restaurant and a guy met her there. I'm stuck between the following sentences:

    She came into his direction.
    She came to his direction.

    Is one of these right or am I wrong in both? :)
     
  2. Melzaar the Almighty
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    Melzaar the Almighty Contributing Member Contributor

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    Wrong in both, I'd say... Mind you, I'd go for a longer sentence just 'cause I like rambling.. Hmm.

    How about... "She was in his path" or "He saw her and changed direction, walking up to her with [characteristic description]" or... Hmm. I'm not 100% of the image you're trying to convey anyway. :p
     
  3. Elgaisma
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    Elgaisma Contributing Member Contributor

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    I agree the sentences are both confusing I thought you meant:

    'She came into his line of sight.'
     
  4. natsuki
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    natsuki Active Member

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    Would "she walked to his direction" or "she walked to him" be right? I used the verb "come" before, but it is confusing.

    I know this sentence is actually a very simple one, but I am revising my story and can't find a better way to express myself.

    Thank you for your answers.
     
  5. Wreybies
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    Wreybies The Ops Pops Operations Manager Staff Contest Administrator Supporter Contributor

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    If the meaning you are after (I was a bit confused with the two examples) is the idea that She began walking in a manner that caused her to gain proximity to the Him, then a simple She walked toward him. would suffice.

    If Portuguese uses the word direction the way it is used in Spanish, then I understand the confusion. In English, the word direction does not have the same use as it does in the Latin languages. In English, the word direction almost always connotes movement or the act of moving. In Spanish the word dirección is more often used as a stationary idea.
     
  6. Melzaar the Almighty
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    Melzaar the Almighty Contributing Member Contributor

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    I guess "she came in his direction" would show she was walking toward him, if that was what you needed? Hmm.
     
  7. natsuki
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    natsuki Active Member

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    I think that was my problem. I will change to "she walked toward him". Such a simple sentence, and yet I couldn't see it.

    Thank you.

    Yes. I hadn't expressed myself very well before :)
     
  8. Melzaar the Almighty
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    Melzaar the Almighty Contributing Member Contributor

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    Well, you said the guy met her there, rather than she meets him, so it sounded like he was the one approaching her... Got really confusing after that... Heh. :p
     
  9. natsuki
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    natsuki Active Member

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    Oh, I just saw it now... didn't notice before, no wonder it was so confusing.
    Very stupid of me! :eek: (I wanted an ashamed smile, but couldn't find)
     
  10. Melzaar the Almighty
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    Melzaar the Almighty Contributing Member Contributor

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    *pats* S'okay, we all say such things. :p
     
  11. KellyMichelle
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    KellyMichelle Member

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    Hmmm
    I'd say something like
    'She was there, directly in his eyeline'
    or
    'She was walking, slowly, in his direction'

    Just a few ideas for you to experiment with? Short like the two you came up with too!
     

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