1. Ettina

    Ettina Active Member

    Nov 21, 2011
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    catching a striga

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Ettina, Jul 10, 2012.

    OK, this gets complicated.

    My protagonists are a set of mad scientist twins, Tom and Joe, 9 years old (though they don't act 9), with the ability to drain magic (an insta-kill for many supernaturals) and the ability to read the minds of most supernaturals. Just recently, they discovered that they can rearrange the minds of supernaturals by phasing their fingertips into the target's head, but so far they only know how to cause random brain damage. Eventually, they'll be able to create mind-controlled slaves, but not for quite awhile.

    They've been living in this one town for several years, hunting vampires, and during this time they've figured out that the leader of the local vampires, Dimitri, isn't exactly a vampire - he's a closely related being, known as a striga. Both vampires and striga drink blood and are nocturnal, but vampires are essentially 'dead' during the day while striga are merely asleep. In addition, striga can turn into ravens and wolves, and change their apparent age (the maximum age they can be is the age they died, which for most was old age). Striga also have a supernatural charm which makes people slightly more likely to like and admire them, and many of them use this to reach positions of leadership. Furthermore, while vampires are turned by other vampires, strigas are born into certain bloodlines, mostly Slavic ones.

    Just recently, the twins captured and turned two homeless people into vampires to study them. And then two other kids with similar powers, Kale and Trevor showed up in town (they're the ones who taught the twins mind control), and Trevor killed Dimitri as part of a plot to lure a guy who hunts slayers into town. The twins know, but Trevor doesn't realize, that killing Dimitri will also bring several of his family members in to try to find their relative's killer.

    The twins hope to kidnap one or more of Dimitri's relatives to study them. However, the family has a great deal of power, and could make things very hard for the twins if they think the twins have hurt a family member. So the twins want to somehow capture a family member without the others getting suspicious.

    Would it be too convenient to have a younger family member tag along in secret because he didn't want to be left out of the excitement? Do you have any ideas for good plans for how to avoid suspicion over a striga family member going missing?
  2. Romeisburning

    Romeisburning New Member

    Jun 9, 2014
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    The Interstellar
    I like it very original. You definitely peeked interest as it kind of reminds me of white wolf Vampire Bloodlines type material. Run with this. Great material and seems like it will be fun to write !
  3. thewordsmith

    thewordsmith Contributor Contributor

    Nov 18, 2009
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    State of Confusion
    They are 9 yrs old? And they've been living in this one town for several years killing vampires? What? Since they were, like, four?

    Striga are born, not made... Hmm. That's another question. Is this a defective gene that causes the aberration or is it common among Slavs? Is there any outwardly visible indicator to show who is and who is not a striga among those ethnic Slavs?

    Striga are shape shifters? This makes the whole - 'To Catch a Striga' issue far more complicated because a containment that might hold a human or vulpine form would need to also be able to contain a raven form. So you have to take into consideration the physical shapes as well as power and abilities of a striga in any conceivable form.

    "Striga have a supernatural charm which makes people slightly more likely to like them..." I'm guessing you meant this in the Prince Charming, Suave and debonair type of supernatural charm, which suggests a certain degree of mind control rather than charm.

    "Would it be too convenient to have a younger family member tag along in secret because he didn't want to be left out of the excitement?" And, thereby be captured by the striga? It's a plot device that has been used many times before and can be effective if handled correctly. But...

    They are nine years old? And they've been doing this since they were... how old???

    See, I'm still having a problem with that age thing. And then the younger sibling would be, what? 8? 7? 5?

    And what are Mom and Dad doing while their junior mad scientist offspring are out killing vampires and where do the kiddies plan to 'store' their specimens once they have captured them? In Mumsy and Daddy's cellar?

    I think you could make this story work and work well but I also think you've got some serious plot holes that need to be considered to make it believable, even with the most willing suspension of disbelief.

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