oh wait everyone this is a redone version with some improvements to the plot : 800 years ago shortly after the present day, as overpopulation and unrest mounted on Earth, a number of new political organizations were formed, including the Ascendant and the Dominion cult, who later became bitter rivals. These organizations lead the race to humanity's discovery of terraformation, by funding and encouraging technological progression in this field. In the end Russia was the first to discover it, under the auspices and funding of the Ascendant. The new technology was launched into the space, with the terraforming gear aboard, to spearhead the colonization of new worlds, under the command of the Ascendant organization, who funded the project. The launching of the vessels sparked the first wave of human expansion beyond the confines of Earth, founding the first colonies on Mars, the Moon, Venus, and Mercury. In later years they terraformed planet and moons, and expanded their civilization beyond Earth and throughout much of the solar system. Many worlds were colonized thanks to the development of the terraformation. The discovery, had ignited a prosperous time of technology and exploration for Humans, known as the Age of Eden. During the expansion however, mysterious and ancient technology was discovered scattered across several planets throughout the solar system. In the decades that followed, these mysterious artifacts boosting military might and technological advancements, but as tensions between the colonies grew, due to the race for the valuable technology spread across the solar system, colonies became distrustful of each others growing power. finally tensions escalated to a boiling point, and it eventually lead to civil war. During the war however, accidental reactivation of an alien artifact known as the Black Stone resulted in the arrival of an alien robot race known as the Perverted. The basis for the coming of the Perverted was a force that controlled the very fabric of space and time, the Black Stone. These aliens waged a campaign of destruction against our civilization nearly driving us to extinction. The archive where humans had kept their research and knowledge from the Age of Eden, was lost.
so i wrote up a quick outline of the main events, but i dont know if it is sound enough to begin fill in the lines, so to speak : Defender revived 1 Defender meets Keeper 2 Defender helps other Defenders fend off a Perverted raid 3 Defender tasked to find lost Defender group on Moon meets an old rogue Defender called the Huntsman 4 Huntsman helps Defender search for class Defender finds them in a battle with a Perverted military unit Defender discovers that the Perverted are raising an army in the forgotten city Mercury 5 Defender goes with the found class to the city to thwart the plot Defenders storm the security facility 6The Defender shuts down their warp gate by de activating the Black Stone 7 Lina, a fellow Defender, is captured by a Harbinger, a Perverted commando 8 Defenders pursue the Harbinger to a dreadnought Defenders raid the dreadnought in search of her 9 They find her in a detention cell and free her this is a basic skeleton, but is it interesting enough to be a story, or is there soe things i can add to the plot to make it interesting
Well, because it is not the same, it is similar, yes but this one is not focusing on the past but the present, in other words the first topic was about the story leading up to this point, this topic is about the events transpiring now, after all of that, but it seems.....lacking...in both mystery, and in intrigue, so I Put this up to see what I'm missing, I mean I would like for the defender to look for the other group because of a conspiracy or something, this is where I am stuck, also thank you so much for your advice on my other topic, my back story is way better, and it is a thousand times more readable and interesting than I started off
i started writing the story and got to around maybe a third of the plot points for it before i begin the first draft, but am stumped as to where i should take it from here as to make it climatic and intriguing, as it leads up to the the final battle to destroy the Black stone a device that controls a Perverted warp gate closing it and halting their ability to enter our galaxy any ideas???????? here is what i have so far: When the story begins, the player's Defender awakens and is met by a scientist who informs the Defender that he is now a cyborg due to a consciousness transfer, and that the Defenders memory was lost during the process. Shortly after, the scientist's assistant guides the Defender to the Citadel where the Keeper, the city's steward, is awaiting the Defenders arrival. After making their way to the Citadel they meet the Keeper, who briefs them about the Perverted. The Defender is then tasked to locate and aid battling Defenders secure a Haven gate breach in the North end of the city due to a Perverted raid. After the battle the Defender is contacted by the Huntsman, a mysterious character who summons him to the Moon, to find a lost class of Defender known as the Protectors. When the Defender arrives on Moon the Huntsman tells the Defender about the Protectors, who disappeared years ago and now have reappeared on Mars. After arriving on Mars, the Defender discovers that the Protectors have left for the Forgotten City, Venus. The Defender travels to the Forgotten City, the birthplace of many technological wonders, where he locates the Protectors engaged in a firefight with Perverted forces over a security facility. After aiding the Protectors secure the facility, the Defender discovers that the Protectors have been trying to find and secure a lost archive containing the lost secrets of the Age of Eden. After they locate the the archive buried beneath the facility, the Defender and the Protectors kill the Perverted invaders, before approaching a sealed door, covered with vines and branches. The Defender and Protectors make their way down a spiraling set of steps before entering the large abandoned space. After locating the archive terminal, several squads of Perverted Drones charge into before the Protectors can extract the information inside the terminal. The group begins to repel the invasion while one of their members named Lina,extracts the remaining information onto a data module. However A squad of Perverted Stealth Harbingers appear, on the other side of the terminal, capturing Lina who tosses the module to the Defender. any help would be greatly appreciated, ( by the way , im not trying to write this by committee, just have a hard time thinking outside of the limited amount of stories iv read, and am trying to keep original and not to close to the material i draw from) thanks for any help !
Please stop using bold... It's hard to read in large chunks of paragraph. Also, why not keep all of this in a single thread? This is like your third one on the same project/subject.
Sorry about the bold, but as for the thread this I was trying to post it here originally but something with my user rights didn't let me, so I put the first one somewhere else, the second was a revision of the first but couldn't find the delete thread button so when I was finally allowed to post here I did but if been trying to delete the other two posts forever, I even contacted an administrator, who did not get back to me?
Not sure why you want to fit elements of climate in there but you could introduce a 'super freeze', a deus ex machina event that sees your troubled defender and Lina held in a moment to reflect on their endeavours and the mad pace at which their story has unfolded. They take time out in this stasis to consider a paced and well considered plan that'll see them, as a pair, save the day and give themselves and their readers a happy ever after.
That's odd, you should have had access to here from the bat. There is no delete button, we rarely even close threads here. You can always edit your OP (I think you need senior rank for it) or just add a new post. The people who are already helping you are probably more likely and more informed to add more thoughts and opinions than people in a brand new thread. I'm sure the mods will get back to you.
But how? their in the middle of an attack, alien forces have attacked and abducted and taken her to their dreadnought, and the defender and protectors are helpless to stop it, the only way to save her would-be for them to storm the dreadnought and save her
Oh well, thanks for the heads up I'll look into that maybe I was trying to post while signed out? Who knows
I'm going to sound like a broken record here but it's common for some people to see their novel as a series of cool events, a climax and a resolution. If you think instead, what is the story you are telling, what is the main conflict, and how do you want to resolve or not resolve it, you will have a framework to hang the series of events or plot points on.
What you sated above is what I'm trying to do, but the whole problem is that I don't know what the resolution or the main conflict will be to begin with!
3 of your threads have been merged (the history, bullet point list of your plot, and your plot summary). As a rule we don't delete threads, and threads usually only get closed when it's been flamed/derailed, otherwise it's left opened for replies so everyone can benefit from it. In the future, just post to the same thread if it's just an expansion of the same issue, or you can edit your posts
gee thanks, i contacted wreybies... i think.... but he never answered me back???? thank you for your help
This is the one thing we can't write for you. You are a rudderless ship. So, do some research into internal and external conflict in fiction writing for some ideas. http://www.how-to-write-a-book-now.com/external-conflict.html http://literarydevices.net/conflict/ http://wiredforstory.com/wired-for-story/
hey guys i just got an idea for a new character im going to use to pull the main protagonist through the story, which is a character named the Huntsman, and he is ancient Defender, who has contacted the protagonist towards the beginning of the story and essentially send him all over the solar system going on all kinds of missions to thwart and destroy alien bases and eventually closing the portal they use to get into our galaxy, but the problems is that i cant figure out what kind of personality he is going to have and if he is going to be accompanying the protagonist or not..... now i want to give all the credit to the person who wrote this : ( or just one, maybe coming back from some hardware mishap - an older model that everyone thought was shutdown reawakens and knows stuff that the current group doesn't ) thanks
Relax, take a walk and calm yourself. No writing is something that can't come to you naturally if you allow it to happen. My advice: Read it aloud to yourself, a myriad of times if necessary... and soon you'll see just what needs cleaning, straightening and lengthening. No one will recognize it better than you.
that is a good idea, honestly i've been reading it all morning, and a host of new ideas flooded in, i think ill start to do that regularly.....welcome to the writer forums by the way, you'll meet a ton of very talented and friendly people here, im glad i came!
Thank you, Defender. I know the day I started reading letters I'd written (to say politicians and so on) aloud that made all the difference in the world. I admit though, the only times I read my fiction out loud is when something about it stinks like rotten caca, but once having read them through it's amazing what comes to light (especially the errors lol).
