1. writer42

    writer42 New Member

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    Any tips on how to create mystery with limited words?

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by writer42, Dec 4, 2017.

    I have been told the convoluted wording I use when trying to fit in many ideas in a short narration ruins the suspense. Any tips?
     
  2. ChickenFreak

    ChickenFreak Contributor Contributor

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    How short?
     
  3. writer42

    writer42 New Member

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    Limiting the plot to a few pages (2-5 in moderately sized text) is where I have trouble, especially when writing a chapter that has to fit in between related but separate plot lines.
     
  4. OJB

    OJB A Mean Old Man Contributor

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    What do you mean by Convoluted wording?
     
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  5. writer42

    writer42 New Member

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    I have been told I cram wording together to make sentences that ramble (on the verge creating a run on sentence) by using "try hard" wording in order to condense ideas.
     
  6. writer42

    writer42 New Member

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    {Example: cramming words like superfluous or pedantic not to sound smart but to make it shorter than "he was nitpicking the whole idea"
     
  7. The Dapper Hooligan

    The Dapper Hooligan (V) ( ;,,;) (v) Contributor

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    Shorter sentences are better at creating suspense than long ones. Short. Punctuated. Sentences.
     
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  8. OJB

    OJB A Mean Old Man Contributor

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    First off, change 'Was nitpicking' to 'nitpicked' and cut the word 'whole' it is an empty adjective that adds nothing.

    -

    Concrete nouns and Active verbs should make up the bulk of your writing.
     
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  9. EdFromNY

    EdFromNY Hope to improve with age Supporter Contributor

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    A few questions:

    1. What are you trying to write? Short story? Novella? Novel? Screenplay?
    2. How far along are you in writing? Word count?
    3. Who told you it was "convoluted"? A friend? Relative? Teacher? Professional writer/editor?

    The answers will help direct the advice any of us may give you, rather than off-the-cuff comments, which can often be unhelpful.
     

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