A game I've just come up with. Post (fake) news bulletins of history repeating itself in the future. Example: "This just in: A lunar colonist claims the Jupiter landing was staged."
'Update - the mutant strain of Pink bat flu that is transmissable to humans has killed almost 30 people worldwide - experts predict as much as half the human population could be wiped out.' does that count?
"Breaking news: George Bush tracked down and trialed for crimes against humanity. America is refusing to extradite the prisoner."
And finally this story from France where townspeople uncovered a well-hidden jar with a label that reads, "GTE - The Grow Taller Elixar!" French authorities are now admitting that supporting documentation confirms that twice a day Napoleon rubbed the creamy lotion on the top of his head and on the soles of his feet. According to the label the product as a "100% money back guarantee! If you do not grow at least 3 inches in 3 months - just return any unused portion and your 3 francs will be promptly returned!" As a footnote, the company is still in business and when presented the artifact did refund the 3 francs - but only after collecting 48,031 Euros in postage and handling fees. Sorry - I just reread the directions - I guess I projected the present onto history. Better next time. Doug J.
And yet more expenses scandals from the galactic supreme senate tonight with Senator Canthru claiming for payments on a second moon base that didn't even exist.
Jan, 12,2010 - President Obama out laws snowboarding, because he thinks it is a colder versions of water boarding.
Newsflash - Eating banned for health and safety reasons in 8 London boroughs, with plans to extend the scheme across the country. From tomorrow onwards, nourishment will be provided 24/7 in the form of a portable drip attached to the person's forearm. The practice has been established in America for 3 months, after at least 2 instances of 'choking-or-obesity-related-deaths' in the past decade, deemed 'unacceptable' by health commentators. Council spokepeople stated last night 'It has been long known that people simply don't have the mental faculties necessary to self-impose a healthy, regulated and body-convenient diet. As a preventative measure against the 98% obesity epidemic, and significant choking risk of food, around 50000 people have been fitted with personal nourish-drips. This will significantly reduce death rates related to traditional consumption methods. Health and safety surveys show that eating is simply too unsafe to be allowed to continue.'
Our top story tonight concerns the outbreak of the Snipe Flu pandemic that has put a halt on the Olympics, mass transit and riding elevators. All listeners are warned to not go out at night to hunt Snipe, and if they hear a Snipe, which will sound an awful lot like your Uncle George cupping his hand and yelping like a hawk trying out for American Idol - to not go into the woods, or attempt to touch anything that looks like it has feathers, a beak or three toes at the end of spindely yellow legs.
