1. Annihilation

    Annihilation Active Member

    Oct 23, 2014
    Likes Received:
    Phoenix, Arizona

    Can this plot work in a short story?

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Annihilation, Jan 7, 2015.

    The short story is about 20 pages.

    The story is about a boy who makes a wish on his birthday as a Hindu God passes through the galaxy.

    The moment causes the boy to travel back in time by years. He is left in an orphanage for five years and meets a girl there, who is soon revealed to be his new sister because he is adopted by a woman and her husband.

    He tells the story to his adoptive mother in the present, as an adult (throughout the story it cuts back to this talk)

    And towards the end, he writes a letter to his brother, not knowing if he's alive or dead. The letter is revealed at the very end.

    And all of these scenarios are divided by those five star borderlines.

    What do you guys think?
  2. obsidian_cicatrix

    obsidian_cicatrix I ink, therefore I am. Contributor

    Jul 15, 2013
    Likes Received:
    Belfast, Northern Ireland
    Write it and then I'll be in a better position to tell you. ;)
  3. Miles Montgomery

    Miles Montgomery New Member

    Jan 7, 2015
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    It sounds like an interesting story. Thing is it doesn't really show how he traveled in the summary. As the poster above stated, if you begin writing, we'll be in a better position to give you better and adequate feedback.
  4. LorenaTralala

    LorenaTralala Member

    Jan 9, 2015
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    Lawrence, KS
    For only 20 pages unless you have a very clear idea as how to fit it all I don't think it will work, even in this explanation you couldn't fit everything (who's the brother? Why does he have to travel in time?) I think adding time travel to a short story with a present day flashback plot is a bit too complicated. I say, look at your plot points as a whole, and decide what will muddle the story and what you absolutely cant live without then decide if what your keeping can be told the way you want it to be in the number of pages you've given yourself. Once that's done then come back and ask again.

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