I posted a prologue to the main action of a story on this thread. The story I intended to write concerns MC's action of vengeance against Benedict. As a brief story of "A does a dastardly an highly original deed to B", it lacks plot, and is not a proper story. A big question is "Why did he do it?" So, I started with a backstory, to lead up to the main events. The "doing the deed" story would not be particularly long, so I wanted to just set the stage and get on with it. That's when I found the "voice" and tried to use the circumlocutious or quaint-polite speaking that is reminiscent of Poe or Lovecraft, and harmonizes with the idea of MC having a warped mind. After writing this opening, and getting some feedback, I need to rethink how I put it all together. Assuming the full story is rather short, how should I tell this story?
It could be done in 1st person, so that the readers may not know the main character has a warped mind. It would add intrigue and suprise when they find out. A good portion of the novel would be his thoughts on the world around him as he leads up to the event, and possibly his interactions that would let the reader understand why he was going to commit the deed.
No, sorry. I didn't read the sample. The link isn't working for me. But that's what I thought would work for the story, and if you are already doing that, then it's great. But I'll emphasize something you already said you were doing: stick to the voice. I've read authors that have great character voices but one small instance where they go off of that voice ruins the story for me. Make sure to ask yourself: what would my character say if this happened?
