Milhouse2011 is not an established writer, nor is he a self published writer. In fact he's not even an aspiring writer. You could say that Milhouse2011 is a rare specimen known as the unwilling writer. Milhouse2011's life up to this point has been a domino chain of epic failures, bitter disappointments and mild defeats in various endeavours in his attempt to forge a life of success. Growing up, Milhouse2011 was noted for his talents in writing at school and among his family and peers. One could say that Milhouse2011 had his talent for writing encoded into his DNA. However, Milhouse2011 had other ideas in mind for his life and career. Because of this, Milhouse2011 came to the conclusion that God decided to make his life one disaster after another until he finally cracked and became either a writer or a priest. After careful consideration, Milhouse2011 decided that writing was the lesser of two evils as the priesthood meant no longer getting laid and a paycheck less than a 15 year old would earn at McDonalds. If Milhouse2011 was to gain anything from being an unwilling writer, it's the fact that he can vent his spleen on anything he feels like writing about and not care about having his intelligence insulted by "feedback". Ironically, it's when Milhouse2011 is in a dark place emotionally that writing becomes as simple as poetry. Any other time, Milhouse2011 sits at his computer PRAYING from something that looks like a comprehensible sentence to materialise on screen before he pokes his eyes out with a blunt pencil. Milhouse2011 believes that writing is neither a talent or the result of hard work. Writing, as defined by Milhouse2011, can be achieved by anyone with a writing apparatus and a basic command of the english language.
Hello Milhouse, Welcome to the Creative Writing Forums. Please read How to Use the Writing Workshop before you try to post there. Posting your own writing for people to comment on should not be among the very first things you do here anyway. It is worth taking the time to see what other people have done to improve their writing, and see if some of it applies to your writing as well. That is part of why we require members to review other members' work before posting their own for review. On the other hand, there are no restrictions, other than content and copyright rules, on showcasing your work in your member blog. Also, be aware that posting a piece of writing on any public site, including this one, will greatly diminish your chances of selling it for publication. Removing the writing later does not alter that fact - once posted, it is irreversibly considered published. So do not post anything more than a small excerpt of any piece you are planning to submit for publication. If you haven't explored the site yet, you should probably do so soon. Newcomers often gravitate to the Lounge, the Word Games, or the Writing Workshop, but there is much more to be discovered if you poke in the corners. Remember to check out our FAQ as well, and be sure to read through the forum rules, too, to avoid any misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Respect for one another is our principal mandate. As for the Writing Workshop, new joiners often wonder why we do things a bit differently on this site than on other writing sites. We emphasize constructive critique as a vital writing skill. Training your eye by reviewing other people's work helps you improve your own writing even before you present it for others to see. Therefore, we ask members to review other people's writing before posting work of their own. We also impose a two-week waiting period before you may post writing for critique, to give you time to become familiar with what is expected and how the site operates. The Writing Workshop forums on this site, therefore, are true workshops, not just a bulletin board for displaying your work (and on that note, please only post each item for review in one Writing Workshop forum). Also, please use the same thread for all revisions and additional excerpts from the same piece of writing. See this post, Why Write Reviews Before Posting My Work? for more information. And while you're looking around, don't forget to check out the RPG forum for improvisational fiction. Also try our Weekly Short Story Contest and Weekly Poetry Contest. They actually run more than one week apiece, but any member may enter, and all members are urged to vote for their favorites. Enjoy your stay here, and have fun!
Millhouse, I can tell you're already a great writer and have demonstrated mastery of the third person usage. Welcome to WF. You'll fit right in.
