Half of you will know what I'm doing with this. The the other half will be offended or confused or tone me out because I swear a lot, but this isn't for you. It's for the first half. What are we doing? We're talking about writing. Because I see you there, complaining about that book you haven't written. What's the problem? Story won't come together? People don't want to read your story? Finding time to write is hard? Let's cut the shit and talk about something important, and you can start by putting that thing you're enjoying, that thing you're doing instead of writing, down. That stupid shit you're doing, that thing that isn't writing? Put. It. Down. I am not fucking with you. What's your name? Yeah, YOU. You call yourself a writer, you son of a bitch? Because the good news is you're not. The bad news is you only have one day, starting now, to become a writer. You've got an idea for a story? Good. You've had that idea for a long time, and you're on this writing website to learn about how to write it. That's a good start. You know how to finish? Start writing. Because if you can't write your own idea, then you can't write shit, then you ARE SHIT, AND YOU'RE NOT A WRITER!!! What's that? Writing is hard? Writing takes time that you don't have? Your idea's weak? No, your idea isn't weak, you're fucking weak. A real writer could turn your weak idea into gold, because only one thing counts if you want to be a writer, and that's if you write. You hear me, you fucking asshole? A... B... W... A. Always B. Be W. Writing Always be writing. ALWAYS BE WRITING! S.C.P.C.T. Setting, Characters, Plot, Conflict, Theme. Setting: Where does the story take place? Characters: Who's doing what? Plot: What are they doing? Conflict: What the fuck is wrong? Theme: What will people say your book is about when they want to sound smart? Three Act structure: 1. Introduce them to your S.C.P.C.T. 2. Show rising conflict between all of your elements. 3. Conclude your story to the satisfaction of all the elements you presented. Four Act structure: 1. Introduce them to your S.C.P.C.T. 2. Show rising conflict that ends in a setback. 3. Show growth and discovery, culminating in setback being overcome. 4. Conclude your story to the satisfaction of all the elements you presented. Here's the part where you say: Uh, it's not that simple. You're just spoofing some old movie scene. There's more to writing than- THEN FUCKING WRITE IT!!!!! Because it's write or walk. Either you write, or you fuck off. 6,566,667 people visited Amazon's website today. You think they visited to get out of the rain? They visited the website looking for something to buy. They're just sitting there waiting to give you their money. Are you going to take it? Are you enough of a writer to take it? What's the problem? You there, with the face. What's your problem? You wonder what gives me the right to sit here and dare to tell you that to be a writer you need to write? You wonder what gives me the audacity to post something like this on a website full of other writers? Well, it's very simple. You didn't write today. You know who you are, you lazy fuck. While you were sitting there, doing something stupid, other people wrote. Look down there. That's stuff I've written. Because I want to be a writer. There's people reading this who've written ten times more than that. This isn't for them. It's for you. Some of those folders are full of garbage that I've edited out because it was bad. I've probably cut more words from unpublished crap than you have ever written. And all of it was worth it because I was learning how to write, what to write, what I liked to write, and how to sit down and just keep writing, because I wanted to be a writer. You think writing is a dream or love or a magic fart in the air? Wrong. Writing is a fucking skill, and you get good at a skill by practicing it again and again. It's a new year. Are you a nice woman? Gonna spent time with your boyfriend during this nice new year? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you. Get out of here and go play with your kids. Because if you want to be a writer, then WRITE! Write everyday! ALWAYS. BE. WRITING. I can pull up notepad right now with any idea you have and write 5,000 words in 2 hours. YES, RIGHT NOW!! If you think it won't be any good because I don't know your story, THEN YOU FUCKING DO IT!! Can you!? Why not? The idea's in your head, so sit down and write it! If not, I got no sympathy for you. One day you'll be reading one of MY books. And you know what you'll be saying? A loser sitting in a bookstore reading someone else's book? "I could be a writer..."
I'm in that boat. Too much time in the day I've squandered not doing too much of anything, and that would probably accumulate to a lot. Also, I should probably watch less films. I've been a bit of a film fiend these past couple of years. Though they can give some inspiration (or tell me what not to do, I can't spend my whole life only being inspired.
Now I am just depressed that I don't have 1000 novels to even get noticed out there on the market while only being 31. Thanks youtube, your crappy model has been adopted by amazon too.
Yup, this is why I stopped playing video games and stopped making excuses. Start being honest with yourself. Structure your life and environment around what you want.
Very inspiring. I'm north of 225kw with only 30% done on TC. I might be a bit north of 50kw with 25% on TNT. Even with two fingers, at 4 to 7 wpm, it can be done. Every page I write feels just like the very first page I wrote. Like, jumping off a... no, diving off a cliff. Right now, I don't give a fuck who might read it. Geeromino mutha fukka!
Yeah, this is why I'm sitting in fucking Antarctica to write. It's the next best alternative to what I really would need to do but can't/shouldn't/won't. But I can learn a lot, being here. ... as someone or another said
Well... damn. Guess I'm not as enthusiastic about being a professional writer as I had thought. Or maybe I do want to be one? The sheer raw energy of this post has got me questioning my resolve... and wanting to renew it. Talk about a verbal kick in the ass.
Thank you, and on Monday I will have to remember this since I will be 32. At least I have one book out, and a 2nd almost done. Best of luck with your works.
It is really a good guideline. Need perseverance, diligence and study with rapt attention to be a writer.
Lady Mormont speaks harshly...but truly. I didn't spend my time on writing because I didn't want more of my time dying for nothing....I was wrong...Zoupskim avenged my wasted time! He is the writer wolf! The King in the Forum! "The King in the forum! The King in the Forum!" Heheheh writing for the day.... Complete...
I've read everyone's comments very carefully, and thoroughly. After much consideration, I feel I have prepared a response that will address each and every thought expressed by the various different constituencies, and camps, and beliefs. *ahem* Listen the song below, and replace rise and awaken and mustakrakish with the word ~~WRITE~~ Repeat until book is complete.
I'm on the shy side of forty. Only now truly finding a love for writeing (i always have been a reader) my time is very limeted with a full time just and a family so I guess I better stop writing thins and start writing my stories....
Whilst I appreciate the message and the over the top, nay, tongue-in-cheek tone here, this kind of rant to would-be writers would have the opposite effect on me personally. Since when has anyone been driven to writing out of a sense of duty or guilt? Probably nobody. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
I may not have put it quite like this but 100% correct and true. The only reason I'm not writing today is, I have just finished my 8th draft of a 90k debut novel. Whilst I await my editors verdict I will begin my next novel tomorrow and already have the first three chapters outlined. So yes! Write write write!
I was in a group that was advised by Ben Bova that if we want to be writers we need to be writing for 3 to 4 hours a day even if what we write on a given day turns out to be junk. I'm 65 and currently in a rehab facility because of weakness, now I have the time to work on things that way. Actually, I'm forced to have the time for this, so I may as well take advantage of my situation and work on my personal monster. Besides, there is little else for me to do at 2:40 am EDT. Well, back to the 'salt mine', see some of you in a couple of days when I can make my first post to the workshop. That in its self could be a bit of a problem, I'm not sure if I'm working on a short story (what I started out to do), a novella, a novel (that was my second idea od what I might be working on), or an actual series (what I may be actually working on). See why I call it my monster? To top it off a few years ago before the needs of living took away the time I was using to write I offered a chapter on my MC's mother that I was working up as backstory, to a writer's group for critique a number of them wanted a story about her people, which I was seeing as a disposable race.