Using this equation to help create your story and main character (sorry I can't remember what it's called): *Greatest fear *His lie *His flaw *His want *His wound *External and internal issues ...etc I have a question about my hero (after lots of character growth, and overcoming his fears...etc) overcoming the Lie he believes. My hero's Lie is that he believes that if he can't save his mother, he will be all alone. ( Without going into a ton of story explanation he's had no one his entire life and seeks to save/find his most beloved mother. Lest he thinks he will have no one if she is gone ) Blah blah, stuff happens and he makes new friends. When is an appropriate point for the hero to overcome this lie? Ie. Realise that he has these new Friends and will not be left alone? The many books I've read say act 3 is a good point to overcome the lie, but that's pretty late to realise that the people who have been helping you are your friends/family now. But on the other hand, if I do it too early the climax and his conquering of internal issues wont be satisfactory. Im really bad at explaining my thoughts. So I'm really sorry if this doesn't make sense.
Personally I'd not pressure myself to make a point (especially a waypoint) of it and settle on having the character's change implied. I'd thread in the info in through the course of the story. Events, new friends, distracting challenges and time all playing their part as I progress the narrative. For all those other challenges you listed above I'd pretty much use the same approach too. As a reader I much prefer to pick up on subtleties than see something prescribed/forced/formulaic.
This looks like KM Weiland's structure, but I don't know how unique it is to her. I agree that it should definitely be a process and the moment should really be the point at which the change becomes obvious and undeniable. What that means here is up to you, but consider what he would never have done at the start of the book and what he would do now.
You're right to trust your gut. I think act 3 is a bit too late. Maybe the end of act 2? Any earlier will be apart of the opening sequence of setting the story up and it will play no part in the climax. Good luck!
Kill the mother. Or have her in some horrific accident that puts her out of commission and have his mates all there to support him.
Do it subtly. Usually the details will tell the reader enough without whomping them over the head with it. Take The Wizard of Oz - in the book the scarecrow, tin man and lion prove they have brains, heart, and bravery before the wizard pours some porridge of pins and needles into the scarecrows head for brains and oh … I can't remember what the other two got. And if you play it right the reader understands that the items the wizard hands out are merely symbolic tokens for what they already have. So you should be dismantling the lie along the way until he finally realizes it.
