Okay, I need a really good non-cliche reason why my love interest would leave the main character. I'm stuck between having her discover something horrible about him, (like, he was her brother's best friend, and I've thought having him be the one who got the brother the drugs he overdosed on) and sending him away, basically. Or having him leave for some noble reason. Also, I'm drawing a blank on how to write the love part of it. I want it to be a very intense love, I have them making out the second day they know each other, and it's a very deep love, so they're instantly comfortable with each other. But, I am very worried that it will start to sound cheesy, and fluffy, so tips? Also, what are some cliches i need to avoid with this sort of thing. I suppose it will be a Young Adult Novel, the main character is 18, and the dude is 21.
I don't believe in love at first sight, or that "instantly comfortable" equals "very deep". Why can't they be friends, first? As for the breakup, maybe... She's just sick of him whining all the time and not being able to get over her brother, when even she herself managed to. So it's not like she can't empathize with suffering, but with him hanging on to his tragic demeanor, the mask of "Oh, I'm so morose and schmexy," just because he's more comfortable in it... this means she never really gets to know the real him. (And also that he's not really grieving his best friend, just using this tragedy as another accessory to this mask. Harsh, but she could see it that way even though it's not true.) Maybe she was just using him to get back in touch with her brother, who she can't get over, though she had an epiphany: that nothing will ever bring him back and she should learn to let go... of most things that that tie her to his memory for unnecessary suffering. At least a break, to see how she feels without the gentlemanly poet, for her to see if she would really miss him for him, or only what he represented to her. Or, maybe she doesn't want to fall into the fantasy of only dating somebody who is damaged and troubled, so she can feel special (I changed him with my love! Healed him with my light! He's sulky at everything else, but he smiles around me and only me!) Perhaps she just realizes that it's unfair to use him like this, to fulfill this fantasy, or perhaps a friend of hers spiraled into that same fantasy with a more abusive man (he was a jerk to everybody else, but when they were first dating he'd be nice to her so she felt special. Then, getting bored, he took to treating her as badly as everyone else, but she stuck around because she thinks she should just try harder to change him with her love.) Or, being his muse, she doesn't feel like he loves her but only the idea of her or whatever act she puts on when she's around him, that she's now too afraid to shed. The "noble reason" like 3rd season Buffy, on Spiderman and the 6th Harry Potter, I've read quite good criticisms of. When half of a romantic couple dumps the other "for a noble reason" what they are really saying is "I'm more noble than you" and more importantly that they don't respect the dumpee's decision to have begun or continued with the relationship in the first place. Self-righteous jerks. If it's you, say so; if it's me, say so-- but don't hide behind some Cause. If she breaks it off with him because she finds out that he gave his best friend and her brother the drugs that killed him... I think it will ring hollow for me. If he didn't do it on purpose, if he apologizes, then I think it's more an excuse than a reason for your MC to leave him. If he meant to do it, and his best friend didn't know, and he's not sorry... much better reason, but I don't want them to ever get back together again. Just my *stole penny smiley from ungood, hope that's okay*
Well see, actually I was thinking of using the drugs thing as an excuse. Where she was using him as sort of a life line out of this dark place she was at with her brother. Because he can protect and shelter her. Her brothers and dad can do this but they have other people to steal the attention. The love interest's main proragative is the girl. So when she finds out the he's weak, that he isn't this rock, she freaks out, and sends him away. By the way, when I said poet I didn't mean some emo dude moping about the whole time. Quite the opposite, he holds everything in, and so does she. The relationship is real for him, and he's grieving naturally. Where as she is just clinging to this last tie to her brother, and isn't allowing herself to grieve at all.