Personal Life

  1. Military Youth Camp Days

    When I was a teenager I attended a week long military youth camp. There I learned a lot about myself. I learned that I sucked at guiding an airplane bomb run. (I bombed the wrong city. In theory, not practice.) I got to shoot a .22 long. A cartridge got stuck in the loading mechanism, I thought something was wrong so I raised my hand and the instructor came. He just used force to guide the cartridge into where it was supposed to be. I thought the damn thing would explode in my face if I used...
  2. Been a while

    It's been a while, since I posted here. My boss has been a slave driver of late, which is an odd statement since I am my own boss. My trilogy is on the back burner for now. Book 1 has a word count that is acceptable, Book2 is still a bit shy of acceptable, and Book 3 needs a lot of work to be done. But I ran out of gas with the project, and my work schedule, so let it sit for a bit and let myself recharge for that project. I have started a new project that is coming along nicely. I tossed...
  3. The Death of My Father

    My father killed himself when I was around ten years old. I can not remember the date nor even how old I actually was. Family members are the ones who need to remind me of the date and my age when I ask about his death. It struck me hard, I was nearly apathetic and very silent for many months afterwards, much contrary to my usual personality. When he died, it was like an awakening to a harsh truth. That everyone you will ever meet and love, can and will eventually perish. This set me back...
  4. Lithium Ion batteries (rechargeable) and safety

    Recently I was looking into getting an eBike and ran across the fact that many of them are known to suddenly burst violently into flames, either while charging, while riding, or just while sitting somewhere. And not only that, but the flames can't be put out. I posted some info about it on the message board a while back, but I've been looking into it more and I've found some better info now. I mentioned on the Science thread that I have a few flashlights with rechargeable lithium-ion...
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  5. What no one tells you about Online Dating .....

    One thing is that there actually are different types of online dating. :superconfused: So generally, people go online, they make their profiles and either try to fill out a bunch of stuff, or they say nothing at all. However, the intent is generally universal, you are trying to meet someone. Right? Obviously, what you are looking for can be different, as in ...just someone to talk to, just someone to hook up with, someone to love, someone to spend the rest of your life with. I'm sure most...
  6. Southpaw

    This morning I spent the first hour of my day practicing on the keyboard. I actually like starting my day out one of two ways. Either practicing the keys or working out. I know seems like very different ways to start a day out. However, it is what I enjoy. Anyway, so this morning it was the keys. :-) Since I had successfully played ' The longest time' at my friends, Let's call her Sarah, house Sunday night when we were hanging out without needing my sheet music. I decided I had at the...
  7. Yesterday

    openly saying what is on my mind has never been easy. I used to keep journals when I was younger. But haven't had one since I was 13/14. So, this experience could get awkward lol. Yesterday I was working on rewriting Dark, since I received so much good, helpful feedback from people on here. Well, my best friend was at work, and started texting me because it was extremely slow and boring. (she is a bartender) So, I suggested I come just sit up there with her, I could bring my laptop,...
  8. Hard to Explain

    Describing a dream, no matter how moving to the teller, invariably brings feigned interest and stifled yawns from the most patiently listening audience. The magic of the dream, its spell, cannot be captured in the outside world; it comes from deep within the dreamer. Vivid imagery and intense emotion can't be easily, if at all, captured by words and the logic of telling. It's the same with my recent sojourn back to western Nebraska. Most people have no idea of what that landscape is...
  9. Cue the Eerie Music

    While reading cultural anthropologist Loren Eisely's autobiography, All the Strange Hours, a book that had mysteriously appeared on my bookshelf years after I thought I had given it away or lost it I came upon this entry: "In the year 1975 twenty-one people died in a air crash at the Mayan religious center of Tikal in Guatemala. Strange, is it not, that twenty-one tourists born over a thousand years after the fall of the Mayan Empire, and only aware of it because of the archaeological...
  10. Awakening

    Awakening I don’t know where I came from, and I don’t know where I’m going when I die. But for this brief interlude, I am here. My body is my home. I have a sense of home in myself. Each day brings new learning. I awaken to being wrong, I awaken to being right, I awaken to dawning truths I had never considered. In sleep, there are limits. Blind spots in our perception. How can you answer the question – What if? – if your senses are not on alert, if you are not fully awake? Did you even...
  11. Figuring Out My Relationship with God

    Figuring Out My Relationship with God Don’t know what’s got into me but I want to go back to church. I used to go to mass every Sunday with my mother and it felt like going home sitting beside her in the pew in the same church in which I was baptized, confirmed and got married. But then Covid hit and we stopped going. And then we entered the worst part of my husband’s battle with MS which ended with his death in September of 2021, and my faith was shook up bad. There was no God in what...
  12. Honestly, It's Not for Everyone

    That’s Nebraska’s current tourism slogan, and it seems perfect to me. Most people from the state (at least among those I know) will freely admit there are no obviously sublime sights, no real mountains, no towering redwoods, no massive canyons, only one real waterfall (and it ain’t much by Niagara standards). But then they will say something like, “it’s got a lot of subtle beauty.” And so it does. I was born in ranch country, way out in the northwest corner of the state, in the shadow...
  13. All I can do

    All I feel I do is endure. There is no way out of this thing, this experience of awareness. All the pain, and all the pleasure passing by while I watch it. Everything is happening in one space, and I don't even know where or what it is. What I am. The thoughts that come up are the same, I don't choose which ones arise, I only notice some of them as they do. Some are more viral than others, and the whispers of others often wiser. No wonder this idea of the angel and devil on the shoulder is...
  14. Still not dead…

    I don’t even know when the last time is I logged on here, let alone posted content, reviewed others’ content, or acted like a member of this community. I’m still alive, still writing. In fact, I’ve started taking a class from David Gerrold, which is exciting. In case anyone’s interested, I’ve launched a new website with a series of shorts I’ve been working on, called Tales of the West. Stop on by if you care.
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  15. Decaying Mind

    Sometimes it feels like my mind is slipping. Too many universes to keep track of. Or perhaps my psychosis sickness is making itself heard... not literally. I just feel so stupid at times. Like my mind is really decaying. I recently comissioned two artists for illustrations outside their expertise. It only occurred to me to search for the right artists after I had comissioned the first two. What the hell, mind? What the hell is going on? Years ago, I would not have made that mistake. I seem...
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