When the Tree falls...

It's amazing how the life span of a tree.. it can start off as a little seed; and it can grow into this Beautiful statue. nature made if we are lucky. we are lucky for the things that are man made anymore. we are only lucky enough to experiance the few that actually bring most people peace. while some choose to run away from the good things they could experiance, what it takes most plants to grow goes the same way for people. the way nature Loves. I know Love it just sounds ridiculous to some. it even gets mocked and victimized it seems like. because that's how most people use it. to get what they want. I always thought everything I had worked to protect for so long was because of Love. that it was okay to let these people in your life to show you that you cared because of what you did for them and how they reacted. but not many if any seemed to be bouncing up and down to return the favor. if anything they seemed to just drive the nail deeper. people use being vulnerable as a weapon. when someone finally breaks down everything they built to let someone in they think they can trust only to have them burn it down. It's like cutting down all these trees only to throw the paper in the trash. all that time to grow only to get knocked down. I feel like I have found myself in a similar situation it seems like way to often only to find myself picking myself back up to mosey along. throw myself back in the wind to the next thing. I thought I had finally gotten it right though. taking it slow and realizing that time has a weird but heart wrenching way of working.. how is it that evil can happen in a matter of seconds but it has to take forever to fall in love? they want to give up on the first sign of someone caring even if to them its taken time in their new life to realize they need to make the changes if they want to have a healthy love. yet sometimes healthy doesn't always mean pretty. I don't think its about the things you avoid working through but but everything you manage to find yourself overcoming. yet where does that line cease. where is the love between giving up too easy and giving it your all to fight for the one you love? love seems to be like a lot of other things all these different answers for what it could be yet how can we be so sure? The first person I felt like was actually in love with and i couldn't find myself to tell them cause I was scared that'd be the reason he run, but it seems like when you try and play the stubborn angle; then they find a reason to scoot. Does love make you run? and if so why do we get so afraid of the most real good thing we can feel as humans? is it because it feels just as bad when we lose it? my heart feels some type of way right now. and it sucks. for so long you were the reason it felt better.