A portion of my story concerns a fictional cat. He wants to kill a caged canary. How does he reach the lofty cage, extract the bird, and kill it? I don’t want it to be a totally conventional tooth and claw job. Something a bit unconventional and humorous would be nice. It doesn’t even have to be a plausible scenario. It needn’t too closely reflect the laws of physics, or the actual abilities of cats. I have an idea for a scenario, but it’s a bit dull. Mice are no problem, but birds are tricky… I was curious if anyone has some funny / curious suggestions – or at least a method of coming up with some more bird killing ideas myself…The brain has ceased. Thanks.
I assume you've seen the myriad attempts by Sylvester to capture and eat Tweety Bird. If not, you should review those old cartoons before you go much further. Google "Sylvester and Tweety"
Tarzanning to the cage, using the drapes, ceoiling light fixture, and a perfect double back flip... Sometimes over the top works well for humor.
He could try to knock the cage down with something- a broom handle, his own body weight, a particularly heavy and intricate paperweight. Or, if we're going full Sylvester-Vs-Tweety on it, he clould saw a hole down onto the top of the cage from the floor or roof above. Or, of course, you could try explosives.
Your nefarious kitty cat could disrupt the house's power supply and then trip someone over thus knocking the cage down and releasing the bird. It is only then that the cat will spring its ultimate surprise!
Let's see...cat in attic, hooks a Come Along hand winch to one of the roof support beams. Then, he attachs the other end of the device to a bolt extending up through the ceiling. The bolt is the anchor end of a ceiling-hook from which the birdcage hangs downstairs. After taking up slack in the come-along chain, the cat quietly cuts a circle in the sheetrock ceiling below him and begins to winch up the bird cage up. You can add humor to the attempt by making the ceiling hole a bit too small so the cat scrambles to open the hole further, only to weaken the ceiling where the cat is standing. When the cage finally gets to eye level with the pussycat, he licks his lips in anticipation of eating a delicious little bird, opens the cage door and -- crack -- the ceiling fails, sending ol'furball tumbling into the room below...maybe landing in front of a mean family dog or some similar nasty consequence.
All of the above. Get your cat more and more frustrated with his futile attempts at gaining his prize.
if the purpose is just to kill the canary, ie. he's not interested in eating it just silencing it, you could have him tip over a standing lamp, like one of those halogen jobs, so that the bulb smashes and for a brief moment, electrifies the cage.
Have the cat drop acid and then "fly" up to the cage. Your reader will sit back and ponder the bounds and definitions of reality for a long time after.
Good old fashioned problem solving. I don't know how they do it but my dad' cats can take down anything. (One of them took down a red hawk, are you freakin' kidding me?!) Anyways, cats are the masters of climbing, balancing, jumping, and waiting for the opportune moment to strike. So if there were something close to the cage, say a bookshelf or something, it's plausible that said feline would find a way.
Yes, I think it would be possible to write the story with the cat only doing cat-like things. Just exaggerated for humorous effect.
