Alright, I am brainstorming for a book that I am trying to write a science fiction story, I have the setting thought up. I will describe it below for context. The setting takes place 3562 AD, where monsters are set free by a failed containment experiment of a sample of DNA from a Aliquam Diabolus Unguiculatum specimen. The genetics of this creature is made to rapidly multiply on its own, letting them to reproduce asexually and mutate at a rapid pace. In response, the human population created a defense team, the SSRT (Strategic Safety Response Team), which specializes in hunting and killing theses beasts and their mutated states. Even regular units go under heavy training sessions of endurance, loyalty, and weapon specialties. (If you need more, I will add in response to your comments.) I have two characters thought up of; Main Characters Name: Jonathan Saigas Age: 19 Appearance: Long brown hair, green eyes, very slim, average height, somewhat pale, a slight blemish on the chin, high-prescription glasses, always wears an old silver ring on his finger. Personality: Highly intelligent (top of his class), somewhat calm, a victim of high expectations from family, friends, and mentors cause him to be a closet depressive and easily disappointed in himself. He is terrified of letting someone down on a promise or task, but in correlation he is very supportive of his friends and family. Due to the high expectations, he is a perfectionist in his field, hence his high intelligence. HIs closeted homosexuality also leads to even more pressure that contributes partly to his hidden depression Bio: Born in the Lomarand District, a wealthy city of scholars and merchants, Jonathan was born into a noble family. His father was a Captain of an SSRT Squadron, his mother was a scientist that works for the local government. His parents sent him to the regional SSRT academy in response to the recent danger that approaches their district. Jonathan graduated at the top of his He was chosen to be a intelligence specialist, and was teamed up with a ten year old tuber (a child created in a test tube), a weapons expert, and a marksman. His team has been a part of no missions yet, but instead, they undergo intense training in a virtual reality that undergoes various situation. Name: Miles Green Age: 10 Appearance: Average size for his age, blonde hair, yellow eyes, (can't come up with much more, suggestions for Miles' appearance would be appreciated). Personality: Mature for his age, but still childish. Miles' intelligence is rivaled by that of only Jonathan and graduated recruits, his mechanic and engineering is the envy of the entire student population. He is calm and kind hearted, very helpful to his friends. He is the emotional support of the group and is not only renown for his intelligence, but also his constant smile. Bio: Born in a test tube, Miles was created to be the perfect pilot, mechanic, and engineer. The day he was taken out of the tube, he had the physical being of a four year old boy and the mindset of an eight year old. He spent his whole life training and learning about SSR technology, giving him the upper hand on mechanical and piloting skills. He is placed on Jonathan's squadron. I would appreciate it greatly if any criticisms, suggestions, and (especially) ideas for other characters could be sent to this thread. Thank you, Saigonias
It sounds like you've put good effort in coming up with their personalities, especially Jonathan's. One criticism about Miles is that he's "mature for his age, but still childish". On the surface it sounds contradictory but this can work pretty well if you delve into the reasons why he's mature in certain situations but childish in others. Perhaps his maturity is a defense mechanism, a sign of his insecurities. Does he look a lot younger than his age? He may act childish when he feels comfortable around others who he feels won't judge him. I can really see these two becoming good friends. Of course some pushing would be required on Mile's part to initiate friendly chatter. I don't have suggestions on more characters.. it's late and I can't think right now.
I like character development so I'll take a shot at someone for you. Off hand, the first thing that strikes me is that both of your existing characters are English-speaking males. So I'll give you one to add gender and ethnic diversity. Her personality traits should also make her a fun supporting character to Jonathan's more depressive side. I took some liberties imagining details of your universe but obviously those are fungible. Kalpana Vadra Age: 17 Home: Gangtok District (present day Sikkim, India) Appearance: Petite (Five feet, one inch tall). Shoulder length black hair, medium Brown skin, Brown eyes. Thin, not heavily muscled but very flexible as her job involves climbing and tight space. Personality: Plucky, consistently and annoyingly optimistic. Often reckless in dangerous situations, not because she doesn't know better but because she is very confident in her training and gets a rush from danger. Total adrenaline junkie. Bio: Born in the backwater Gangtok District, Kalpana had a rural upbringing and carries a chip on her shoulder due to the perception that she is a naive farm girl. She feels a strong need to prove herself to be the intellectual equal of urbane city dwellers like Jonathan. In fact, her parents were not farmers but highly educated agricultural engineer s who were born in the city and assigned to Gangtok District to improve crop yield in the economically depressed region. Profession: Like most women in the SSRT, Kalpana is her squadron's "knocker" - an explosives expert recruited for her small stature and ability to fit into tight spaces. Knockers are employed as their squadron's primary weapon against underground-dwelling sub-species of Aliquam. She has been highly trained in climbing and acrobatics so that she can climb down holes, specifically the ventilation shafts of the larger colonies of "Ant Type" Aliquams, who dig large colonies that humans sometimes don't realize are under their feet. Knockers like Kalpane function as exterminators by rigging the colony's ventilation shafts with explosives and then killing the whole colony in explosive demolition.
I don't want to give you ideas for characters 'cos I think that's your job, but I will point out that you've got a lot of potential for interesting character development with the kid who's born in the test tube - he's got no parents, he might come to realize that he's slightly different to everyone else, also make sure you consider what it would be like to born at the age of 8 - You've made him kind and warm hearted but I think people who are overly intelligent are generally lacking in social skills and can seem a bit cold. That might seem cliche but it's actually a thing in real life, the best scientists are generally quite close to being autistic. In fact while I'm at it it seems to me that he wouldn't be very childish at all, he's spent his whole life learning about weapons and stuff, if you ask me he hasn't really lived enough of a childhood to be childish. If you see what I mean? But again this can be explored in different ways if he's bitter about it. Good luck!
@HelloThere Yeah, but he wasn't training in weapons. He was trained in piloting and machinery. He never was trained in weaponry. @Commandante Lemming Well, this is the local SSR facility. I should've added that there are multiple facilities around the world and this one is in America.
Weaponry, mechanics, piloting... It doesn't really matter, the point is that he's been forced to devote his life to something at such a young age. I don't know about you, but I'd have some issues if I'd been manufactured for the sole purpose of fighting monsters. This raises a lot of interesting questions, like is it morally right to force a child into doing something? Is it morally right to create a person artificially? This sort of stuff will make your story a lot more interesting.
